”Do you love being bitchin’?”

Discussion in 'Bass Humor & Gig Stories [BG]' started by DoctorZee, Jun 14, 2019.

  1. DoctorZee

    DoctorZee Supporting Member

    Jan 27, 2018
    New York / New Jersey
    Found this posted on a local “musicians wanted” Facebook group. Posted here without comment. Enjoy!


    Do you want to have fun playing music for a living? Do you love banging hot chicks? Do you like smoking pot? Do you love being bitchin? Then come play guitar for Leather Rebel!!! We play glam/speed metal mixed with thrash and We are looking for a guitar player who shreds like an animal and has the ballsy attitude to go far!!! Must be energetic and be willing to do dumb poopie long hair VERY preferred but will consider you if you're very good. Cant be overweight since we all want to look good on stage and we are going to be moving around A LOT so we need someone who is athletic looking for guitar players in the style of eddie van halen, yngwie malmsteen, George lynch, satchel, and many other bitchin shredders please message me or text at xxx-xxx-xxxx for more information here is a clip of us rehearsing if you like what you hear inquire.
    BassCliff and Mr_Moo like this.
  2. JimK


    Dec 12, 1999
    Back in the day, we would read stuff like this in the Music Store, on their bulletin board...or at least, we hoped to.

    One I do recall: Similar to what you posted, except they wanted a vocalist. And this vocalist?
    "...must have own PA".
    Mr_Moo and Jimmy4string like this.
  3. Clark Dark

    Clark Dark

    Mar 3, 2005
    Dave Kindig ????
    Keger Jupit likes this.
  4. Nashrakh


    Aug 16, 2008
    Hamburg, Germany
    Well, if they can write my checks I will surely do something about my belly!
  5. bluesblaster


    Jan 2, 2008
    Bitchen !!!!
  6. flojob

    flojob Gold Supporting Member

    Oct 15, 2011
    Sounds like the steel panther thing. Those guys are great.
    etaym likes this.
  7. jthisdell


    Jun 12, 2014
    Roanoke, VA
    Sounds like I am in the wrong band
  8. oZZma


    Sep 13, 2018
    Sounds like they are in the wrong decade :smug:
  9. Oh yeah. I want all those things. I’m 64. Think my age will be an issue? They cant legally discriminate, right? :)
  10. gln1955

    gln1955 Supporting Member

    Aug 25, 2014
    Ohio, USA
    I've feeling bitchy right now. :mad:

  12. andawun


    Jul 13, 2009
    As I've gotten older I seem to be more bitchin!!! Now get off my lawn!!!
  13. Yonni


    Oct 31, 2016
    I’m a dumb poopie with an itch, do I qualify?
  14. Bunk McNulty

    Bunk McNulty It is not easy to do simple things correctly Suspended Supporting Member

    Dec 11, 2012
    Northampton, MA
    I have a dumb poopie long hair wig. Is that okay? Oh, wait! I cannot shred like George Lynch. So, never mind. You won't want him, either, as he appears to have given up on the dumb poopie long hair look.

  15. It's an ad for a guitar player. Most of the phrasing in that ad is seriously dog-whistling to a guitar player. :roflmao:
    S-Bigbottom likes this.
  16. Michedelic

    Michedelic MId-Century Modern

  17. Dean N

    Dean N

    Jul 4, 2006
    Pittsburgh, PA
    Huh huh.

    He said satchel.
    5StringBlues likes this.
  18. I do have long hair..... but it's not on my head unfortunately!
    mc900ftj and LowRick like this.