DISCLAIMER:Just in case you don't pickup on sarcasm well or you don't read threads in their entirety: this is meant to be fun. As you can tell from my feedback on TB, I have had a lot of GAS since joining. That GAS has lead me to buy and sell a lot of instruments over the past few years. I consider myself an expert in the art of buying and selling. I see a lot of basses in the tb classifieds that aren't moving so I thought I'd give some advice to you newbs... Fretwear: Do not disclose any. As soon as you do, no one is interested. Weight: If your bass is heavy talk about how well it balances (to you) and that you have played 8 hour gigs with it with no issues. *BONUS* leave the weight out of your listing so people will bump your thread asking for it and you bump it with your reply. Action: Always say your bass has a low action or atleast say it's capable of a low action. Shims: Do NOT mention shimming the neck...people don't like that. MOJO: If you got it flaunt it. Upsell the wear and tear on your bass! Mint: People like this, put near in front of it for additional coverage if there is a slight bit of wear. Sound: Use words like punchy, deep, woody, cut thru the mix, etc. Steroids: Are always good. J bass lovers really like them. Price: If you've bumped your bass for more than a couple of days you should drop the price. If it has been in the classifieds for a week...it's time for a FIRE SALE! Just having some fun. And yea, I am guilty of some of these. Feel free to add any funny sales tactics or things you see/don't see!