Tips on protocol

[NS2A]

I’m 37 now. I was in “bar/party” bands 15-20 years ago, playing hair band and bar band stuff. Quit that after my last band were more interested in smoking pot than playing. Didn’t care about the pot, cared I’d show up for practice and after a song or two they retired to the couch for munchies. I had a brief stint in radio and other entertainment venues and swore off the whole deal a dozen years ago. Besides buying my “dream bass” 10 years ago and briefly playing again, I haven’t touched it until this past winter.

I put an ad on Craigslist and the jist of my ad was:
“I quit playing about 15 years ago, but picked my bass up again lately and have been having fun. I'm a bit rusty, but the feel is coming back. … Looking to get together for a jam for fun as I have a day job, family, mortgage etc. Would be fun to play out every so often, if possible, but would rather just get together for fun now.”

So, now I have a guitarist coming over tonight. This guy hasn’t played in bands since highschool, but has played and practiced the whole time he says. He says he has a good ear and “knows all the parts” to the dozen songs we agreed to go over tonight. He sounds pretty good. Confident for sure. I met another guitar player and drummer, so I asked this guitarist if they should come over. He said "it would probably be fun to have everyone there provided they also know most of the same tunes." Well, the other guys never responded now as I’m guessing they don’t know the songs.

Ok, so here’s the deal. What’s protocol on a deal like this? I mean, I put the ad out, it’s my place, so am I kind of expected to kind of lead the jam, the songs we do?

The other question is: after the jam do I be straight up and honest and ask how I did?

Man, it sounds like I’m asking for dating advice!

[sevenyearsdown]

I've done a lot of jamming/auditioning with my own bands, as well as trying out for others. You'll both pretty much know after a couple of songs whether it's got potential or not. If you guys hit it off, I'm sure you'll be talking about "when should we get together again". If you don't, then it'll be like, "well I'll give you a call".

[Jordan]

Originally Posted by sevenyearsdown

I've done a lot of jamming/auditioning with my own bands, as well as trying out for others. You'll both pretty much know after a couple of songs whether it's got potential or not. If you guys hit it off, I'm sure you'll be talking about "when should we get together again". If you don't, then it'll be like, "well I'll give you a call".

Agreed.
You'll have to use your bunny sense to determine whether you should ask how well you did or not. But if both people had fun, there's a good chance an effort will be made to get back together again. If no effort is made on either side, then move on.

[tZer]

Set a clear agenda for the jam ahead of time and let participants know that you plan to stick to the agenda - I've found most people really like feeling like someone is driving the night.

Include in your agenda the song list and stick to it. Play the song - see how it feels - see if you or anyone wants to take another run at it or move on - keep plowing through the list.

If you can, record the entire thing. Not necessarily the in-between stuff, but definitely the songs. Sometimes you can have a jam that feels sort of flat (for reasons unknown), but then you can listen to the playback and be blown away! My personal rule is don't pass judgment until you listen to the playback. I have always found that the tape don't lie.

I cannot stress enough that it is almost impossible to get a good read on the jamming when you are actually playing. Your head is too focused on your own duties to be able to be impartial. You could have a head full of clutter and be so focused on your own thing that you completely miss the fact that the quiet, understated guitar player is amazing and your impression of him will be only what you could get - which may not be accurate.

The flip side could also be true - you could all feel really great about the jam but then listen to the playback and find it was not as stellar as you thought. That's a tricky one because that usually means the chemistry was good even if the playing wasn't.

Both things can be overcome (so-so chemistry but great jamming and great chemistry but so-so jamming) - But you need to have an unbiased "ear" (the recording) to evaluate the reality of the playing.

When you hit the last song or the end time - call it. Have a little wrap-up speech ready like, "OK, great! That was cool. I'll give you a call tomorrow after I have time to consider things and let you know what's up."

Obviously, if everything is great and you want to extend the jam - grab beers after - whatever - you can always call an audible!

Good luck!

[Spinal Tapper]

I agree that someone should be leading the jam, but don't get all anal about it if things don't sound amazing right away. Especially if it's just you and guitar (no drums right?). There will be some emptiness there so really try and hold down the rhythm. I also agree w/ recording songs - sometimes things sound way better after you take a break from it and listen to it the next day. But just remember to have fun with it and drink a couple beers (if that's your thing). It's important to establish a friendly relationship right off the bat and try to make each other as comfortable as possible - it's not like you have any gigs lined up that you have to worry about.

Good luck!

[lpdeluxe]

Originally Posted by Spinal Tapper

It's important to establish a friendly relationship right off the bat and try to make each other as comfortable as possible.

Good luck!

The lead guitarist in my last band showed up for audition and told us he had not played in seven years!

Then he proceeded to blow us away, night after night, for the next year and a half. He's a guy in his late fifties and he had the kids like flies to honey around him every night in the clubs.

May all of us do the same.

[walknbluez]

Originally Posted by sevenyearsdown

I've done a lot of jamming/auditioning with my own bands, as well as trying out for others. You'll both pretty much know after a couple of songs whether it's got potential or not. If you guys hit it off, I'm sure you'll be talking about "when should we get together again". If you don't, then it'll be like, "well I'll give you a call".

I agree with the above. You'll know once you start whether you'll want to get together again.....just like dating!