Ok, I'm in a cover band....well 2 kinda. My full time band plays out every weekend, I have a little "side" band with buddy's I grew up with that have played out about 3 times this yr. We {the side band} all grew up together, and the other musicians are all family guys or really don't care about playing out..... Anyway, here is the kicker.....my full time band didn't have a new yrs eve. gig booked......my side band got an offer at a local bar. I was a little hesitant to take it since we don't practice and have little gigging time in, but thought ***....so they book it.....well, my full time band was just offered a slot since the booked band hasn't verified the date. NOW...do I piss off my buds in the side band....or keep my commitment to my real full time band? My bud is getting a heads up that my full tie band is now booked and he's getting that "bitchy" thing going now....
If you are in more than one gigging band, as soon as you have a definite booking, you make the other band(s) aware that you are not available on that date. If I agree to a gig, I do it. If someone calls me for a gig, I ask for the date first, if I'm booked I tell them and don't even care if I know what gig I'm passing on, because it doesn't matter.
Happened to me for last night. My cover band wasn't booked, and as I understood it, not taking any more bookings in December as we had a big NYE gig to prep - horns, new tunes, etc. I have a littel jazz trio play with on occasion and they had lined up 3 Thursdays in a row so I booked with them as I was available. Three days after that, my other band is booked on one of the Thursdays. I said - and they were cool with it as we have played without one of us before, me included- I booked with these guys because we were not booking and free so I need to do this gig. Fortunately, the club double booked the jazz trio so we played there earlier in the evening and I went and did my cover gig later that night. I am tired today. It's tough when you are in more than one band. The best you can do is try to stay on top of it and I guess for me it's honor the first confirmed, booked gig.
Part of the reason you get "the big money" is because you have to juggle dates! I am a bandleader (in certain contexts), and my cover band works a lot of big-money weddings in the summer. I ask everyone in that band to commit to all Saturdays from Memorial Day through September. I need to be able to book those without having to call everyone. Most weddings are Saturdays, so it works well. Once in a while, we Friday or Sunday bookings, and for those, I send everyone a note to see if they are available. Of course, I try to sub them, if need be. We do have a policy that is designed for everyone to be able to freelance: if a given Saturday in the summer is not booked, and it's only 6 weeks away, we release the date and allow everyone to book other gigs for themselves. That's normally enough time to book clubs, and it would be unusual to book a wedding with such short notice. As a freelancer, you need to establish some sort of policy. Whatever that policy is, you have to stick to it. It's always easier to explain when you can point to a policy...
Any chance you could find a sub for one of the gigs? It's possible you could get out of this without pissing off anyone. Why don't you find out if anyone from TB is in your area?
Hell, I just turned down a NYE gig on principle alone. One of my bands got a call for an opening slot on New Years for $500, I told them on NYE I won't even leave the house for less than $250. Double the normal rate is standard and that is our normal rate, plus I already have plans with the Missus........
No NYE gig for me either. I will be a party where many of the guests are musicians who aren't working that night either so it should be an (alcohol fueled) fun night regardless.
I've been in a similar situation a time or two. Either with different bands/same night or same band/different venue. I always keep my first commitment when I book (or otherwise), regardless. The one time that I took the 'better' gig, I still regret. Contributing to more than one working project has its highs, and definitely its lows. Its a challenge to be sure. Since then, I've turned down double to cancel one over the other. I believe that personal integrity is not worth the extra cash. In the long run, a good reputation (and a clear conscience) more than makes up for it.
SO I spoke with my bud in the side band, they have a bass player to fill in, he's being a jerk about it though since they don't have alot of time to practice and work the new guy in....which is funny to me because if I was to play with him on new yrs, we would HAVE to get some practice in anyway....doesn't make since. I think it a little more personal since we grew up together and he can't stand the singer/leader of my full time band....some personality conflicts I guess
the "full time" band takes precedence over the "side" band. You know it and your buddies in the side band should know it. you did the right thing.