Quick backstory: In high school (roughly 1997), myself and 4 friends started a band. The singer and I had been best friends since 5 years old, and dreamed of being the next John & Paul, Mick & Keith, Bono & Edge, etc. By the time we reached college age, we finally ended up with a decent lineup and got a lot better, had gigs, wrote a bunch of songs, etc. Then, this singer became really depressed in about 2008. We were about 26 by this time, and it was becoming obvious that while we were a good band and enjoyed it, we weren't going to "make it". He was in a really bad relationship, had financial problems, became an alcoholic, and gained roughly 100 pounds. He hedged all his bets on our band "making it", and he lost. The rest of us were much more sensible, went to college, built careers, etc. He started contributing less to the band, wouldn't show up for gigs, or practice, or even various other social events. We eventually got to the point where the band functioned much better without him. There was a big blowup at our last gig (Thanksgiving Eve, 2009) between him and the drummer, and the band pretty much stopped existed after that night. 4 years have gone by since then, and the rest of us just want to play for fun. Nobody wants the old singer back, including me. He is still living in the past. He is now 32, and still lives on a college campus, parties more than most college seniors 10 years younger than him, has no future, no woman, no prospects of any kind really. He is a truly depressed individual, and blames all his friends for getting married and moving on with their lives. He left me a message the other day saying how we need to get the band back together, because it's the only thing he's ever loved, and thinks it will fill the huge void in his life. The problem is, the rest of us just want to do it for fun. We want to continue writing originals, but also be a cover band and actually get some decent gigs. We have 2 gigs lined up for next summer already, and are gonna start looking for more. Also, we have already found another singer. He's like us: has a career and a family, and just wants to do this as a hobby. I feel like I'm too old to keep it a secret. I'm gonna post pics, vids and annoucements about the band on facebook. But the former singer is not going to be happy. In fact, I fear that this might be the straw that breaks the camel's back. I'm seriously worried he may try to kill himself. He just lost another girlfriend, this time she left him for one of his closest friends. His parents recently got divorced, have sold his childhood home, and both have new homes with new partners; he has no home anymore. He works in a deadend job, he's an alcoholic, he's just extremely lonely. I realize that he's made his own mess. I know I'm not responsible for the poor decisions he's made in his life. And yet, this is my oldest friend, and although I barely have anything in common with him on the surface, there is an intangible element where we know each other better than ourselves, can finish each other's sentences, could carry on an entire conversation without saying a word, etc. I'm really stuck on this. Meanwhile, the other guys don't really see what the issue is, or they just don't care about him like I do.