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4 friends in major Car Wreck [warning, not happy]

Discussion in 'Off Topic [BG]' started by CamMcIntyre, Apr 25, 2004.

  1. CamMcIntyre


    Jun 6, 2000
    As the title says-this past weekend 4 of my friends where involved in a major car accident. 1 of them [Heath] walked away from the accident with just a major mark on his body from his seat belt. The other 3 had to be cut out of the car. 1 of them [Danny] is hopefully being released from the hospital later this week as he just had a concussion [sp?]. These past two will be fine soon and will be dealing with the mental issues for long time.

    The driver [Josh], is currently in a drug induced coma. They wake him up every 12hours. They have him in the coma so that he doesn't hurt himself by moving. From what i've heard-he had his spleen removed, has somethin wrong with the vertebrates in his back, has a bruised heart, and bruised ribs. It's a miracle he wasn't paralyzed. When i saw him at the hospital they had him face down on his bed with all the medical stuff hooked up to him. I never thought i'd see this kid like that. He is a good guy-a fellow band nerd. It just hit me really hard when i saw him that the accident did happen. :meh: He had other internal injuries but i'm not sure exactly what. The doctors have said he's doing better, but he's not "out of the woods yet".

    The last one, won't ever be returning to the band room in the physical realm. :bawl: This guy was the worst of all the injuries. I didn't get a chance to see him. They did a bunch of tests on him and they wasn't any brain activity. So he was brain dead or really close to it. They made the decision to take him off of life support. From what i heard, is he fought for a bit, but then passed on at 9:45AM this morning. I know he is in a far better place.

    I can't really comprehend or fully grasp any of this.
    We are all juniors in high school and are all heavily involved in the band department. The guys had just gotten done playin on the streets downtown [it's encouraged here] and went for Taco Bell or something and the driver lost control of his car. Today-the band director and the principles opened up our LGI Room [large group instruction] and a student organized [in 1 our] gathering occured. There was about 40 of us all band people just gathering together to lend support and comfort to each other.

    This week has really sucked for me-broke up with my girlfriend, and then all this happened. The accident made me realize how little the arguments/fights with your significant others matter. I mean-the girl matters to me still, except we decided to work things out as best friends [we were before we started dating] and well-it just made me realize that the problems we're having with each other really don't matter at all compared to losing a friend and having several friends in the hospital. :meh:

    I just felt like i really needed to vent this out. If this doesn't follow the rules-delete it. That's all

    Here's the link to the article in our local paper.
  2. Davehenning


    Aug 9, 2001
    Los Angeles
    Having been through a few similar situations with my friends, my heart goes out to you, your friends and their families.

    Just be there for them, that is all you can do at this point.
  3. LimpChunk9


    May 8, 2001
    Bronx, NY
    I'm really sorry to hear all of this. You must be strong and stay positive.
  4. girlybassplaya

    girlybassplaya Guest

    Mar 24, 2004
    you know, that is really terrible. i appreciate the reminder that little arguements with your loved ones dont matter. you are right, and feel free to vent. you have friends here! i hope they all end up being ok. keep us updated, k?

    we should all say a little prayer for his friends :(
  5. kserg


    Feb 20, 2004
    London, UK
    eh... that does really suck... i am sorry to hear all this...
    had somewhat simular setuation with my cousin's family almost 2 years ago:/ very hard... i had simular problems thinking wise... just remebering last time i seen them... made it abit better because i was taken care of his little son in the hospital... was helping out and really didnt have time to think about what happen because i was busy all the time... and when i wasent i was smoking my 2 packs a day of cigs (i quit after that sortoff) ...but ya its very hard when someone close to you gets in something this bad...

    HOWEVER, i do have to say... i was amazed of quility of doctors in America... i always thought that they overpaid... they are not... for my cousin... they couldent do anything really... i dont blame them (blame police)... but they saved two of my nathue's lifes... it was amazing... I have no idea how hard they work... they really do... so imo they are probebly in good hands...

