I got just kicked out of my first band

Lowner · #1 05-13-2006, 02:47 PM

The drummer could not keep timea and was too fast but I got blamed for being the one who could not keep time. I was in the band for almost a week and we had 3 practices. I told the drummer he was too fast and the guitar player stuck up for him everytime . I got a call this afternoon and they said dont bother coming to practice, I am out of the band.

i am discouraged now. I had so much trouble finding a band and when I did find one I get kicked out and blamed for something that I did not do. I just want to find a band where we all get along, no one minds that I am a woman bass player, no one hates my gear and the members can play in time.

ebe9 · #2 05-13-2006, 03:06 PM

Their loss.

Have they had a history of booting the bassit? Basically sounds like they are a pretty tight friendship group and not prepared to accept the fact that the problem is internal when it would be easier to blame it on the "new guy".

Treat it as a learning experience and move on. Obviously its hard not to get discouraged, but if the problem was honestly on their side then what do you have to worry about?

tZer · #3 05-13-2006, 03:06 PM

Don't be discouraged. You may want to take a less vocal approach to your participation when you are new, however. Sometimes you need to just ride along for a while and let these things sort themselves out. If they look at you and say, "You are rushing" or "You are dragging" - Tell them you will try to fix it. If it is not your fault and the drummer really can't hold the groove AND the rest of the band is in denial about that, then there is really nothing you can do. And really... do you want to be in a band with that sort of dysfunction anyway?

What they will find very quickly is that for some crazy reason every bass player they play with will have time issues - or in other words, until they accept that there is another cause of their temporal anomalies, they will continue to experience them ad inf.

I think you are better off finding another gig. Just remember, until you are a 'vested' member, try to stay low on the controversial comments meter.

canopener · #4 05-13-2006, 03:16 PM

Kicked you out after three practices? Sounds like you'd be better off without the impatient goofs anyway.

Marcus · #5 05-13-2006, 03:16 PM

Pfft, it's not you that sucks, it was the drummer, be happy

**cheezewiz** · #6 05-13-2006, 03:18 PM

Learn how to play in time, and you'll be fine. I'd suggest a metronome.

freeslicefattyj · #7 05-13-2006, 03:59 PM

If I was trying out for a band that would do that, I probably would have left before having given them a chance to do it. Sounds to me like you're better off without that group. I'm sure the people you are looking for are out there looking for you, you'll find something that fits your fancy.

jwl · #8 05-13-2006, 06:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lowner

The drummer could not keep timea and was too fast but I got blamed for being the one who could not keep time. I was in the band for almost a week and we had 3 practices. I told the drummer he was too fast and the guitar player stuck up for him everytime . I got a call this afternoon and they said dont bother coming to practice, I am out of the band.

i am discouraged now. I had so much trouble finding a band and when I did find one I get kicked out and blamed for something that I did not do. I just want to find a band where we all get along, no one minds that I am a woman bass player, no one hates my gear and the members can play in time.

it doesn't matter where you are now. all that matters is where you are going. everyone here gave you good advice. listen to what they said and act upon it. above all, don't be discouraged. you're going to be a great bassist. peace, jeff

Lowner · #9 05-13-2006, 06:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ebe9

Their loss.

Have they had a history of booting the bassit? Basically sounds like they are a pretty tight friendship group and not prepared to accept the fact that the problem is internal when it would be easier to blame it on the "new guy".

Treat it as a learning experience and move on. Obviously its hard not to get discouraged, but if the problem was honestly on their side then what do you have to worry about?

No the guitar player and the drummer were friends and would jam together sometimes. They decided to look for a bass player and form a band. They wanted to gig on weekends at bars in our area. So it really wasn't a band at first until they took on me as bass player.

jmarcus2 · #10 05-13-2006, 06:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cheezewiz

Learn how to play in time, and you'll be fine. I'd suggest a metronome.

+1

mark roberts · #11 05-13-2006, 06:37 PM

Try not to be discouraged. Work on your chops at practice, with a drum machine so work is "in-time". Right now the pecking order might be siding with keeping the drummer...but, I can tell you that once drummers have a bit of experience, they are the faster flyers from bands...they always think "the grass is greener" and figure they will have a gig no matter what. Bassists are next on the want list. Why?...a bassist is a foundation, but it is not a glamorous position in the band (except for bands that are constructed around a non-traditional bassist)...so, not a lot of people are drawn to it. Especially early on when they play through anemic equipment. Stick with it long enough, get your chops and timing down, then do the research on how to get "the power" via the right preamp, tons of power (seriously, wattage in the thousands makes things right) and the right speakers, how to control it all and then you will understand (and so will they) what playing the BASS is all about. Good luck to you.

lpdeluxe · #12 05-13-2006, 07:11 PM

Stick with it. If you are good, other bands will come calling. Bass players are always in demand (I'm speaking as an accomplished Dobro/harmonica/electric g**tar player who is currently playing bass full time).

Don't be discouraged. Their problems remain their problems. Keep the thump!

