Most of you know I was a cop for 27 years. Since Ive now retired, I feel ready to bare my soul. I will confess my sins, here and now. Cop haters, jump on man. I deserve it. 1. I have used my lights and siren when I had to poop really bad. 2. If a girl exposed cleavage trying to get out of a ticket, I looked at her funbags, and then proceded with either the ticket or warning. 3. I got free coffee from convenience stores who were open all night, but always left a tip that was at least the amount the coffee would coast. 4. I laughed at citizens, sometimes right to their face, when they were being dumbasses. 5. When a citizen told me he/she paid my salary, I usually ignored it, but sometimes responded with, (a) "They dont take City tax out of welfare checks", b) " then give me a raise you cheap bastard". 6. When a drunk and stupid citizen said "I'll have your badge!", I responded " If you can have it, I don't want it" I will think of more in a little bit.