    I hope things get better...

    Good luck...

  6. By-Tor


    Apr 13, 2000
    Sacramento, CA
    Sorry to hear that CamMcIntyre and also for your loss kserg.

    Things will get better, just let it take its time.

    I too have lost friends in car accidents. It's tough but like I said things will get better.
  7. kserg


    Feb 20, 2004
    London, UK

    well point of my post was not to say what happen... but let CamMcIntyre know that imo doctors do amazing things here... they really do... i think his friends are most likely in good hands (again imo)... reason i said what happen because it is very sumular to what happen to him/his friends:/

    And yes they do get better... i mean you dont forget what happen... but with time u just remeber fun times you had with a person you loved... its funny we still talk about him as if he is there... and you kind of espect that he will walk in the door... kind of weird

    Sorry... i didnt mean it as what happen but i guess it kinda came out this way:/

    Much love
    and again... Hope things get better... I also found that having someone who listens to what happen and feels you to be helpful to get mind free... i am sure this place is right... people here are awsome...(except for me cuz... because i no ablo any language)

    edit: Also... ouch on the car... just saw the article... ouch...
  8. Against Will

    Against Will Supporting Member

    Dec 10, 2003
    Big Sound Central
    Life's funny.

    Good luck.
  9. I'm sorry to hear about the accident.

    Be strong for yourself and be strong for your friends.

    Take care.
  10. john turner

    john turner You don't want to do that. Trust me. Staff Member

    Mar 14, 2000
    atlanta ga
    my condolences, cam. that's a hard thing to deal with. hang in there.
  11. Life is precious, but sadly it can end in the blink of an eye. :(

    Sorry to hear about this, Cam. I hope your other friend makes a full recovery.

  12. raycer


    Mar 22, 2004
    Orange County, NY
    Sorry man :(

    Things like this are why I always believe that when you and someone you care for must part for little or long while, always make sure your parting words aren't argry ones, because you never know if you'll be able to make amends later.
  13. CamMcIntyre


    Jun 6, 2000
    I'm doing much better. Today at school, i had 3 classes-Physics, Jazz Band, and English. The administration had counselors from all the area schools [our corporation and the 2 other ones] all down in the band area if people needed to talk. The other thing they did was escuse us from any class at any time to go down there even if it is just to be with your peers. I went to my physics class, and then stayed down in the band room for the rest of the day. It felt good just to be around people who know exactly what you're feeling. We did several tribute type things today. We all had a piece of blue tape on our IDs/shirts. The blue tape is since we had areas marked off as "no loitering" and David was one of the guys that tore that stuff down. Also-today was his birthday so we all wore band shirts from things that he was involved in such as marching band, jazz band, or show [pep] band.

    The main thing i'm trying to do is to stay strong for my friends. I've never really been one of those people who just sits down and cries. I go over to my bass and express it all through that-i got the hint that people understood what i was saying when one of my friends said "can you play somethin happier?". :eek:

    Kinda sappy side note: i saw my ex [still good friends/trying to rebuild us] crying-felt really bad knowing that i couldn't do anything to help her e.g. talked to her a bit then when she had to leave i gave her options "i'm willing to hang out with you or i can stay away for a bit"-she chose for me to stay away. We still really care about each other-she's just really ticked at me [long story-won't bore you guys] and wants time apart [that's the hard part for me-i like to fix things and get them over with and all out there]. I do realize though-this is just high school and as much as these relationships seem to matter in the grand scheme of things it's like the tricycle that prepares you for the bike or something to that extent.

    Update on the conditions of the people: Josh [driver] had another surgery today to help fix some of the internal stuff again-he's doing better. Danny-is going to be released today or Tuesday. David-his funeral is on Wednesday, our school jazz band [he was apart of it] will be playing at it. This is one gig that i am not excited about. :(

    I've talked to a lot of my friends on AIM and in person and it has helped me a lot along with venting on here. I've been around for a good 3-4 years and pretty much think of this place as home.

