What am I??? Christmas fruitcake??

[Noseferatu]

So, I'm in my first band. For the last year or so, a guitarist friend and myself were discussing starting a band ala a mixture of Led Zeppelin and KISS. Ok. I can hang with that. Most of our influences are classic and I'm much more used to and much more interested in the classic stuff on both bass and guitar because I just find it more fulfilling. Anyway, fast forward to a month ago, he starts talking about starting a band with another one of our buddies who is completely metalcore Avenged Sevenfold, screamo, etc. I'm thinkin OK, I don't want to do this, but I'll just grin and bear it. Well then, my friend goes and buys a Schecter Solo 6 Hellraiser with EMG pickups. I should've know right then and there that it was starting to look bad. So we're talking on the phone about a week ago and we both decided that the metalcore thing is really not what we're into, because our influences are more classic and actually more creative.

He had been talking for a couple weeks that he wanted me to teach his girlfriend to play bass. I'm like, oh, ok.

So, we get to talking and he says "I'm buying a BOSS Metalcore pedal" and I'm thinking "ohhhhhh no, this is not looking good", so he lied and is now suddenly into metalcore again. What the bleep??



Then he says that he wants me to teach his girlfriend bass so she can play bass in the band and I can play rhythm guitar and I go . Absolutely not. I am completely capable of playing rhythm but I'm much more of a bass player, and a pretty good one at that, and that's what I'm comfortable with.


Is this one of those situations where ego has to come into play???

[Drop-the-One]

he lied 'cause he felt embarassed for liking it infront of you. but he still likes it, no doubt.

Not sure what "ego" has to do with... but if you don't like "core"... why are you even bothering?

[Neek]

You can always just tell your friend that you arent interested in that type of music. If that means that you pull out of the band, oh well. If that means that the band changes its musical style to one you like better, then all is well, id say.

This kind of reminds me of that time my drummer wanted me to start a post-hardcore neo-classical country-metal group with him... boy did i dodge a bullet declining that offer

[Noseferatu]

You guys are misunderstanding me. It's not that I don't like metal/metalcore. I do. I just really don't want to play it. I don't mind playing Alice In Chains type metal. They're more metal to me than grunge honestly.


My main beef is how he's praised me as a bass player and said "oh you'd be great" blah blah, etc, etc and then turns around and wants me to teach hos GIRLFRIEND bass so she can play bass in the band and I can play rhythm.

[Dark Horse]

Move along and wish him luck.

Stay friends, but the indecisiveness just leads to headaches and strained friendships.

[bassmonkeee]

Originally Posted by Noseferatu

My main beef is how he's praised me as a bass player and said "oh you'd be great" blah blah, etc, etc and then turns around and wants me to teach hos GIRLFRIEND bass so she can play bass in the band and I can play rhythm.

That's simple enough. "Sure, honey, you can be in the band" = getting laid. I wouldn't take it personally. It's called thinking with your d!ck.

[basskababble]

He doesn't take it seriously. You seem to. As bassmonkeee put it, he's the only one going to get laid out of this... if that's what he's looking for. If you're looking for the same thing it's not going to happen, and if you're looking for the satisfaction of writing music you're proud of, it's not going to happen either.

IME don't waste time on bands with obligatory members. Let your friend teach his lady bass, and you go find someone who wants to pursue this the way you do. Doesn't mean you can't be friends, or talk shop, or even jam.

[jvollrath]

I'd give his girlfriend a lesson or two.

Bazinga.

[MatticusMania]

Originally Posted by jvollrath

I'd give his girlfriend a lesson or two.

Bazinga.

+1, as I suggest the OP do.

[tdub0199]

the title of this pot kinda offends me.... I'm not into playing country, blues, jazz etc... but I'm not gonna go around and bash those genre's either.... good music is just that... Good Music!!!! Just a word of advice, don't be so harsh and you may getter better responses.....

[essentre]

I say go find a band that you like. One thing I've learned over the years is you need to do what you like, if you don't, it's always a struggle or unpleasant.

[bassmonkeee]

Originally Posted by tdub0199

the title of this pot kinda offends me.... I'm not into playing country, blues, jazz etc... but I'm not gonna go around and bash those genre's either.... good music is just that... Good Music!!!! Just a word of advice, don't be so harsh and you may getter better responses.....

