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Wife or girlfriend coming to every gig.

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous [BG]' started by thenazz, Dec 20, 2013.


  1. thenazz

    thenazz

    Joined:
    May 9, 2011
    Location:
    Pensacola, FL
    I don't like it. I'm a full type musician, it's my job. Sometimes I just want to hang with the guys between sets, or go talk to the patrons in the club, which I think is good for business. Thoughts?
     
  2. electracoyote

    electracoyote

    Joined:
    Jan 2, 2009
    Location:
    Purple Mountain Majesties
    I gig about every weekend. My wife comes to every gig. I have no idea why. I don't think she's jealous or possessive. I think she really likes the music, the show, and hanging with the other band posse. Sometimes I have time to hang out with her between sets. Sometimes I do not. She knows and accepts this going in, and she is never resentful. She is an angel. If your wife or sig. other is like this, there is no reason not to have them there at the gig. If you get friction, you have a problem on your hands, no doubt.
     
  3. Groovy_Gravy

    Groovy_Gravy

    Joined:
    Apr 26, 2012
    Tell your wife to go talk with her friends on set break??
     
  4. wmheilma

    wmheilma

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2010
    Roll with it! My wife never comes to shows anymore which is too bad. If you gig enough long enough she'll probably stop coming.
     
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  6. Wolffgang

    Wolffgang

    Joined:
    Jan 1, 2012
    Location:
    Newcastle, Australia
    If you can't say that to her in an open, honest conversation and have her be cool with it, you've got bigger problems that talkbass can't help with >.>
     
  7. Mike Dimin

    Mike Dimin Supporting Member

    Joined:
    Dec 11, 1999
    Disclosures:
    Clinician: EA, Zon, Boomerang, TI. Author "The Art of Solo Bass"
    I agree. I don't think my wife would appreciate me going to her job everyday, applauding as she finishes up with every patient.

    This is work, I'm a pro. I need to be able to focus without the distractions family brings to the job
     
  8. Bassconbeatz

    Bassconbeatz Way down low

    Joined:
    Feb 5, 2004
    Location:
    Porter Ranch, CA
    I have no choice. My wife is our keyboard player :)
     
  9. ZachariahLee

    ZachariahLee

    Joined:
    Feb 3, 2013
    Location:
    Texas
    Would you be asking the same thing if it was your best friend that showed up to every gig? Sure it's nice to have some bro time, but count your blessings that she cares enough to show up. I wouldn't even watch a Metallica show once a week for more than a month before loosing the excitement. (Metallica is one of my favorite bands for the record)
     
  10. E-At

    E-At

    Joined:
    Mar 1, 2010
    Location:
    Argentina
    Are you in a band called Wings? :p
     
  11. Bassconbeatz

    Bassconbeatz Way down low

    Joined:
    Feb 5, 2004
    Location:
    Porter Ranch, CA
    Too funny. I'm not a lefty though but my son is and he plays the drums. :bassist:


     
  12. hotrodjohn

    hotrodjohn Supporting Member

    Joined:
    Aug 7, 2009
    My wife hates the music I play and is usually in bed by 9, so needless to say she is not a regular at my gigs...
     
  13. bassmeknik

    bassmeknik

    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2009
    Location:
    Fair Haven, MI
    My gf is at most gigs and completely understands that she won't get to sit by me every break, but then again she is also a bass player so she gets it...
     
  14. Marley's Ghost

    Marley's Ghost Supporting Member

    Joined:
    Feb 9, 2002
    Location:
    Delawhere
    If she's glaring at other women, demanding your attention at every break, and/or complaining about volume/song choices etc, then you have a problem. If a frank adult conversation doesn't modify her behavior, then the problem beyond just your music.
     
  15. mam1862

    mam1862 Supporting Member

    Joined:
    Nov 10, 2008
    Location:
    Northfield, Ohio
    My wife comes to about 90% of my gigs. She always has a great time and is busy talking with everyone. She doesn't bother me at all. My biggest problem is the bar tab is equal to what I make playing. She has a good time and we have quite a few friends that show up so it works out. If I could only get her to help set up and tear down that would make the night. It's all good fun.
     
  16. Ronbassman

    Ronbassman

    Joined:
    Jun 1, 2011
    Learn to live with it. If you don't like her presence in your social gatherings/events/whatever, why did you get married in the first place?
     
  17. superHEAVYfunk

    superHEAVYfunk

    Joined:
    Mar 11, 2013
    Location:
    Toronto


    My only contribution to this thread is to +1 both of these earlier posts.

    Your wife or gf is supposed to be your (or at least one of) best friend, no? Unless you plan to flirt/go home with some other broad, why should it matter that she comes to the gigs?
     
  18. hover

    hover

    Joined:
    Oct 4, 2008
    a-Yup.
     
  19. Jazz Ad

    Jazz Ad Mi la ré sol Gold Supporting Member

    Joined:
    Mar 16, 2002
    Location:
    Reims, Champagne, France
    I think it isn't a problem if she understands that she won't be your center of attention.
    Same gopes for kids.
     
  20. Thick McRunfast

    Thick McRunfast Not just good, good enough Supporting Member

    Joined:
    Sep 30, 2012
    Location:
    Portland, Oregon USA
    I'm not clear OP - is it your wife or your girlfriend that's showing up to your gigs?
    Both at the same time is bad
     
  21. MaGrass

    MaGrass

    Joined:
    Apr 14, 2013
    Location:
    London, UK
    I agree...

    Don't you play that wrong note when from the stage u kinda spot some jerk hitting on your chick.

    That's a sort of distraction that drives me mad because it affects my music...


    She could come whenever She wants as long as she really honestly wants to see the thing and as long as She understands that I do not need distractions when on stage...

    This said,

    Thank god I'm single. :beer:
     

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