Why is it so tough putting a band together?

Dave44 · #1 03-15-2011, 08:11 AM

Formed a band 6 months ago now it's gone. Takes two to tango. Had a great little blues band going found an absolutely fab drummer and then the guitarist has a spat with him and leaves. Sigh................ Why is so hard for musician to get along? Has someone got an answer to this age old problem? I've been at it for over thirty years now and this same bull@#it hits the fan everytime. I'll never give it up and hope to be playin' till the day I die. Just once I'd like a band I'm in last longer than a few years at best. Sorry for the rant but just a little bummed at the moment it'll pass, always does. Saving grace is the drummer is a great person and player and loves the rhythm we put together so we'll find something together and continue to lay in a groove. Peace to all.

olalo · #2 03-15-2011, 08:19 AM

''music is the art of combining schedules''
...or people in this case.

AciDBatH666 · #3 03-15-2011, 08:20 AM

I'm in the same boat. I'm having nothing but difficulties just trying to piece something together at the moment. Got a shredder of a guitarist and me. I've had 2 drummer's flake out on me. I told them what we wanted to do, they seemed down for it. Ask if they'd like to cover anything in particular, what kind of sound they'd like, offer to pay for 2 months of a storage unit fee so if things don't work out they're not left with any burden. Even being open minded and asking for their input, I still get people flaking out on me.
Starting to piss me off.

dalkowski · #4 03-15-2011, 08:25 AM

A band that gels is a convergence of hard work and dumb luck in equal measure.

mpdd · #5 03-15-2011, 08:26 AM

it' either the material, the level of playing, psychosis, substance abuse, or schedules, but it is very hard to get things going. i've just dedicated myself to consistently improving to the point that i'll be really ready when and if a more serious/stable situation arises

sparktone · #6 03-15-2011, 08:31 AM

In my very limited experience, it seems a lot of problems come from the difference in expectations members have for the band. That and the fact that it's like a 3-, 4- or 5-way marriage. Not everyone has the communication and conflict-resolution skills that get you through a rough patch.

GeddyNCliffRule · #7 03-15-2011, 08:31 AM

I hear ya. As Jeff Hanneman once said, "It's how you put up with each other for so long and push through the ******** that makes a great band", or something like that. Wish you luck and don't ever give up on yourself!

chump stain · #8 03-15-2011, 09:18 AM

For a while I was fed up with trying to put together a band. Instead I would just join exsisting bands. That worked pretty good, but usually joining a band where someone just quit can be like walking into a hornet's nest as well.

Now I'm in an original band, where the bassist quit, and I'm in a cover band that I put together. Both are working out, but it took almost a whole year to get the cover band going, especially since our singer quit, and it set us back. But we found a new singer and have a nice paid gig coming up. It's hard, everyone has to be commited to making it work.

Don't give up.

stevemac · #9 03-15-2011, 09:25 AM

I'd think you have to try and enjoy the ride and not be gig-or-die about it.

treekiller · #10 03-15-2011, 09:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dalkowski

A band that gels is a convergence of hard work and dumb luck in equal measure.

This!!!

I have been in a similar situation, fortunately we were able to re-form with a new drummer 6 months later. If you keep an open mind and build up your contacts, you may be able to find the right like-minded people to start again.

Tampabass · #11 03-15-2011, 09:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sparktone

In my very limited experience, it seems a lot of problems come from the difference in expectations members have for the band. That and the fact that it's like a 3-, 4- or 5-way marriage. Not everyone has the communication and conflict-resolution skills that get you through a rough patch.

+1 - different expectations, yes, and the more members the harder it is. Different musical abilities/interests also can doom a band. And so can differences over how/when to spend $$ to get the band going and how the promotional work, booking work, and technical work (PAs, lighting, etc) will be divided can create havoc. It's impossible to ward off all these issues in advance. Only way I know how to do it is to find musically likeminded guys who get along well, and then just go for it.

bass_snake · #12 03-15-2011, 09:27 AM

[quote=chump stain;10592532]usually joining a band where someone just quit can be like walking into a hornet's nest as well.QUOTE]

I hear ya. I' d rather join a band that is just forming..

Fred

bassbully · #13 03-15-2011, 09:30 AM

This might sound wrong but I find with different types of music and the people that play them can make a diff. Don't get me wrong this is not always the case but IMO harder rock and Metal in my experience's early on had players that were all over the place and had the most issues. They were also the youngest players I met and played with.There were always bands issues and bands breaking up... a revolving door scene.

It wasnt until i went to blues,country and folk type music where I found more grounded, older, solid players that had their #hit together and had a direction, job ,equipment, car etc. Again this is only my experience. I have seen issues with others in bands who also dont screen for auditions and try to fit the wrong person into a role that they dont belong just to get a player in a band...it wont work. Continue looking, screen for auditions and hope for the best.

MNAirHead · #14 03-15-2011, 09:32 AM

It really isn't..

The issue is that most folks don't want to invest...

Meaning... it's super simple.

Get a solid name... build a website.. put cash aside for photography.. get your brochures in order... have your demo 99% done... have the set lists orchestrated.. with lyric sheets, youtube links and mp3s.... write down your plan

THEN
go out and find someone that you can insert and get fast paying gigs.

The reality is someone has to invest... most guys over sell the current situation and do not discuss the how we get gigs thing.

-----

The "were a band" rarely works as before you know it I want to play Zac Brown while the drummer wants to play Sublime.

The more specific and prepared you can be, the easier it is.

Unfortunately most guys want to get paid to play -- few will pick up a phone to do some but wil blame it on the leader when ther are no bookings.

MNAirHead · #15 03-15-2011, 09:35 AM

The minute we all drop the "romance" and "convergence of artistic talent" is the minute it all becomes much easier.

for most bands, we're selling something (drinks, merchandise, happy guests etc).

OUt of most of the bands I've run into----I'd say 90% are romatantic buskers seeking a purpose.. they really aren't a band.

Tampabass · #16 03-15-2011, 09:44 AM

Yes, if it's just a gigging band, like a jazz trio I lead, then it can be pretty simple and very straighforward. I take care of almost all of the booking and promotional details, and we just go and play the gig. We all know the same jazz standards, and the ones we don't, we can just get the chord charts and read. Musically, it tends to be about half and half between me and the chordal player, the drum seat has rotated quite a bit (original drummer passed away).

But if you're trying to get together a wider variety of music that maybe you're not all familiar with and/or doing unusual arrangements & building originals into the set, then I wouldn't agree that it's super simple at all.

And it's particularly not simple if you're trying to squeeze in rehearsals, booking, promotion, logistics and everything else in addition to a full-time job and family commitments.

Worth it? Yes. Easier with more mature/experienced guys? Yes. But not necessarily easy.

fullrangebass · #17 03-15-2011, 09:46 AM

Someone needs to be the leader, show the direction and set the rules for the band (from playlist and rehearsing to getting ang playing gigs). In my band, I'm that person. Egos better stay out of the "band" setting or it's a disaster

**TinIndian** · #18 03-15-2011, 10:24 AM

I just joined a band for the first time in over 20 years. Never thought I'd do it again. The band I joined has been together for a number of years with many personnel changes along the way. Everyone is responsible, everyone works their stuff out off line and brings what they've learned to practice with them and we knock it out, see if it works. All the members are in their 40's and with the exception of the drummer had completely dropped out of music all together for extended periods of time. We all have good professional jobs outside of music so the music is a release for all of us. It's about having fun but keeping it professional at the same time.

It seems maturity and singlemindedness play key roles as well.