Adjusting SABDDI settings

[rustinstrings]

Hello,
Here's the deal -
I'm playing Spector DLX 5 throug programmable SABDDI using various amps in rehearsal rooms.
Each time it sounds different.
I usually plug in directly to the guitar input in the amp, using as flat eq as possible on the amp and one of my 3 presets - "calm/natural", "driven more", "everything quite amaxed out".
My favorite setting is the maxed out one, because that's when I get to hear myself playing aggressively with little pick effort (playing near the neck) on top of 2 distorted guitars.
The only trouble is that when listening to recordings, I sound like a twangy rubber band, and in parts when I "rock out" too much, my attack almost sounds like an additional snare (!). so I need to re-adjust.
Another problem is that the same BDDI preset sounds too much over the top when I happen to play through GK amps (my calm/natural preset is aggressive enough for it) but is quite weak for Marshall ones (can't remember the model - it has "classic"/"modern" selection button) - that's where I choose the maxed out settings.

Long story short, my question is how to achieve a consistent tone for various rooms/amps settings? Is there a rule of thumb when playing with presets so I can get enough drive/presence but not too much? Note that when at home I plug directly to a digitech bp-8->soundcard/headphones and the BDDI doesn't make sense there at all (noise/clipping).