opinion-friends that start a band, gone wrong

[justbassroxx]

Hi,
Im looking for advice. I was involved in a band and in the meantim, 2 friends I have known since 1st grade started their own band. A sax player and a drummer, the drummer enlisted his cousin to play bass...so even after my band broke up it wasn't possible to included me in their band.

Fast forward and those two just complain about the other when I talk to one or the other. The sax guy and I were in concert/jazz bands all through Highschool. And us 3 all are good friends. Now the sax player wants to dissolve the band with the drummer and his cousin because the disparity in musical skilllevel has become too aggravating for him.

He has asked me to start a band. So is this like going out with a friend's ex-girlfriend?

Is there any good way of doing this and preserving the friendship?

Should it be off limits, or should the drummer understand?

Thanks!

[Jim Campbell]

Originally Posted by justbassroxx

Hi,
Im looking for advice. I was involved in a band and in the meantim, 2 friends I have known since 1st grade started their own band. A sax player and a drummer, the drummer enlisted his cousin to play bass...so even after my band broke up it wasn't possible to included me in their band.

Fast forward and those two just complain about the other when I talk to one or the other. The sax guy and I were in concert/jazz bands all through Highschool. And us 3 all are good friends. Now the sax player wants to dissolve the band with the drummer and his cousin because the disparity in musical skilllevel has become too aggravating for him.

He has asked me to start a band. So is this like going out with a friend's ex-girlfriend?

Is there any good way of doing this and preserving the friendship?

Should it be off limits, or should the drummer understand?

Thanks!

....as long as you are up front about things and don't bad mouth anyone's skills or personalities you should be ok....after you get out of school friends start to go their own ways....everyone i went to school with did not end up working for the same company....same with bands......by the time you hit 40 you probably will have lost touch with most of your school friends anyway....

[invader3k]

The important question is: Do you want to start a band with this guy or not?

[singlemalt]

Get used to this stuff, its a long way to the top if you want to rock and roll.

You probably won't date the same girl forever either.

[MalcolmAmos]

Start a band - no way. Play in a band - yep - play in two right now. One is a break away from the original. We are all good friends and all still play together in the original band.

The original band has been in existence for over 10 years. Over the years there have been some members that did not work out for one reason or the other and they are gone. Last member to leave was for health reasons, (we are all older than dirt everyone is on social security) we worked all the ego stuff out long ago.

Just be up front with everyone.

[Raymeous]

I say go for it!

However like others have said be upfront about it, and just be professional. No need to talk trash. Unfortunately the bit about people parting ways after the school years is very true. It's called life. Make the most of it.