A Bad Joke

Discussion in 'Bass Humor & Gig Stories [BG]' started by brlottermann, Jan 15, 2013.


  1. brlottermann

    brlottermann

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    So, at a gig recently things were pretty mellow and the audience was not very responsive, so I tried spicing things up with some humor. "So, I've been walkin the bass for several years now and my only question is.. When will I get there?!"

    Needless to say, nobody laughed.
     
  2. HolmeBass

    HolmeBass Supporting Member

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    Maybe: "So, I've been walkin the bass for several years now and my only question is... when will it finally relieve itself?"

    Then again, maybe that's even worse...
     
  3. thedudebrah

    thedudebrah Supporting Member

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    My go-to bad joke is:

    What's a pirate's favorite drink?



    Rum.

    And then I turn away from the mic and listen for the groans :D
     
  4. tomydacat

    tomydacat Supporting Member

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    next time you could say what is Pirates favorite letter???


    RRRRRRRRR
     
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  6. ItchyPBass

    ItchyPBass

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    My personal favourite 'awkward joke':

    What are the similarities between cows and grass?

    They both moo, except the grass.

    Makes me happy :D
     
  7. bassinplace

    bassinplace

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    Which rum?

    Bac-aarrrgh-di, of course!
     
  8. klejst

    klejst

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    Since we are on pirate jokes I have a few


    What is a pirates favorite element on the Periodic Table?

    Argon


    What was the pirates favorite movie from 2012?

    Argo


    :D
     
  9. bongomania

    bongomania Gold Supporting Member

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    What was that movie rated?


    Aarrrr...
     
  10. klejst

    klejst

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    Ha ha nice, and yes, yes it was
     
  11. capncal

    capncal

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    i like to tell the sound guy to adjust my autotune.
     
  12. TolerancEJ

    TolerancEJ

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    They probably didn't get it. Most audience members may not be familiar with the music phrases such as "walking bass line."
     
  13. bassinplace

    bassinplace

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    Now that's a good one!
     
  14. Kmonk

    Kmonk

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    Since I live in the Boston area where apparently people think Tom Brady is God, the joke I use is:

    Peyton and Eli Manning walk into a bar..........................................To watch the playoffs
     
  15. Zooberwerx

    Zooberwerx Gold Supporting Member

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    Football jokes, eh?...

    Why does Lambeau Field have astro-turf?

    To keep the cheerleaders from grazing during the game.

    Riis
     
  16. Bob C

    Bob C

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    I don't get it.
     
  17. SolarMan

    SolarMan Supporting Member

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    They both mow, except the cows

    :)
     
  18. mattbass6945

    mattbass6945

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    did you hear the one about the pirate with a steering wheel in his pants?
    he said, "arrr, it's drivin' me nuts!"
    i'm hear all week, try the veal.......
     
  19. SolarMan

    SolarMan Supporting Member

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    My favorite is also the shortest joke in the world:

    "A baby seal walks into a club..."
     
  20. mattbass6945

    mattbass6945

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  21. Ender_rpm

    Ender_rpm

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    Our next song... Have any of you been really screwed over in relationships?

    *cheers, hoots etc*

    Great, because this song is not about that.

    1234!!!
     

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