First off, well done! This is not an easy excerpt regardless to your level of study, and going into a college audition with that in the bag is really great.
As for constructive criticism:
Dynamics: It is a youtube video and things get compressed, I have no idea what you are recording on/with, the space isn't ideal etc. You might be doing these already, but you can likely do more. The < into rehearsal 10 could be bigger, and you want to really bring out that bar. The > < just before 11 could be more dramatic too. You are going from fff down to f, so although you still want it to be loud, it's a big change. Your < coming out could be more gradual, as it arrives on the Bb.
Body language/movement: You have a pretty quiet upper body, which is great. It's easy to play this excerpt and move too much. Try not to count/attack by head bobbing. It will get you into trouble in a section one day, and the panel is not going to want to see it. Along those same lines, your breath/cue after long notes is pretty audible. It can be helpful, but an entire orchestra doing it would make this a very different piece.
You slid into your high Bb before 12, but that's really getting down to splitting hairs.
It sounds great and those are some pretty small suggestions. Honestly if you went into an audition and played it as well as the video, they will be very happy with that.