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02-06-2013, 11:23 AM
| | | | I might have poached a gig from a fellow bass brotha...need perspective.
Things have been going south with my current band for around 6 months now. I'll leave the drama details for some other time. So, I decided recently it's not going to get any better and it's time to move on.
Right now, I have two other bands that are interested in me. The problem I have is the one band I like the best, I've been asked to replace another bassist that I sort of know. We're not friends by any means, but run in the same musical circles. He is a really nice guy, but has issues. He's well known for going absolutely bat crap insane crazy at gigs. We're talking kicking chairs, knocking over tables, holding arms up in air and not playing for half a song, banging bass on table tops, band members looking at each other wondering what he's gonna do next type of crazy. I've been chosen over him as a sub before by one of his good friends for this same reason. I sat in for one song the other night with his band with his prior permission (none of them had heard me play before) and got called the day after by the BL. Basically they are giving him an ultimatum and want to know if I'm interested if he doesn't shape up.
Well, perspectives? |
02-06-2013, 11:31 AM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: WI | | | How old are these guys? The other bass player sounds like he's still in High School.
Blue
Last edited by bluewine : 02-06-2013 at 12:15 PM.
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02-06-2013, 11:32 AM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Aug 2008 Location: Hamburg, Germany | | | If there are any hard feelings between you two I'd say it's his problem. I assume he will be approached about his issues by the band and if he won't comply within reasonable boundaries, I have a hunch he's out anyway no matter if you joined or not (unless the band is really desperate...) Now, who fills the spot is not as important imo, he got himself in that position.
Whether he acts professionally afterwards is something else... But I wouldn't worry about it. I don't see you in the wrong here.
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02-06-2013, 11:38 AM
| | | Quote:
Originally Posted by bluewine  How old are these guys? Thus other bass player sounds like he's still in High School.
Blue | Old enough to know better Blue. At least half your age, I'd say. |
02-06-2013, 11:40 AM
| | Registered User
Endorsing artist: Lakland basses | | Join Date: Mar 2012 Location: Chicago | | | Judging from your description he sounds like a complete nut job. And not in the good way.
Proceed with caution. |
02-06-2013, 11:42 AM
|  | Registered User | | | | | I got a call to sub in band of which I knew the bass player. Not friends but same as your circle. Did one show and I was offered the spot. I took it and did not ask any questions. I was told by the band that I worked hard as a sub and earned the spot. I'm not worried and will do my part to remain cordial to the original bass player. |
02-06-2013, 11:47 AM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: WI | | Quote:
Originally Posted by jonas_24112 Old enough to know better Blue. At least half your age, I'd say. | Then I think you would be doing these guys a favor coming in and getting away from his inappropriate behavior.
Blue |
02-06-2013, 11:48 AM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Anasleim, CA | | Is this the guy?   |
02-06-2013, 11:51 AM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Jun 2011 Location: Vancouver, BC | | | I fail to see the problem. The guy lost his gig because he's unstable. You happen to be the guy with an opportunity. He's losing his gig, you didn't steal it.
My only advice is make sure the guy is 100% let go before you take over. You probably don't want to be in the line of fire when he goes off. |
02-06-2013, 11:52 AM
|  | Registered User | | Join Date: Apr 2011 Location: Kirkland, WA | | Quote:
Originally Posted by jonas_24112 He is a really nice guy, but has issues. He's well known for going absolutely bat crap insane crazy at gigs. We're talking kicking chairs, knocking over tables, holding arms up in air and not playing for half a song, banging bass on table tops, band members looking at each other wondering what he's gonna do next type of crazy. | I frequently act like this on stage too. I don't see the big deal. As I tell the others in my jazz group, it's all about improvisation!  |
02-06-2013, 11:57 AM
|  | Registered User | | Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Madison, WI | | Quote:
Originally Posted by jonas_24112 Things have been going south with my current band for around 6 months now. I'll leave the drama details for some other time. So, I decided recently it's not going to get any better and it's time to move on.
Right now, I have two other bands that are interested in me. The problem I have is the one band I like the best, I've been asked to replace another bassist that I sort of know. We're not friends by any means, but run in the same musical circles. He is a really nice guy, but has issues. He's well known for going absolutely bat crap insane crazy at gigs. We're talking kicking chairs, knocking over tables, holding arms up in air and not playing for half a song, banging bass on table tops, band members looking at each other wondering what he's gonna do next type of crazy. I've been chosen over him as a sub before by one of his good friends for this same reason. I sat in for one song the other night with his band with his prior permission (none of them had heard me play before) and got called the day after by the BL. Basically they are giving him an ultimatum and want to know if I'm interested if he doesn't shape up.