Crazyeelboy · #13 05-14-2006, 02:30 PM

Sorry to hear about it, but if they are dweebs, you are better off without them. That said, though, you should take the timing comment seriously - make sure you develop your sense of time - many young players neglect this, but you must master your timing. By the way, especially with less experienced players, drummers are notoriously unreliable time keepers (ironically) and guitarists are even worse (not ironically).

Keep with it, get your timing down right and find another band. Finally, as much as it will hurt your ego, you should make sure you leave the band on good terms with the other members - you never know when you will bump into them again.

QORC · #14 05-16-2006, 12:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lowner

The drummer could not keep timea and was too fast but I got blamed for being the one who could not keep time. I was in the band for almost a week and we had 3 practices. I told the drummer he was too fast and the guitar player stuck up for him everytime . I got a call this afternoon and they said dont bother coming to practice, I am out of the band.

i am discouraged now. I had so much trouble finding a band and when I did find one I get kicked out and blamed for something that I did not do. I just want to find a band where we all get along, no one minds that I am a woman bass player, no one hates my gear and the members can play in time.

in the band one week? you were hardly IN, my friend. It's just like going on a couple of dates with a woman and realizing it ain't happening.

There can't be THAT much sting to this -- it's not like you were playing with them for 3 years! It just wasn't a good fit...just move on. Better that you found out now instead of 6 months from now.

MJ5150 · #15 05-16-2006, 12:27 PM

If it truly was the drummer, then you don't want to play in a band that can't keep time.

-Mike

bstringrandy · #16 05-17-2006, 08:00 AM

Easier said than done, but chalk it up to experience and move on.

I find it interesting that they were willing to toss you out rather than trying to get to the root of the problem and resolve it. Bass players don't grow on trees and they should've been willing to work through it with you. They won't get far with that attitude. It sounds like you are better off not being involved with such close-minded players.

Keep woodshedding, put out the feelers, and another gig will come along. Remember to be supportative to the group and be the glue that binds all that other noise together into music!

bassbully43 · #17 05-17-2006, 08:22 AM

Dumb question... how will she improve by using a metronome if the drummer had bad timing? Bad timing is that bad timing..if yours as a bassist (timing) is good or the bands is good and the drummer sucks you have a bad drummer...no metronome will improve that. If you have bad timing (bassist) i see your point or am i confused? I think the drummer needs the metronome

Thunder Lizard · #18 05-17-2006, 09:57 AM

OLD trick here...... if ever you find yourself in that situation, a great way to make sure that you ARE on time, and also to show the drummer that he's NOT, is to bring said metronome to practice, (I'd recommend an electronic one that could be amplified if need be) and say "geez, guys, I really want to make sure I'm in the groove, here, Mr. Drummer, set the tempo you think we should be at, and that will help me". You're NOT being an a**, you're bringing the correct tool for the job to fix what they're saying is wrong. Letting the drummer set the speed ensures that they can't say you "did it wrong".
About 5 minutes later, one of several things will have happened....
A- you'll find out that somehow, someway, you WERE being pushed off course, and the metronome has helped fix it, or at least shown that there is a problem.
B- The drummer will have realized that HE was off course, and the metronome should have done it's job again.
C- You and the drummer will realize that the guitarist is the one dragging you both off of the marked path... by the way, I wouldn't be surprised if that was it... and he'll say that the metronome wasn't made by Marshall, or made for a Les Paul, and you and the drummer can shake your heads and keep on playing it right, and wait for him to catch up.
D- You'll know for absolute certain that the drummer has a sense of time like an epileptic woodpecker, and you can either offer to loan the metronome to him, or thank them kindly for the opportunity as you pack up your gear.....having been proved RIGHT that the guy's meter is bad.
BUT, in no way should you look bad. You made an attempt to fix the problem, brought the tool to help find out what was the problem, and if life's fair *but it's not* you may have found a fix.
Or you have a nice metronome to practice with, and it will always bug them that they know they need one, but are too silly in the head to admit it.
Man, it worked for me..... my one guitarist, years ago, swore that I was dropping the groove, and frankly, I thought he was right, and couldn't figure out how to fix it. He brought in a metronome to help me out........... and we discovered that the drummer was actually counting wrong, and the other guys were just really good at following him. Five minutes later, the song was working. If a band is really concerned about doing it right, doing something like that is a simple, reliable way of fixing the problem. Years later, we got a keys guy who believed in it, and programmed his metronome for every song in practice...if we started to wander, he'd kick it on, and we'd all go "OOOH, ok" and be back on track.
Best of luck, man..... you care about your gig, obviously..hopefully you'll find some people who appreciate that integrity.

fr0me0 · #19 05-17-2006, 10:12 AM

whenever there is a timing issue it goes straight to the metronome. Metronome is the judge jury and executioner when it comes to timing.

Blueszilla · #20 05-17-2006, 10:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lowner

I just want to find a band where we all get along, no one minds that I am a 'insert discriminated against demographic type of your choice here' bass player, no one hates my gear and the members can play in time.

It is a quest...