The Weekend Warrior & The Part Time Job

[BayStateBass]

Actually, Blue's right.

At least in my experience. "The Hang" eventually equals "The Drama". It burns you down quickly, as I'm learning.

I am in that position now, I sorta put myself in it, and over time it's taken a toll on me.

The next time around, if there is one, will be a "Hang-Free Zone" for me.

"The Hang", IMO, is great for garage bands or jam bands. But if you plan on gigging out and getting paid, well, I'd rather not deal with it.

[bassbully]

Originally Posted by SteveHeissner

Bluewine provides an interesting perspective with... "We are not friends and we don't hang. I think it's why we get along so well and there's 0 drama." I never thought about it that way but that sort of describes my own situation. We all get along great but live far apart so don't hang out during the week. We just meet for the gig, play, and have a great time. Then we all go our separate ways until the next gig.

I think this kind of band setup works the best and it works well for me.

[bassbully]

Originally Posted by Bert Slide

LOL I just saw that old cartoon when my Daughter was in recovery after surgery. I told the wife "they don't make them like that no more" Classic!

[HolmeBass]

I have a full-time job, and play just about every weekend. I see music as a part-time job, but I find it very fulfilling on many levels. It's not about the money, but getting paid well is nice icing on the cake. So is getting the opportunity to play cool gigs and venues. But even the Saturday night at the bar gig is fun.

[ChrisB2]

Originally Posted by bassbully

The way I look at it is I expect my job (work) to pay me and support my family. I never played music to do that or did I ever expect money from music for any support.

I think 90% of us would say that, but to me, if I'm getting hired and paid, it's a job and I will approach it as a professional... how much it might or might not add to my income matters not at all.

[jaywa]

Originally Posted by bassbully

I think this kind of band setup works the best and it works well for me.

That's my deal too. A few years ago I was in a band with two guys who I considered good friends at the time... they both wound up leaving the band and one of them is still a friend but the other one I've lost touch with completely.

I'm currently splitting time between three bands, averaging 1 to 3 gigs a month with each band. There is no overlap between any of the bands, I am the only member in common. In every one of those bands I get along well with everybody while on the gig, but there isn't a single guy in any of those bands that I spend time with "off the clock". Nothing against them, it's just that I have my day job, my personal relationships (family/friends), and my music and the more I can keep each of those entities in its own box and not intermingle them, the better things work.

In other words, I'm friendly with all my bandmates (I wouldn't be spending time with them if they were d*cks)... but they're not necessarily my friends.

[bluewine]

Originally Posted by HolmeBass

I have a full-time job, and play just about every weekend. I see music as a part-time job, but I find it very fulfilling on many levels. It's not about the money, but getting paid well is nice icing on the cake. So is getting the opportunity to play cool gigs and venues. But even the Saturday night at the bar gig is fun.

If I wasn't in a club or a bar gigging playing rock, being creative with 3 other musicians on the weekends I would fall into a deep depression.

I love the interaction with other musicians when they show up to see us and talking to our fans.

blue

[jaywa]

Yeah I get cranky when I'm not gigging enough (hence currently being in 3 bands). You can ask my wife about that...

[willop]

Originally Posted by bluewine

It's amazing how different we are as musicians.

We ad new material, but for the most part I'm playing the same songs every weekend and at 60 yeras old, I love it.

blue

And that's fine - if you like that. Being a photographer I'm in a profession that's viewed as creative, artsy, etc. I do get to use my creativity but it's not quite what I thought it would be like. There's only so many ways to pose a family at a church for a wedding.

Its a lot more about selling and personality management than photography.

If I wanted to be paid to do the same thing over and over again I'd go look for work on an assembly line or as an accountant. They pay better and come with steady paychecks!

[phillybass101]

Originally Posted by DWBass

I don't mind the job part IF............there are greater rewards at the end AND.....I'm playing with good musicians who GET IT!

Right now I'm in a rut. I consider myself a really good bass player but just cannot latch onto a good gig. The band I'm in now is led by a guy with ADHD and who just has no organizational skills. He keeps recycling the same old setlists with songs we've been playing for 2 years now. He can't even remember 50% of the songs while we're gigging and is the weakest link in the band. I got nothing else going on so I just funk out when I get the chance but honestly, it's embarrasing. Oh, and the gigs pay a tank of gas money level. One place pays us 10 days later. So, no, I'm not having any fun right now.

DW. I feel your pain man. Ain't that a B???? The band I was in played a lot but the BL kept pimping us man. On top of that he was as huge DH. The worst I've ever been around it got to the point where we couldn't stand each other. Their band hasn't sounded the same since. One time I helped them out and filled in. In the middle of the song a woman walks right up to me and says you sound better than the other bass player. I said I know, started laughing and kept playing.

[jweber76]

Regarding "the hang", my band consists of me, my younger brother (we are both in our mid-30s) our friend Chris, who we have been jamming with for 15+ years, in fact my brother and I bought him his first guitar for his birthday when we were in high school! Our drummer works with my brother and over the past 3-4 years we have become pretty good friends. All that being said we all have kids, full time jobs etc. so with the exception of the occasional barbecue or family party we hardly see each other at all outside of rehearsal and gigs.
I think it has worked out well for us, when we get together to rehearse we have a chance to catch up while we warm up. This situation is certainly not the norm, I have played in bands with friends before and experienced some drama but for me the most drama always came from bands where I didn't know any of the guys before hand. These guys were never pros and there was always clashing egos... Like animals trying to establish a dominant role. I have left more that one band because head butting and p*sssing contests between other members made it down right unenjoyable.

