Wow, first post and you're ponying up! Welcome to TB/DB!
YOU'D BE SO NICE: Wow, she fluffs the intonation even before the band comes in! Arooo!
Your time sounds good in the metronomic sense. Playing two-beat, you don't have to stick to half-notes, though. A little bit of something more shows that you have more than one clock going. Try some left-hand pull-offs or the occasional dotted quarter and eighth or suchlike. It allows you more musical options and different ways to appropriately kick the tune.
Solo: Intonation (which is my big trouble in life, too). Also, when you start the solo with walking like that it makes it sound like you'd forgotten that it was your turn to solo. Enter strong!
I like your use of space. Very nice. You're framing your ideas and it works.
Two constructively critical comments:
a) Use some more rhythmic variety. Try some triplets and sixteenth-notes.
b) I'm not hearing you DEVELOP an idea. One EXERCISE I advocate is letting the last three tones of a phrase be the first three tones of the next phrase. Not the same rhythm, just the notes. Note that this is an exercise only. The use of this device in concert settings will cause your end-pin to fall off.
Finally, I strongly encourage you to get Bob Brookmeyer's version of this tune off
Live At Sandy's from EMusic
right here. The things that Michael Moore does with this song are an education, man -- I've been studying them for almost thirty years and I'm still learning.
Play on, G!
