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Oh. CRAP. Now with poll!!

Discussion in 'Off Topic [BG]' started by Relic, Dec 22, 2012.


How do I get out of murdering the wife's orchids

Poll closed Jan 1, 2013.
  1. Say nothing. Know nothing. See nothing.

    25 vote(s)
    30.5%
  2. Tell the truth, get down on knees and beg forgiveness

    31 vote(s)
    37.8%
  3. Blame it all on the dogs and/or cat.

    2 vote(s)
    2.4%
  4. Lie my arse off in about a week. IE: "OMG it looks like your orchids have some sort of disease!"

    9 vote(s)
    11.0%
  5. Transplant all with carrots.

    15 vote(s)
    18.3%
  1. Relic

    Relic Cow are you?

    Sep 12, 2006
    Robbinsville, NJ
    So, the wife and kids are out for the afternoon and me being way cool, decided to clean up the house.
    Scrubbing, dusting, cleaning windows....So I decide to take a break and I set the Windex down... I happen to look over at her prized orchids..hmm...a little dry... so I reach over grab the spray bottle of water and start spritzing away... her secret to growing them is a regular misting done with a liberal helping of OCD-ness...so I happen to look down........WINDEX!!!!!!!!!! HOLY SHIRT!!!!!!!!!! I wiped them off as best as I could and doused them with water but I got a lot in the roots too, so what do I do!??? HELP TBOT!!!!!!!!!

    I'm including a poll to help me get out of this!:help::help::help::help::help:
     
  2. Well hopefully you went above and beyond with the rest of the house...
     
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  4. Ziltoid

    Ziltoid

    Apr 10, 2009
    Canada
    Carrots > Orchids
     
  5. hdracer

    hdracer Supporting Member

    Feb 15, 2009
    Elk River, MN.
    That's what you get for cleaning.
    You should be on the couch with a beer watching tv.
     
  6. Relic

    Relic Cow are you?

    Sep 12, 2006
    Robbinsville, NJ
    Oh I am now believe me. Me and my Newcastle Brown.
     
  7. Start by buying another Bass. Then throw the plants away, but you have to leave the pot they were in spotless. Maybe put it in the dishwasher. Then act clueless.

    Step 2, play new Bass in the doghouse
     
  8. arbitrary

    arbitrary

    Oct 24, 2005
    Boston, MA
    sounds like success to me. She won't ask you to clean for at least 3 months.
     
  9. Step 3, but a dog and dump plants on ground.
     
  10. jbrooks

    jbrooks

    Sep 7, 2007
  11. Get comfortable on that couch. You're going to be spending a lot of time there.
     
  12. :D
     
  13. Richland123

    Richland123

    Apr 17, 2009
    To quote the guys from Monty Python - RUN AWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
     
  14. mongo2

    mongo2

    Feb 17, 2008
    To quote Sgt. Schultz, "I know nothiiinnnggg."
     
  15. I find your misfortune incredibly amusing :D Good luck!
     
  16. Philonius

    Philonius Supporting Member

    Mar 22, 2009
    2k W of the Duwamsh
    Well, I really like #6, but in case you want to try for "Plan B" (I know, Plan B hasn't been exactly successful lately), rinse the heck out of them in the shower, lukewarm water. Just leave them there to drain afterwards. Orchids generally don't like to sit in water, but they're potted in fast-draining medium.

    Then get ready to apologize.
     
  17. pocketgroove

    pocketgroove

    Jun 28, 2010
    Detroit
    May as well try. Just flush the heck out of the soil. Maybe they won't die. If they do, play dumb.
     
  18. Tituscrow

    Tituscrow Banned

    Feb 14, 2011
    NW England
  19. smperry

    smperry Moderator Staff Member Gold Supporting Member

    Nov 3, 2003
    Long Island, NY
    Disclosures:
    Endorsing Artist: Martin Keith Guitars
    Yikes!

    Beg forgiveness...you might be running to a garden shop for a soil transplant or something. Agreed about watering/draining the heck out of the soil in the meantime.

    It's been nice knowing you. :meh:
     
  20. HaMMerHeD

    HaMMerHeD

    May 20, 2005
    Norman, OK
    Truth is overrated, and wives aren't capable of appreciating it anyway.

    Do nothing.

    Otherwise, nuke the site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.
     
  21. AmpedSilence

    AmpedSilence Supporting Member

    Feb 2, 2012
    L'ville, GA
    ^ Wise words.

    Either way, there is no escape from the wrath... 12/21/12 may still be happening!



    for you ;)
     



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