Under the Bridge: the Troll Cage

[contrabasso_classico]

TROLL #1 - Countryfried_Portobello
(Edit by C.F.)


Hey Don!!!

Excellent advice to our friend Wes. It is obvious that Wesley has "sloppy technique" because of the placement of his bridge. Seasoned players like you and I know that his lousy setup is "as wrong as can be". I have one query for you, what are the key components of "proper setup" and "proper technique". You seem to be a real expert, I can't wait to hear your opinion. Thanks.

contrabasso

[Don Higdon]

I see you're back.
It's not obvious to me that Wes has sloppy technique, nor did I say so. Only you said so. Wes is a self-described newcomer to the instrument, with a teacher and an inquiring mind. I suspect he'll do fine.
I addressed only the components of bridge setup that he cited. Generally speaking, the bridge should be aligned with the F-hole notches ('north-south') and centered ('east-west') with the fingerboard. There are exceptions, of course, such as when over centuries a bass loses its symmetry, in which case it's a judgement call for a competent luthier.
I don't represent myself to be an "expert" at anything, not even reading skills.

[Chris Fitzgerald]

Originally posted by contrabasso_classico
Hey Don!!!

Excellent advice to our friend Wes. It is obvious that Wesley has "sloppy technique" because of the placement of his bridge. Seasoned players like you and I know that his lousy setup is "as wrong as can be". I have one query for you, what are the key components of "proper setup" and "proper technique". You seem to be a real expert, I can't wait to hear your opinion. Thanks.

contrabasso

CHEFBOYARDEE RAVIOLIO,

Your history on Talkbass has not been forgotten. If you try to pick up where you left off, you won't last long. Write it down.

[contrabasso_classico]

Chris and Don,

Thanks for the warm welcome back to talkbass!! I apologize for complimenting Don on his expertise in this area, he seemed to take it as an insult. Looking forward to further bass oriented discussion.

yours,

contrabasso

BTW chris, what am i supposed to write down??

[Chris Fitzgerald]

This thread is being created for the purpose of keeping the DB side of the board as Troll-free as possible. Information on and posts by known and suspected DB trolls will be placed here in a locked thread. The purpose for doing this is so that everyone who is an actual contributing member will be more easily able to identify and avoid said trolls. I'm also counting on everyone to step up to the plate and treat these annoying CLOWNS with the respect they deserve when they try to make return visits.

If anybody catches one of these losers stepping out of bounds AT ALL, let me know and I'll transfer the offending posts here, where they will remain on display so that anyone who takes the time to read the thread will have a short list of known MORONS to refer to when there is any doubt about the legitimacy of a questionable post. If you find yourself dealing with a known troll in an active thread, please feel free to toy with/dismember it until it can be locked up: just do your best to stay within the posting guidelines, and I'll sweep up the mess later. You can do it people...I BELIEVE in you.

[Chris Fitzgerald]

Originally posted by contrabasso_classico
Chris and Don,

Thanks for the warm welcome back to talkbass!! I apologize for complimenting Don on his expertise in this area, he seemed to take it as an insult. Looking forward to further bass oriented discussion.

yours,

contrabasso

BTW chris, what am i supposed to write down??

No one here is blind. Back at the beginning of the year, the DB board recorded a record number of Troll postings right at the end of January, a trend which continued to dribble on over the next few months. Many of these postings were made by a single troll who went by many names. Some of these included: Bassturbator, Bass-to-pus, BassLix66, and god (who has since been eliminated and banned). The username CoNtRaBaSsO_cLaSsIcO showed up at about the same time and exhibited the same characteristics as the postings by the above trolls. In addition, these idiots took to email and PM harassment of certain members (who shall remain nameless) who mentioned the fact to me. I was not a moderator then...if I had been, I would have tried to get all of the above banned. I am a moderator now, and what I wanted you to write down is the following:

As long as I am moderating, this side of the board will have a ZERO TOLERANCE POLICY FOR TROLLS in effect. You already have two strikes against you in my book. If you revert back to your old ways, I will see to it that you get banned from this site. I will also not hesitate to delete and/or edit your posts if I deem them out of line. The buck stops here. Are you getting all of this, or do I need to slow down and pronounce everything phonetically?