Are you still offended if you read it in Homer Simpson's voice?

[Absentia]

I agree with the title, after playing in metal bands for..well, i've never played anything else, but most metal head guitards I've run into are indeed douche bags.

Anyhoo, just leave, or play rhythm, teach his girlfriend how to play bass with her sitting on your lap, they'll breakup and you'll be the bassist again. I had the same situation in high school.

[tekhedd]

Look at it this way: if you were a frustrated guitarist, this would be the best news you've heard in years!

Joking aside, it sounds like a nightmare. Relationships within a band are like... I don't know, kind of like having land mines on stage. One false step, boom! And, they can take out several band members at once.

Luck.

[basskababble]

Originally Posted by tekhedd

Look at it this way: if you were a frustrated guitarist, this would be the best news you've heard in years!

Joking aside, it sounds like a nightmare. Relationships within a band are like... I don't know, kind of like having land mines on stage. One false step, boom! And, they can take out several band members at once.

Luck.

Yeah dude... girlfriends are bad for bands when the girls AREN'T in the band. Nothing good can come of that.

They fight, the band doesn't write... they break up... so does the band. You don't want to be an extension of their relationship.

If he's doing it to include her... tell him to grow some and tell her that this is what he does, that he learned on his own, and that she'll be much happier learning on her own an finding her own band if she's interested in doing that...

Or if she's hot just put her in a bikini and let her be the hype girl if you guys ever settle on your numetal 70's party band.

[xxfaux_punkxx]

MOD EDIT: The post in question was deleted...


anyway on topic... don't waste your time. If the guitarist wants you to teach his GF bass then charge her/him. Why should you do your replacements any favors?

[EdHunter]

I had kinda this issue a few months ago. Having started off promisingly, the band I have with my friends took a turn the wrong way. Drop B tuning, polyrhythms, blast beats and a complete embargo on lyrics that "make too much sense". I threatened to leave, and now it's a million times better.

And on the whole girlfriends situation;
the last 4 days we've been writing a song, and yesterday we recorded the drums and almost all the bass. Today we'd decided to finish it off, add some vocals, mix it and wrap it all up. But no. The guitarist's girlfirend just got back from a week away, so he had to spend the day with her... This is the same guy who left a rehersal early, completly unnanounced, to meet up with a girl I was trying to egt with at the time. We may start playing Stonehenge and Gimem Some Money soon...

[poorbassist15]

Originally Posted by EdHunter

I had kinda this issue a few months ago. Having started off promisingly, the band I have with my friends took a turn the wrong way. Drop B tuning, polyrhythms, blast beats and a complete embargo on lyrics that "make too much sense". I threatened to leave, and now it's a million times better.

And on the whole girlfriends situation;
the last 4 days we've been writing a song, and yesterday we recorded the drums and almost all the bass. Today we'd decided to finish it off, add some vocals, mix it and wrap it all up. But no. The guitarist's girlfirend just got back from a week away, so he had to spend the day with her... This is the same guy who left a rehersal early, completly unnanounced, to meet up with a girl I was trying to egt with at the time. We may start playing Stonehenge and Gimem Some Money soon...

That would be heaven for me. I love playing polyrhythms, and as for lyrics that don't make sense, anyone here listen to Yes?

[Pillgrimm13]

Originally Posted by somegeezer

Post deleted by mod ...

+1, im a metal head into most music styles accept corperate modern country, modern pop, screamo and deathcore. to me its all music lite. (im a death/black metal lover in particular) to me deathcore and screamo sounds like ripped off death metal without the talent, guitar solos, melody and substance but thats my problem and that dosent mean that i hate it. i suport all metal in the end and all music for that matter. to each there own and as long as people are playing instruments im happy.
music has many angles and each style creates art wether we as individuals like it or not. somebody does and is creating beauty and thats what makes the world beautiful. a diamond wouldnt be as pretty with only one facet.

[CultofJay]

The only thing in this situation that would slightly offend me if I were in your shoes is that your friend thinks his gf, someone who's never played bass, would be able to pick it up after a few lessons. Never mind that metal can get very intricate and be totally overwhelming for a beginner, it's the whole "bass is just an easier version of a guitar" attitude that irks me. Plus, being in a band w/ the gf? No way. Maybe that's not what's going on here, but that's how I saw it.