Am I overreacting?(Thinking about quiting)

Sausainis · #1 02-17-2013, 01:27 PM

I am in DIO/Rainbow/Black sabbath cover band with some musicly awesome and experienced people: while i play for 3years, they do it for 10+. Got hell a lot of good things to learn from them.
Band had a really slow start, long forming period(after six months guitar player and violins+alt(these girls where to play key parts...Not my idea) left) so in a year we had 4 gigs. Good ones, got some money and things seem to go faster now. Plus no free gigs and we usually bring crowd of ~100, which in my book is a lot. BUT here is something that kills me:
1. Organizational skills: we have 2-3 rehersals a week, tho we play same old songs. Pretty much no movement forward. However, at this moment I can live with that. What kills me: these rehersals do not have schedule - whenever BL feels like it he sets date. No pattern at all. Am I asking for 2 evenings, which ever day - dont case, but he doesnt agree to that. This litteraly means that i have to give up on to some part on family/girlfriend or carrier.
2. Little things, but still: drummer does not say hi to me(tho that can be atributet to his somewhat neurotic personality traits); BL makes all of decisions and is stubborn as hell; when we got gig our "extra" band members become BLs wife, driver & sound guy. All but sound guy play minimal role and when we travel in very small car should not come - but because BL wants, we have to take two cars which are so full that you can barely move.

Right now I am rather pissed off so not making any decisions yet and still trying to talk to them for last time - saying it is extremly important for me to have a decent working shedule, but if I hear no again, should I leave?

Kmonk · #2 02-17-2013, 01:31 PM

Sounds like you need to have a band meeting. You should insist on scheduled rehearsals and ask what the short and long term plans are going be. Why should be expected to change your plans whenever the BL feels like rehearsing?

Sausainis · #3 02-17-2013, 02:03 PM

I am insisting on scheduled rehearsals for quite a while. For last few weeks they decide on rehearsals when I am not around. Today i missed out rehearsal only because I was informed about it when BL was already driving to it...

volerium · #4 02-17-2013, 02:11 PM

I'd have a talk with the entire band. A sit down or whatever to give it one last effort. If they can make it so times are scheduled from now on, then you can deal with their other personalities/oddities, whatever. But if they're uncompromising, I'd walk. Sounds like you'll be missing out on a pretty cool band musically but if its making you mad like this, not even worth it. Just my two cents. Music can be a lot of fun with the right people and it can be a chore from hell with the wrong ones

Sausainis · #5 02-17-2013, 02:18 PM

I guess I'll go with your plan volerium, thanks

JohnMCA72 · #6 02-17-2013, 09:39 PM

Ignoring your (quite reasonable) requests for some sort of predictable schedule is disrespectful, if not plain bad business. That, plus no progress musically & a band leader who calls all the shots. I hope you're getting paid a nice salary to compensate for putting up with all that.

bassbully · #7 02-18-2013, 12:34 PM

That practice shedule alone would be enough for me to walk. IMO if the band is tight and you are not doing new material you do not need to practice that much. As for the flaky band members? Like we say around here the hang with other ina band is allot of times the biggest make or break deal.

Tituscrow · #8 02-18-2013, 01:10 PM

Lithuanian Sabbath cover band. Awesome

**baba** · #9 02-18-2013, 01:56 PM

Three rehearsals a week for a cover band?! If everyone can play and does their homework, you should never need more than one rehearsal per week. Pick a weekly day/time that works for all and everyone can shed the songs on their own time as needed.

HolmeBass · #10 02-18-2013, 02:01 PM

I personally could not deal with that, but maybe in Lithuania there aren't too many Dio/Sabbath cover bands to choose from.

Mushroo · #11 02-18-2013, 02:02 PM

After 3 years (and 10 years for them) you should be able to just show up and do the gig. Would that solve the problem for you right there?

Richland123 · #12 02-18-2013, 04:17 PM

Unless you have a burning desire to play nothing but Dio/Rainbow/Black Sabbath songs, I would leave and look for a band with people who want to act more serious and professional.

ma4rk · #13 02-18-2013, 04:17 PM

You said you've gained a lot from playing with people more experienced than you which is great, however with these frustrations you're experiencing it's time to take what you've learnt from them & apply it with a new band that is more organised to your liking. I wouldn't count on a band meeting working out as it sounds like they're very much set in their ways.

EvanF1322 · #14 02-18-2013, 09:02 PM

Maybe a good talking in order, if nothing changes then **** em and quit.. There's probably a good reason they've been playing for 10+ years and still only play in a cover band, and want to take control and ******** around.... Join/start a band with original music

Sausainis · #15 02-19-2013, 01:46 AM

Ech, tried talking to them via facebook, most likely will try again tomorrow during rehearsals, but i guess it is time fpr me to leave...

ajb · #16 02-19-2013, 12:23 PM

For god's sake yes, leave.

jmattbassplaya · #17 02-19-2013, 12:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sausainis

I am insisting on scheduled rehearsals for quite a while. For last few weeks they decide on rehearsals when I am not around. Today i missed out rehearsal only because I was informed about it when BL was already driving to it...

I had that issue with a past band I was in. I ended up quitting, and that band died soon after. Apparently they couldn't find a bassist who was willing to put up with that kind of thing much longer than I was.