[Chris Fitzgerald]

Troll(s) # 1a and 1b (both subsidiary personalities of Troll #1)

Originally posted by Bassturbator [b]


I find it most effective to tune my tailpiece before a performance to match the pitches of the designated "false harmonics". I then bow below the bridge to produce "the harmonic effect".

bassturbator

Originally posted by BassLix66


Mr. Bassturbator has a point with the tunable tailpiece. I do the same quite often, although I do not have adjustors on my tailpiece. Instead pull the tail piece really hard. I don't do this manually, of coarse (the first time I did, and I almost tore the bridge off), but rather I use a complicated system of magnets, allen head wrenches, electrical wires, and duct tape. I have just patented this, so be on the lookout for "Tailpiece Tuners" in music stores throughout the country. Another thing you can do is detune your bass. You said it was an F harmonic? Well, if there are any bars of rest, you can tune your G down a step (to an F) to play the harmonic. Of coarse, to compinsate for the lack of tension, you would have to tune your E up a step (to F#). I do this quite often. Gerde Rienke, the greatest contrabass player in the world, does this all the time. Anyways, if you don't want to bother with the tailpiece or the tuning of the strings, I believe you'll find a natural F harmonic on the G string, above fingerboard (above the second octave). Good luck!

[god jr.]

HAHA, Don, your joke is very funny...

haha...

uh.... haha

Wow!! hahaha

[god jr.]

Originally posted by god jr.
HAHA, Don, your joke is very funny...

haha...

uh.... haha

Wow!! hahaha

accually, that is soooooo funny

[Chris Fitzgerald]

Originally posted by god jr.
HAHA, Don, your joke is very funny...

haha...

uh.... haha

Wow!! hahaha

DIAPER DEITY,

What did I tell you about bringing your "B" game into the paint on this end of the floor? If I've said it once, I've said it a thousand times: Either take it to the rim, or take it home.

Now get back in your cage and be quiet like a good little troll...


Yours truly,

DURRLKEMBE MUTOMBO

[god jr.]

Chris, why do you always act like an bass player?
I am not a troll, and nobody is troll. where did you get idea from? (haha.. it's funny..) what was wrong with laughing at Don' s joke? I thought it was funny.

So, why don't you just leave me alone

anyways, have a great day!

yours

[Chris Fitzgerald]

BABY BUDDHA,

Whatever.

Why do I always act like a bassplayer? You figure it out, Einstein.....

Don't try to snow the snowman. If you want to complain, why don't you email Paul? I'm sure that after he and JT went to the trouble to get "god sr." eliminated, he'll be really receptive to your complaint....but hey, if I'm wrong, you should really pursue this if you feel you are being ill-treated.

Here's what I see: I see the return of COUNTRYFRIED_PORTOBELLO (a known troll, the TROLLITUDE of which I have no doubt whatsoever) a week or so ago..... after a couple of posts, Mr. SPAGHETTIO gets slammed and locked away where he belongs. Then - what was it, a couple of days later? Or maybe even just one day? - I find a "New Member" with a blank profile whose namesake was one of the worst trolls we've ever had, and who seems to be targeting at least one of the folks who was harassed by god/basslix/bassturbator/countryfried_portobello etc... last year at about this time. One word: Duh. It doesn't take a genius to figure that one out, knowwhatahmean?

I have an idea for you - how about you either email Paul and complain about your ill-usage here in DB, or start over with a fresh new username that has no negative connotations. Either is fine with me. If you choose the former option, I'll hear from Paul, and we'll sort the situation out. If you choose the latter, you'll be starting out with a clean slate, and we'll take it from there - but fill in your profile and try to make some serious bass-related posts if you go this route, or you'll end up right back where you started: in the Troll Cage.

Fair enough, Moriarty?


Yours,

DURRLOCK HOLMES

[john turner]

posting using multiple user ids is a good recipe for getting banned.

furthermore, since you have yet to post anything relevant to actually having a DB chris would be in his rights to delete all your tripe out of hand.

[Chris Fitzgerald]

Message by DURRL and DONOSAUR...image borrowed from a post by the lovely and talented Dancehallclasher.

[Mike Money]

New Troll: MILK MONEY

The following post was posted as a new thread called, "*Kicks over trash can*" - DURRL

Ha!

*runs*