Well, perspectives? | Can you blame the band for wanting to get rid of the guy? I don't care how nice you are, if you start flipping tables at our gigs, you're done. No way I would work with a guy like that. |
02-06-2013, 12:00 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Netherlands | | | Basically what muttleybass said; you aren't stealing anything and aren't backstabbing him or somesuch. He lost his spot due to his own 'issues'. And his old band offered his spot to you. It's not like you were badmouhing him behind his back or anything.
I'd say go for it, and don't feel bad. Hell, it might provide the old bassist with some realisation he's on a egocentric and antisocial path and needs to address that. Behaviour like that mostly comes back to bite him in the ass, be it in bands or in his career or lovelife of whathaveyou. |
02-06-2013, 12:13 PM
|  | Every exit is an entry somewhere else | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Northern CA. | | Quote:
Originally Posted by Muttleybass I fail to see the problem. The guy lost his gig because he's unstable. You happen to be the guy with an opportunity. He's losing his gig, you didn't steal it. | Yeah, you're not the bad guy here. Sounds like this guy was obliviously given plenty of rope and managed to hang himself. Personally, I would take the gig but make sure it's after they take care of the deed to be done. If he ever asks, simply say they called and said they needed a new bass player, and leave it at that. |
02-06-2013, 12:14 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Brookfield, CT | | | No bad on your part. As said already, the guy IS going to be replaced one way or another.
The only concern I would have is the crazy dude coming after you, which based on your description is a possibility.
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Originally Posted by Bassist4Eris My reggae skills are rudimentary enough that I just play whatever the original guy played. :) | |
02-06-2013, 12:21 PM
|  | Registered User | | Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: West Covina (LA), SoCal | | Quote:
Originally Posted by bluewine How old are these guys? The other bass player sounds like he's still in High Elementary School.
Blue | correction Quote:
Originally Posted by Muttleybass I fail to see the problem. The guy lost his gig because he's unstable. You happen to be the guy with an opportunity. He's losing his gig, you didn't steal it.
My only advice is make sure the guy is 100% let go before you take over. You probably don't want to be in the line of fire when he goes off. | This Quote:
Originally Posted by Troph I frequently act like this on stage too. I don't see the big deal. As I tell the others in my jazz group, it's all about improvisation! | 
If you flip tables and act like an ass at gigs...  Quote:
Originally Posted by dmusic148 The only concern I would have is the crazy dude coming after you, which based on your description is a possibility. | True. OP, you ma want to verify whether or not the guy youre replacing has a history of stalking and/or assault.
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02-06-2013, 12:22 PM
|  | Registered User | | Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: White Plains | | Quote:
Originally Posted by ErebusBass Can you blame the band for wanting to get rid of the guy? I don't care how nice you are, if you start flipping tables at our gigs, you're done. No way I would work with a guy like that. | +1
I'm with everyone else, the guy is/was getting the boot one way or another.
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02-06-2013, 12:28 PM
|  | Registered User | | Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: Columbia, Maryland | | Quote:
Originally Posted by dmusic148 No bad on your part. As said already, the guy IS going to be replaced one way or another. | Good point. Quote:
Originally Posted by dmusic148 The only concern I would have is the crazy dude coming after you, which based on your description is a possibility. |
I had the same thought, but I got the impression that he brings the crazy as part of his "act." |
02-06-2013, 02:57 PM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: Saint Augustine, Florida | | | If he is actually crazy, I would be worried about him going off at you. Even "nice guys" aren't so nice when they flip mentally, and it seems if he's not in control of this, he has a legitimate mental disorder. I wouldn't even want to share a room with somebody like that.
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02-06-2013, 03:16 PM
| | | Quote:
Originally Posted by bluewine How old are these guys? The other bass player sounds like he's still in High School.
Blue | Blue, repeat after me:
It's not always about age.
It's not always about age.
It's not always about age.
It's not always about age.
It's not always about age.
In my armchair therapist opinion, it sounds more like he has a mental issue rather than anything having to do with his chronological age.
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02-07-2013, 07:20 AM
| | Registered User | | Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: WI | | Quote:
Originally Posted by LiquidMidnight Blue, repeat after me:
It's not always about age.
It's not always about age.
It's not always about age.
It's not always about age.
It's not always about age.
In my armchair therapist opinion, it sounds more like he has a mental issue rather than anything having to do with his chronological age. | It's not always about age, rarely are any of theses issues about age. However, his antics remind me of the way some people behaved when I was in HS.
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