Am I deaf or just *****whipped?

[T-Bird]

Hi.

Well I am technically totally deaf in my right ear, but this thread isn't about that .

For over a year now we have had this gorgeous woman sing several tunes in our band because our singer didn't like to be with us anymore, and good riddance I may add .

She's the drummers wife and a real looker, but I've never have thought her "like that", if You know what I mean .

I think she sings rather well for not having too much experience in either singing or gigging. Most certainly she isn't any worse than our playing, quite the contrary. Right from the start she was going to, and wanted to take singing lessons, but that isn't possible as they live in a small town and she has her own bussiness to take care of.

Recently as we have been gigging a lot (for us anyway), lots of people have commented and complained about her singing to me, comparing it to mine etc. I have been really defensive about that and the people have noticed that too as my general appearance doesn't improve when I'm intimidated .

I have been singin and playing for about 25 years on and off now (semi pro too) and I always thought that I could spot a "bad" singer, no matter what.

The bottom line is that she will stay as long as she likes to, this is a therapy band for us all, but am I still missing something here?

The rest of the band is us 3 ugly blokes and she definately improves the looks by at least 300%. That alone would be enough for me I have to admit.

Regards
Sam

PS. No pics as of yet, but those will come eventually....

[CalebWilson]

I searched very carefully and the only trace of a question (apart from the title) was "am I missing something here?"... and I don't know just what you mean by it. In answer to the title, you are not deaf (well, you know), nor are you *****whipped, but you're just looking out for the band.

If you're looking for advice on what you should do to make yourself more comfortable, I suggest you quit the band. The other boys won't be too happy about you requesting to fire a singer. They'll be upset if you leave, but if you make up a good reason, I'm sure you'll still be mates.

Perhaps a better idea would be to calmly and nicely talk to the other members of your band about what some audience members are saying about her, and perhaps suggest she learn stuff off the internet, about breathing and various techniques etc.

An even better idea would be to get her to learn an instrument. Perhaps you could teach her bass and just concentrate your own efforts on singing. But I doubt it. Maybe you could get her to do some kind of folky instrument, if that's the kind of band you are. Get her to do something other than singing. Maybe keyboards?

That's the best I got; I'm in a helping (but not necessarily helpFUL) mood tonight.

Caleb

[T-Bird]

Hi.

Thanks Caleb, really appreciated.

The well hidden question was: Am I so dazzled about her looks and persona that I can't grasp the fact that she perhaps can't sing? Even though I'm not trying to get into her pants.

Because I honestly think she can sing the material. And she has a really sweet voice and ....aarrgh .

I will try to teach her some techniques as I know how, but I'm not that great of a singer myself, and sure as hell don't feel that I am in the position to teach anyone how to sing. Nor to play for that matter.

As said, this is a therapy band for "old" farts who, for various reasons, wouldn't be able to gig otherwise. So I don't see anyone quitting or anyone getting fired.

BTW, the genre would perhaps be "biker rock" for the lack of a better word.

Regards
Sam

[rrohde]

Infatuation does that to you, ya know?

[T-Bird]

Hi.

Yes I know it does, but I think it's not that. Is it?

Regards
Sam

[phatbass]

If the band is happy with her, FTW.

Having said that, have they pointed out specific problems? e.g. Pitching, tone, range? Is there any way you can get someone whose musical opinion you value to have a listen?

One possibility is that her singing is too sweet for your target audience. If the material is more "raunchy mama" stuff a la Janis Joplin, Etta James, Katy Webster, etc., she may just be unsuitable.

I'd suggest maybe posting a clip or two here, but I know some singers are very self-conscious about their stuff being put out for general critiquing.

[tycobb73]

I'd say it depends on who is saying it. We had one bar that fired us because they said they didn't like our singers voice. I think maybe its because we were the first band to ever play there and the first time we went there we packed the place. So he booked us every other weekend and people got tired of us. This is the only place that's complained about our singer so we don't give it much thought. On the other hand if you're hearing it from multiple venues I'd be concerned.

