Cheating on the band!?!?

[Spinal Tapper]

First a little background: This good friend of mine from my work has an arsenal of vintage gear. Amps, guitars, drums, synths, pedals - everything analog. Really cool stuff. He's about 35 and plays out once in a while, originals and covers (a lot of old school Dylan/Who/Hendrixy type stuff - I know that's a pretty vague description). We jam once every month or so at his rehearsal space (which happens to be in the basement of where we work) with a drummer friend of mine and he lets me use his '66 Fender Jazz - he also has an identical matching Fender P bass - but he's not just a gear whore, he's a great musician.

Anyways, he asked me and my drummer friend if we wanted to play a show at a very reputable venue/bar. Just the 3 of us. 10-12 song set - all originals, maybe one cover. The problem is, I don't know ANY of his songs...and it's 4 weeks away.

I would have to miss a practice with my real band to play the show, not to mention the time I would have to spend practicing to get confident playing his tunes - which probably aren't too complicated. Should my band respect me for taking this gig, or am I just doing it for the glory of manhandling killer vintage bass? Should I even tell my band??? Any advice from my fellow TBers???

[bassman1185]

Well, if you're going to be missing practices, the other guys have a right to know what's going on. I would run it by them and see what they think. If they're cool with not having you at practice, it shouldn't be an issue. If they do make a stink about it, I guess you'll just have to decide which project you want to do more.

[Chebass88]

I would tell your other band mates that you had a commitment come up, and that you can't make the rehearsal. You'd like to reschedule it at their convenience. You don't have to mention WHY you can't make rehearsal - frankly, it isn't any of their business!

imp.

[TheDarkReaver]

just tell them you want to do this show with your friend and that you'll miss a practice, come on, it's not really rocket science.

i'm starting to think i'm in the minority when it comes to actually having some kind of friendship with my bandmates and actually talking to them.

[Drifta]

Originally Posted by TheDarkReaver

just tell them you want to do this show with your friend and that you'll miss a practice, come on, it's not really rocket science.

i'm starting to think i'm in the minority when it comes to actually having some kind of friendship with my bandmates and actually talking to them.

Wow, +1 to both things.


tell your band to come check it out and have a beer. Or instead of having practice, try to see if your band wants to open or if your friend wants to open, and you play 2 sets with both, best of both worlds!

[Thangfish]

Warren Haynes has a band called Gov't Mule.
Also guitarist and vocalist for The Allman Bros.
... Phill Lesh and Friends,
... The Dead,
plus solo stuff.

Cheating?
Tell the guys what's up.
I'm sure none of them have EVER missed a rehearsal, anyway.

Then after you get this guys material, you can gig with him when your main project isn't playing, without such a big effort next time.
Heck, maybe even support your main project sometime.
It can't do anything except make you better... right?

[CHILDISHGAMBINO]

You should do the show and tell your band. You're only going to miss a practice you might even be able to reschedule it. I don't see why anyone would get their panties in a bunch over it. Lots of musicians are in more than one band. It can be a lot fun to have two totally different outlets. 4 weeks isn't that long but you're writing the bass lines so you can make that as simple or as complicated as you want. Sounds like a fun project.

[Kael]

I fail to see a problem here.

Gigs = Money.

Rehearsals = No Money.

Gigs trump rehearsals every time. Period. While I'd try to avoid leaving people out in the cold completely, I'm going to take a show over a rehearsal every time.

Well, unless you are fortunate enough to be a hired gun where you get paid for each rehearsal that is.

[IanStephenson]

Go for it. Shouldn't be a problem.

Explain the situation, and make sure everyone is clear that the side project doesn't mess with the main gig. Everyone in my band does the odd gig on the side - it keeps us sharp. They're fun, and bring in a bit of cash. If possible we all go out watch the other guys - it's fun seeing your band mates playing different stuff. We even set each other up with gigs - whats good for my band mates is good for my band.

We all know that "the band" is the one that we're commited to. No jealousy...

Ian

[David1234]

I think you should be able to tell your band mates you want to do it then ask if it's okay that you're messing with their rehearsal time / weekly schedule. They should actually want you to do the gig. It's not cheating if they support it.

It would be cheating if you lied about it though. So don't! Be open and always honest, and encourage them to be the same. I sure hope you enjoy the gig, too!

[phat daddy]

As musicians and as professionals we owe it to ourselves to branch out in as many multiple projects as time allows. If your band acts like a jealous wife, they're the ones who aren't being professionals. And yes, a show trumps a rehearsal at any given time. I rarely play in only one project, and I've been a gigging pro for over 12 years. There are so many different avenues to explore, how are we to grow at an acceptable rate to ourselves if we don't take every decent opportunity to play? My advice-- keep a good calendar, be open with ALL your bandmates, play as much as possible, and have a great time.

[derrico1]

• +1 to the tell-your-bandmates crowd.
• A set shouldn't take as much time to learn as you seem to be fearing. If you're concerned, ask your friend if he's got lead sheets to help cut your practice time.
• At the show, it would be cool if your friend would thank your band on-mic for loaning you out for the night. That little gesture will help calm them down, and it's free PR for your band. Ask your pal to do this for you when you accept the gig.

[scottbass]

Originally Posted by derrico1

• +1 to the tell-your-bandmates crowd.
• A set shouldn't take as much time to learn as you seem to be fearing. If you're concerned, ask your friend if he's got lead sheets to help cut your practice time.
• At the show, it would be cool if your friend would thank your band on-mic for loaning you out for the night. That little gesture will help calm them down, and it's free PR for your band. Ask your pal to do this for you when you accept the gig.

+1 to all this stuff.

Being jealous over you playing in another band = scared the other band will "steal you away" = high school garage band mentality. Believe it or not, some so-called adults still operate in this mode. Their problem, not yours.

[Matt R.]

Originally Posted by Spinal Tapper

First a little background: This good friend of mine from my work has an arsenal of vintage gear. Amps, guitars, drums, synths, pedals - everything analog. Really cool stuff. He's about 35 and plays out once in a while, originals and covers (a lot of old school Dylan/Who/Hendrixy type stuff - I know that's a pretty vague description). We jam once every month or so at his rehearsal space (which happens to be in the basement of where we work) with a drummer friend of mine and he lets me use his '66 Fender Jazz - he also has an identical matching Fender P bass - but he's not just a gear whore, he's a great musician.

Anyways, he asked me and my drummer friend if we wanted to play a show at a very reputable venue/bar. Just the 3 of us. 10-12 song set - all originals, maybe one cover. The problem is, I don't know ANY of his songs...and it's 4 weeks away.

I would have to miss a practice with my real band to play the show, not to mention the time I would have to spend practicing to get confident playing his tunes - which probably aren't too complicated. Should my band respect me for taking this gig, or am I just doing it for the glory of manhandling killer vintage bass? Should I even tell my band??? Any advice from my fellow TBers???

You're a musician. Play music dammit. Schedule everything respectfully with your main band/gig/whatever. Music isn't monogamous, and if your main band isn't cool with it, screw them. Go play and get paid. Just don't douche your bandmates and be honest. Best of luck

[KBarker]

The truth is what you need to tell your regular bandmates...if they are really into being musicians, they'll be just as excited as you.

[Spinal Tapper]

Thanks for all the input. I guess it's a no-brainer, but I just wanted to see if anyone here thought I was an @$$hole for doing the gig. Good lookin' out!

[Entre Nous 2007]

i still think you're what you just called yourself...







i kid.
because i love.