Band Member Pointing Out Mistakes to the Audienc - Page 3

MouseRat · #41 12-02-2012, 05:14 PM

IMO, your band is probably at a crossroads. Pro bands/successful bands don't allow what you guitar player did - amateur bands do. Nothing wrong with being one of those bands. A lot of folks play out for fun, only book smallish clubs, and don't make a ton of cashola. So choose your own adventure, right? - Causal, low-key bar band, or high-paying rock-god powerhowse with glitter-chested fans and dressing rooms.

kurosawa · #42 12-02-2012, 05:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by gjbassist

Also he is really not replaceable.

Anyone can be replaced. By a vacancy, if necessary.

1958Bassman · #43 12-02-2012, 05:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by gjbassist

Probably should clarify a couple of things. First, the band member who made the comments was not singling out any one person in the band. He was commenting on the band as a whole. Also he is really not replaceable. He and the guitar player are the two original members of the band. He is a fantastic harmonica player and he is also the one who booked this gig. He does have high standards and wants to put on a good show. I do too, but we are not perfect and we are going to make mistakes! I just don't think it's smart business for him to point them out to people outside the band. I just need to find a tactful way to tell him this.

Next time you get together as a band, take a vote- "Everyone who thinks nothing should be said to the audience about mistakes, raise your hand" and then, "Everyone who thinks the person who apologized for the mistakes made on that night was wrong for doing it, raise your hand" followed by "Everyone who thinks the guy who posted that we sucked on Facebook should have their butt handed to them, raise your hand".

bluewine · #44 12-02-2012, 05:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kurosawa

Anyone can be replaced. By a vacancy, if necessary.

+1

Blue

bluewine · #45 12-02-2012, 05:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MouseRat

So choose your own adventure, right? - Causal, low-key bar band, or high-paying rock-god powerhowse with glitter-chested fans and dressing rooms.

I see where your coming from, but understand everyone does not have the ability to play in pro bands. Some only have the abilities to play in the "just for fun" gig 6-8 times a year for friends and family type bands.

As you said nothing wrong with either.

Blue

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derrico1 · #46 12-02-2012, 05:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kurosawa

Anyone can be replaced. By a vacancy, if necessary.

+1. The harp player is irreplaceable?

"You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means."

Sgt. Rock · #47 12-02-2012, 05:59 PM

As a general rule, artistic types tend to haul some emotional baggage around with them. We tend to be thin-skinned, fragile people, and almost universally our Achilles heel is our inability to deal with confrontation. It sure sounds like this guy matches that profile. His way of expressing frustration was classic passive-aggressive behavior: indirectly criticize someone in public, instead of face to face, while simultaneously stirring up drama. Yes, totally unprofessional and unacceptable.

If this was my band I would sit him down and let him know that if he ever did anything like this again he would be canned on the spot. If by some cosmically odd turn I found myself working for some peckerhead who did this, I would have the same conversation, only instead of firing him, I would find another gig.

No one is "unfireable". If David Lee Roth can get sacked, so can this guy. Remind him of this.

gjbassist · #48 12-02-2012, 07:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by derrico1

+1. The harp player is irreplaceable?

"You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means."

OK, so he is not irreplaceable. IMO it would be very difficult to get the other two guys to go along with kicking him out of the band though. Unless they feel as strongly about this as I do I just don't see them going for that. I would like to discuss it with everyone in the band and get a general consensus. We have rehearsal on Thursday and a gig this coming Saturday. I am going to bring it up at the rehearsal so we can hopefully avoid it happening again at the gig. If it does then I'm really not sure what I will do.

derrico1 · #49 12-02-2012, 08:18 PM

I'm mostly just goofing that in terms of regularly drawing frenzied crowds of dancing women, harp players have a very selective appeal.

Still, I definitely would *not* recommend lobbying to kick the guy out; talking it through with the band is the way to go. Just explain that his bad-mouthing undercuts the band's efforts to promote itself and to build a buzz.

MarkMgibson · #50 12-02-2012, 08:43 PM

The guy made a mistake for sure, but I wouldn't kick him out for it. It sounds like he genuinely thought the gig wasn't very good, and felt bad about it. If I (or someone else) makes a very obvious mistake during a song, we might joke about it to the audience (I knew I shouldn't have given up drinking!) that sort of thing (yeah, not very clever, I know). Mentioning it to the management though, that's amateur hour stuff. Just make sure it never happens again.

