The Fender Bass V: a play in one act.
Our story begins as the Fender Bass V meets with his manager, fresh from a meeting with with Fender R&D team.
Bass V: So what did they say?
Manager: Not this time I’m afraid.
Bass V: Why the heck not? Look at all the other stuff they’ve reissued. Mustang basses, Musicmasters, Telecaster basses with a big humbucker or covered in psychedelic wallpaper. Heck, they even came out with new basses in that awful Antigua finish.
Manager: Well, you weren’t that successful the first time around, and people’s concept of a five string bass has changed.
Bass V: Successful? They put out a new Bass VI and nobody bought those either! Couldn't they test the waters with a Squier version?
Manager: Well, maybe. After all, they've just announced a Squier version of the Bass VI
Bass V: There’s a Squier version of the Bass VI? You’re putting me on!
Manager: No, they announced it the same time as the new Coranodos
Bass V: Coronados? They're reissuing the Coronados? WHAT THE HECK?
Manager: Now, calm down. Hollowbodies have seen a rise in popularity, and…
Bass V: Popularity? POPULARITY? Don’t talk to me about popularity! Everywhere you look people are playing five-string basses…and who was the first? Tell me? Who was the first?
Manager: You were, but…
Bass V: It was me, baby! That’s right! Maybe I didn’t have the extended range. Maybe I only had fifteen frets, and yes, maybe I was too big for my own good, but you know what I had? I had a big letter F stamped on my bridge cover, just like the Jazz Bass. I had a split pickup, just like the Precision! For crying out loud, I even had my own full page “You won’t part with yours either” ad. Doesn't that count for something?
Manager: I see your point, but those other basses were played by some famous people.
Bass V: You want famous? Ever heard of Led Zeppelin? John Paul Jones played a Bass V. That’s right! It’s on a damn album cover or something. And how about James Jamerson? He used me in the recording studio…the original Motown studio that’s now a museum! I WAS STABLEMATES WITH THE FUNK MACHINE!
Manager: Look, I know it’s not fun to be picked last, but you’ve got to be patient. Maybe your time is just around the corner. They’ve got to give these new models a chance and determine if the market will accept these basses that weren't big hits the first time around. Let’s wait and see how the Coronado and Starcaster basses fare and then we can approach them again.
Bass V: Starcaster bass? The Starcaster was a guitar from the seventies. A weird looking hollow thing that no one bought.
Manager: Yes, but there were a few prototypes of a bass version made. It never went into production, but they're releasing it now along with the Coronado bass.
Bass V: (Long pause) Get out. I want to be alone.
Last edited by Steve Boisen : 09-13-2013 at 12:51 AM.