    I'm playing a gig tonight at Youth Group/Young Life type thingy with the drummer and guitarist from Jazz Band. I plan on wearin a black dress shirt [open] with my band shirt underneath. As a memory sorta thingy.

    Thanks for the thoughts guys-i'll pass the word on the people at school. :)


    Jun 1, 2003
    Orlando, FL
    ditto man. words cant begin to express how much pain you must be going through, but all of us here truly feel for you and your friends. :crying:
  15. john turner

    john turner You don't want to do that. Trust me. Staff Member

    Mar 14, 2000
    atlanta ga
    you're a good egg, cam. i'd have been honored to have a friend like you in high school :)
  16. CamMcIntyre


    Jun 6, 2000
    Thanks John and the rest of you guys/gals who have posted.

    At the gig tonight-it was a Young Life/Youth Group event. After we played, the speaker came up and talked about relationships and then said a prayer for David and the rest of the guys involved in the accident. I'm really tired right now-for the past week and a half to two weeks i've been running off of about 6hrs if i'm lucky of actual sleep per night and i'm usually one of the people who get 10hrs.

    The breakup really messed with me and still rears it's ugly head at times-i'm still tryin to make things better with the girl and she is essentialy blowing me off. The way i figure it-she knows i'm here for her if she needs me otherwise-i'm stepping back a bit. So far everyone that knows about it is really shocked that we actually broke up. I'll deal with that though-it's not life threatening-the most it will do is eat up time that i could be using to do something else or mess with my emotions.

    Tomorrow will be the first "red" day since the accident. We are on a block 4/4 schedule. The guys are/were in a few of my classes tomorrow. I'm gonna try and be in the band room for at least most of the day. I only plan on not being there for 1 class [geometry]. I have Wind Ensemble [#1 concert band], Music Theory, Algebra 2, and geometry. I think the main thing i need to do is be strong and let people know that if they need anything to let me know in other words-i need to try and be the support force of the group. [who'd of thunk it-a bassist being the support ;) ] I'll keep you guys updated with the info as i get it.

    Thanks for the show of support.
  17. kserg


    Feb 20, 2004
    London, UK
    Totally agree
  18. mikemulcahy


    Jun 13, 2000
    The Abyss
    I am truly sorry for your loss, life is tough enough to hang onto, even tougher to let go of. Even worse when taken from us in our youth. Your friend will always be with you, in your heart, in your mind and maybe in some way your music.

    Its good to know that you are also there for others, but on the same note, let someone be strong for you. There is no shame in tears.

    You have friends here too.

  19. Very sorry to hear that dude. I too know what it is like to lose a friend, just recently lost one. Hang in there, keep your chin up and you'll pull through it. We are all here for ya if you need us and your friends are there too.
  20. CamMcIntyre


    Jun 6, 2000
    Update on the condition of the guys....

    Josh [sax player/driver], he had a lung removed along with a rib. That is the last i have heard about him. Hopefully will find out more tomorrow.

    Danny [trombone] has been released and is doing much better.

    Heath-is doing better than i thought he would be. He's been at school all week and seems to be handling the situation with remarkable grace and pride.

    Here's my mental update. Today was much better. I've sorta come to grips with more of it along with since i didn't think and analyze it all day, i've felt better. Had a really good conversation with a friend who i haven't talked to much beyond 5 mins every 4 months or so. That felt good and she helped me keep my mind off the crazy stuff while still letting me vent, plus we caught up which is always a good thing.

    Tomorrow is the funeral. 2:00, jazz band is getting out of part of the day in order to play at it. The school is also letting who wants to go to the funeral to go without any question.

    Thanks guys yet again for all the support-i really appreciate it and it does help me deal with everything that is going on.

    That's all for tonight.