The best bands in the world have off days, but damned if you should advertise the fact.

two fingers · #51 12-02-2012, 08:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by gjbassist

OK, so he is not irreplaceable. IMO it would be very difficult to get the other two guys to go along with kicking him out of the band though. Unless they feel as strongly about this as I do I just don't see them going for that. I would like to discuss it with everyone in the band and get a general consensus. We have rehearsal on Thursday and a gig this coming Saturday. I am going to bring it up at the rehearsal so we can hopefully avoid it happening again at the gig. If it does then I'm really not sure what I will do.

We didn't say the guy should be kicked out automatically. He should just be kicked in the head if he ever does it again. Most one-time offenses can be overlooked, especially if the guy comes around to reason and logic. But if he does it again, it simply has to stop....... one way or another. What he did was unacceptable stupid behavior and served no purpose other than to satisfy some need in him to beat himself up.

BassNeo · #52 12-02-2012, 08:54 PM

I really don't like to jump on the 'fire his sorry cornhole' right away. Sometimes people have bad nights and cross a line. Anyone not willing to admit that is lying to themselves.

I figured the 'irreplaceable' comment meant that he either has a leading place in the band, or the other members won't back the OP in ousting him at the moment. I do think that if everyone else agrees that his actions were uncalled for they will back him in bringing it to light. In many cases this is enough for the offender to keep his or her mouth shut next time.

If not, then you start making motions to the axe closet. Having a caustic member who belittles the rest of the band is in it only for themselves and will bail on you first chance they get. They think you suck anyway.

Munjibunga · #53 12-03-2012, 12:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BassNeo

I figured the 'irreplaceable' comment meant that he either has a leading place in the band, or the other members won't back the OP in ousting him at the moment.

... or he owns the PA.

MysticMichael · #54 12-03-2012, 01:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by gjbassist

Who else has had this issue and what is the best way to deal with it?

No better way to deal with it than directly - and forcefully.

You tell the offender in no uncertain terms that what he did is astonishingly unprofessional, and completely unacceptable. You then make it clear to him that it's not to happen again - not ever, under any circumstances.

If that doesn't work, then I have no further answers for you.

Good grief. Whatever happened to common sense?

MM

kurosawa · #55 12-03-2012, 01:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Munjibunga

... or he owns the PA.

Hahaha! That was my first thought. Had to strongly stifle it!

MarkMgibson · #56 12-03-2012, 01:13 AM

Just tell him, "never ****ing do that again". Really good harp players are few and far between, so I hope he gets the message.

kurosawa · #57 12-03-2012, 01:15 AM

Maybe when it gets to the point of talking about it, you either have to live with it or split from it. There would seem to be no teaching someone respect for listeners or fellow musicians. If he felt enough pressure from everyone, he could fake it, but then it would come bursting out at the worst possible moment. By the time you're an adult, either you feel other people or you don't, and there's no changing that. If you're able to overlook that and just play and improve your music and get paid and go home, good. If not, well maybe it's like a woman. Every other woman sees you out with her and even if she's the worst thing in the world, they'll be too polite to say anything, and you're already taken, so they won't approach you. If it's time to go, you might find other bands were waiting for that to happen. But it's something where either you have to or you don't, and if you have to, maybe better earlier than later.

MysticMichael · #58 12-03-2012, 01:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MouseRat

IMO, your band is probably at a crossroads. Pro bands/successful bands don't allow what you guitar player did - amateur bands do.

Amen. I would never put up with a stunt like that happening a second time. Never ever ever...

MM

bassbully · #59 12-03-2012, 08:56 AM

Tell him to shut his mouth and play.

jungleheat · #60 12-03-2012, 09:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by the yeti

any time you feel you don't have power you are powerless. if you are powerless you're better off not worrying about it. the powerless don't solve problems.

Easy solution to that one. Don't feel powerless. Then by your own logic you will have power. Then do what needs to be done to solve the problem.

At the very least, as a last resort, he could simply quit the band. That may or may not make the guy change his behaviour, but at any rate it won't be the OP's problem any more.

Quote:

Originally Posted by kurosawa

Anyone can be replaced. By a vacancy, if necessary.

Especially a HARMONICA player! I mean, unless you are playing "the music of Toots Thielmans" or something, a harmonica player causing trouble should get the boot faster than it takes to play an 8th note rest.

Quote:

Originally Posted by derrico1

+1. The harp player is irreplaceable?

"You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means."

I know, right! LOL.

But my suggestion for a course of action is to bring it up at a band meeting/practice, let the guy know that pointing out all minor mistakes to the public is not cool and that it needs to stop (try to leave what might happen up to his imagination for now, no need making threats of quitting or firing him if it's not necessary).