[grovest]

Make a recording and review it dispassionately, maybe with a friend or 'music mentor' you have that doesn't have personal connections to your band (other than to you, maybe). Or better yet, share it with us.

[denhou1974]

I experienced a similair situation. We had a decent singer with good stage presence. Two guys in the band complained about her pitch (they were perfectionists) but never offered to help her. Audience loved her and we were always booked so I ignored the band and kept booking gigs.

[ThunderLizard]

T-Bird-
You're Whipped....but then we all are. So's every guy in the bar with eyesight.

[LaughingGroove]

Post her picture and we will let you know if she has a good voice or not. j/k lol

[azureblue]

Christina / Brittney disease. It can be cured by listening to Billie Holiday, Ella, Sarah Vaughn, etc. And judging with yours ears, not eyes. :-)

[MatticusMania]

I'll say this...

I was jamming with a band that was fronted by a cute lead singer.

I'll even go so far as to say there was a slight infatuation, slight.

Still, it was pretty clear to me that she couldnt sing.

So, my answer is no, youre not *****whipped, but maybe its time for a checkup with the ear doctor? That or people just dont know what theyre talking about anymore.

[ErebusBass]

Do you have a recording? Perhaps if you could listen to her without watching her sing in that tiny little tube top that her naughty bits are poking out of, it would be easier to tell if she can actually sing or not.

[scottbass]

How the heck can we help you judge whether or not she's a good singer when you haven't posted her picture(s)???

[T-Bird]

Hi.

The pics will come, don't worry .

A music pro will most probably tell us all to sell our instruments and start collecting stamps or something similar (no offense to the stamp collectors ), so seeking pro advice wouldn't probably help that much.

Some of the tunes are in a bit difficult key to her and we've been transposing them to the best of our abilities. Also some of the tunes are originally sung by males, and that may sound a bit strange to some. Perhaps the "uneducated" audience sees that as poor singing?

To be absolutely honest with You, our previous singer (male) got much more critisisim about his voice/pitch etc. so in that way it's an improvement .

We have two very different gigs coming up in the next three weeks, perhaps then I can get some unbiased opinions from the folks in the audience.

The biggest problem may well be that they're comparing her, with a bit over a year of experience in singing and gigging to me, with 25 years of experience in music biz in general. But I can't sing either, I spent 7 years being told that by my ex .

Seems that this weekends rehearsal is off as the guitarist has to be somewhere else, so the planned photo and video download is unfortunately most likely off too, so You guys just have to wait for the proof that she even exists .

Regards
Sam

[Deacon_Blues]

I'm with phatbass on this. It's hard to tell what the problem is if you don't get any other feedback than that they don't like her singing.

I put my two cents on that people question her suitability in the band, rather than telling that she's singing out of tune or something. What kind of voice does she have and what kind of music do you play? Are they a good match? Also, how much energy and emotion does she sing with?

[Jake of Bass]

Yeah, agreed with phatbass too.

Also, try seeing her with a different perception, say "hmm if I was female and an audience member, would I still like her singing?". Separating her appearance and what it does to you (we've all been there ) from her musical ability is the only way you're really going to answer this question for yourself. I've seen and played in bands with "hot chicks" who lacked stage presence or any passion in their voice, and played with ladies who whilst not be "hot" per se can really belt out a song and get everyone in the place if not dancing, at the very least eyes on the stage, heads nodding and feet tapping along to the music. And then of course I've had the best of both worlds...

Attractiveness is all relative too. Certainly there are women who more people than not think are hot, but you'll always find some that don't, and vice versa. That goes for singing too (some people's voices I can't abide yet others love them) but if there is a problem with the way she's delivering the songs it would be something to (kindly) pull her up on and offer some suggestions. If it's you just feeling slightly infatuated and slightly put out at the same time, that's an emotional issue to deal with - try to have your "professional hat" on at all times when doing anything band related.

[DWBass]

Pics and soundclips please.

[rokkitt]

is she any one of these young ladies......maybe?