[phillybass101]

Originally Posted by Bert Slide

I can tell right away when I see musicians on stage who are not having fun. I don't think most of the audience notices as long as they play their faves. I've seen countless whole cover bands that were technically good and great sound/mix but they just came off to me as lifeless and devoid af any soul.

The other night the band that opened for us was a 5 piece blues band. The core of the band is three guys well over 60, the frontman/guitar player, bass player and harmonica player. They play old blues standards and have been playing in the local scene for decades. I saw pure joy in their eyes and genuine smiles nonstop during their set. You could just tell they were having a blast up there playing with their friends and for their friends in the audience. They kept the dancefloor moving and the old couples in the crowd were really kicking up their heels.

The whole thing was actually very moving for me. I hope to still have the passion they do for the music and the people when I am their age.

Hey Bert, I'm 57 man and still playing and loving it despite all the negativity. It's actually liberating to be up in years and playing because you don't care any more. You're out there just having fun and getting down. At this point I could care less about becoming a star or recording artist or the baddest boy on the block or the most knowledgable. That S^%T is childs play mane!!!!

[bassbully]

Originally Posted by ChrisB2

I think 90% of us would say that, but to me, if I'm getting hired and paid, it's a job and I will approach it as a professional... how much it might or might not add to my income matters not at all.

Would you consider it work if you were hired and paid to do a porno with a hot chick?

[Bert Slide]

Originally Posted by phillybass101

Hey Bert, I'm 57 man and still playing and loving it despite all the negativity. It's actually liberating to be up in years and playing because you don't care any more. You're out there just having fun and getting down. At this point I could care less about becoming a star or recording artist or the baddest boy on the block or the most knowledgable. That S^%T is childs play mane!!!!

I hear ya philly, I'm 47 and I feel the same way. At this point in my life I could care less what anyone else thinks of me and it is very liberating to get up there and let it all hang out. I don't know what I'd do without that release. I used to get it through extreme sports but I'm getting too old for that stuff now.

[BayStateBass]

Originally Posted by Bert Slide

I hear ya philly, I'm 47 and I feel the same way. At this point in my life I could care less what anyone else thinks of me and it is very liberating to get up there and let it all hang out. I don't know what I'd do without that release. I used to get it through extreme sports but I'm getting too old for that stuff now.

I am about to turn 40 and I feel like this too. My days of comparing myself to everyone else are over. I used to go to shows and sometimes walk away thinking "that guy is so much better than me, I suck...". Then, recently, I saw a couple good shows with guys who tour and realized that I was as good as their bassists, or at the very least I could play what they were playing. And at some point, I became comfortable with what I do and how I play. I also became comfortable with the opportunities I have. Honestly, I just don't care about those competitive things anymore. I'm not great, but I'm good enough to do this at the level I do it at. And when I get to go on stage, I have a great time and I think people see that.

[ChrisB2]

Originally Posted by bassbully

Would you consider it work if you were hired and paid to do a porno with a hot chick?

LOL! Not unpleasant work, but a job? Yes.

[hrodbert696]

I would tread lightly on the "hang" dimension, as far as my own band experience is concerned. It hasn't been the central thing. To be sure, it's no fun being in a band with people you can't stand. But I came to this whole thing late, I'm not in some crew of high school buddies who have all known each other forever, and my band mates are people I only met recently simply to put a band together. As we play together and get to know each other it gets friendly and that's good, but it's not what the band is all about for me.

[bassbully]

Originally Posted by phillybass101

Hey Bert, I'm 57 man and still playing and loving it despite all the negativity. It's actually liberating to be up in years and playing because you don't care any more. You're out there just having fun and getting down. At this point I could care less about becoming a star or recording artist or the baddest boy on the block or the most knowledgable. That S^%T is childs play mane!!!!

51 here and I yam what I yam as a person and player...funny thing most people like both

[Flyingfrets]

Originally Posted by bluewine

You know I have been pushing the other side of the coin;

For me, my band has been together 7 years.I have been with them for a little over a year.

It's a 4 peice. We are not friends and we don't hang. I think it's why we get along so well and there's 0 drama.

blue

We're together 2 1/2 years (it was a startup, but everyone had 25 - 30+ years experience in bands). We're friendly, but not friends.

Our hang-time is limited to 48 - 72 hours every weekend for 8 weeks once a year + gigs.

We're spread out over 4 states and don't have the luxury of calling an unscheduled casual rehearsal when the mood strikes. Though we knock back a few beers in the evenings, those weekends are something akin to bootcamp. We literally live together for those 2 - 3 days and the conversation is 98% music (what needs work, what doesn't work at all, any management issues, how can we polish the set, what material needs to be changed, any gear need repair, etc) and we run the show start to finish 3 -4X a day, every day.

Once we have a run of gigs lined up, we try to arrange a day before hand just to put a final shine on the sets and make sure we're tight.

We get enough of one another doing the job. Don't need the social thing & the drama that comes with it.

[hernameisrio]

I work an almost-full time job and am in 3 projects, all of which are spread out across the subway map. I probably spend more time traveling to rehearsals and gigs than actually playing at said rehearsals and gigs. I am not handling it as well as I thought and I'm probably gonna do some housecleaning soon. Beyond the time, the money spent/energy racks up too.

Honestly at this point, I want to either work towards landing a steady, well-paying gig, get into sub/session work, or just dial it back to woodshedding in my room until winter blows over and I feel more emotionally grounded.