A couple of caveats to my response: First, I'm on my phone, so doing a quick A/B is impossible, and the song's long intro makes it tough to really remember how the previous version sounded once the band had kicked in. Secondly, I'm listening on horrible JVC headphones that tend to add more low mid content than any other system I have for reference.
That said, is version 2 slightly louder than the original?
Either way, it's a nice mix. Good job.
FS: DBX 286A Channel Strip (FS thread coming soon!)