A lot of women need more hobbies (slight rant)

Discussion in 'Off Topic [BG]' started by spade2you, Dec 28, 2007.

  1. So my guitarist and drummer were complaining how their significant others pitch a fit when they come to practice. Aside from the kids and their men, neither of them pursue hobbies or other interests. More/less, when they leave, there's nothing to do.

    Flip that around and when us guys are alone, we can figure out a million ways to entertain ourselves and stay busy while having a good time. If I were alone for a week, I'd work out, watch TV, (waste time on TB :p), brew some beer, practice guitar and bass, etc.

    Luckily my girlfriend is really patient and tolerant of my busy schedule, but it worries me a tad that she lacks significant hobbies. I kinda wish I could get her into gourmet cooking like her dad. The man makes amazing food that rivals most of the top local restaurants. (Sorry, I'm slightly hungry at the moment.) Of course, other hobbies would be cool.

    Discuss! Stories, etc.
  2. Bryan316

    Bryan316 Inactive

    Dec 20, 2006
    I find it impossible that a woman doesn't have enough hobbies. The problem here seems to be, their hobbies involve their men doing stuff for them! And when they're gone, they don't get their pictures hung level or door hinges oiled or new furniture assembled.

    All women have hobbies. They're called, "Men doing slave labor." :D
  3. Baryonyx

    Baryonyx Inactive

    Jul 11, 2005
    Marathon Man
    I frequently joke to my girlfriend about her wrecking all my basses because I play them so much. Every time she comes round we spend at least 20 minutes in my spare room while I play a few lines!
  4. I agree. That may very well be what makes or breaks a relationship. I have several friends whose wives are so dependent on them it's rediculous. It's like their husbands are their only source of activity, company, anything!! If they DO manage some time apart, they are on the cell phone every 5 minutes :rollno:

    IMHO, it's VERY important for a woman to have her own life and interests. My wife looks forward to me doing my own thing and vice versa. She has her own network of friends, hobbies and interests. We can go for days, each doing our own thing, maybe checking in with each other once or twice per day. I feel that being able to be apart strengthens a relationship.

    I would go crazy with a woman that relied 100% on me, 100% of the time for company, entertainment, etc.
  5. Pilgrim

    Pilgrim Supporting Member

    Absolutely, 100% AGREED! My wife and I are both professionals, and one or the other of us often travels for up to a week at a time while the other keeps things going in their office and at home. We also have different but compatible interests in out of home activities.

    Part of making a good decision in a mate is finding someone who is NOT dependent on you for things to do, activities, etc. I had no interest in women who didn't have their own ideas, career goals, and ways of doing things.

    IMO the most interesting people have their own interests and find ways to pursue them while getting along with spouse and friends.
  6. Baryonyx

    Baryonyx Inactive

    Jul 11, 2005
    Marathon Man
    Yes, this is very true! Being apart can make you appreciate just how much you enjoy being together, and taking a bit of time off to do your own thing is healthy for a relationship. Heck, for about half of the year my girlfriend is on the other side of England and it takes me a few hours on the train to get to her! I only see her once a month at times!
  7. beaglesandbass

    beaglesandbass Think first, then post? Staff Member Supporting Member

    Aug 14, 2001
    Philly Suburbs
    i've noticed this a lot with some of my former girlfriends.

    luckily (or unluckily), my current girlfriend has an busier schedule than i do.
  8. ryco


    Apr 24, 2005
    It seems a lot of s/o, mine included , let go of their circle of buddies after establishing a relationship.

    I encourage my wife to go see/call her buddies all the time so she can find some entertainment and communication besides just me.

    Us guys seem to keep our buddies (and hobbies) and then get comments when we desire to hang with them for a spell.

    No rant, just weird
  9. need4mospd


    Dec 22, 2005
    I've been trying to get my wife a hobby for some time now. It really worries me that she has nothing to do by herself but read books and watch TV. It seems her friends aren't capable of doing things without their significant others either, so they never hang out. I keep looking for a hobby she can pick up and enjoy on her own, but it ends up being something she needs me there to enjoy.
  10. A good example is a friend of mine that I fish bass tournaments with.........or USED to fish with. In the morning, it takes him about a half our to "say goodbye" to his wife. I guess she feels that if he's going to be gone all day, a days worth of communication must be crammed into that 4am interaction :eyebrow: We don't even get to the boat ramp and the calls start coming it :rolleyes: Then, once the tournament starts he switches to the hands free in the boat, now I can hear the conversation :mad: I hate to say it but the woman needs a life :meh: Unless someone died in my family, my wife woudn't call me when she knows I'm fishing, especially a tournament !!! I would never call and bother my wife when she's at a dog show.

    Needless to say, I'm no longer splitting entry fees or fishing with him anymore. I explained it to him as well but really didn't have to. I go out to get away from the day to day BS, not become part of someone elses :spit:
  11. MJ5150

    MJ5150 Moderator Staff Member

    Apr 12, 2001
    Olympia, WA
    I'm not so sure I agree with some of the sentiments about wives/GF's/SO's getting their own lives. I guess I could maybe see it a little bit in a GF/SO relationship, but it really doesn't fly with me in marriage.

    I married my wife because I want to be with her and spend time with her. Not so I could tell her to go get her own hobbies, friends, and maintain her own schedule. You see, I dang near told my wife to "get her own life" when I started playing bass, but then I decided against it since it was my wife. My wife doesn't sit at home and cry when I engage in my hobbies, she does things to keep herself busy. More often than not, we are doing things together. When I started playing bass, she got a piano and that way we could enjoy one of our hobbies together.

    At the same time, I am in no way in agreement with those wives/GF's/SO's who be calling their man every 10-20 minutes while he is away from home.

  12. I also find that (surely with many exceptions) generally, women pursue fewer hobbies than men. At my high school I am heavily involved in music, multiple sports, student government, clubs, etc. while my sisters each did a sport for a year or 2 and that was it. I don't really know why. I guess most of these things are male dominated. Music surely is, and female athletics just don't click with many girls, while men seem to have an innate desire for sports and competition.

    Student government doesn't seem cut out for either men or women especially, but the vast majority of kids on it are male. I don't know why.

    I'm not about to make a lame false stereotype that women are more apathetic than men or something, but the disparity certainly exists.
  13. louieeadg

    louieeadg uncle petey?

    Jun 13, 2007
    outer banks, nc
    If your lady friend has no hobbies, she'll make a hobby out of you.
  14. Eublet


    Jul 28, 2006
    Guys are often the ones who create this habit. They poor so much into a women during the courtship/dating period that they set the precedent, and then as they (the guys) drift back toward the center where they feel the urge to take care of their own hobbies, the women folk get upset and think they have changed, and that they no longer care to spend time with them.

    But I agree. Women tend to have fewer hobbies. FWIW, I think reading is a GREAT hobby as long as it's something you really enjoy, and not just something you do when there is nothing else around. I used to be an avid reader, and I'd make time for it every day.
  15. disenchant

    disenchant You can't plagiarize yourself.

    Aug 9, 2006
    Elgin, IL
    I think it's weird when women make either their boyfriend/husband or their children their "hobby." It makes for a creepy relationship.

    I wish I had more time for all my hobbies. Mostly I do music, work, volunteer at my church and teach gymnastics. But when I do have free time I work on the book I'm writing (about football), I make dollhouse furniture out of wood, I also knit, embroider, sew and scrapbook. Oh and shopping. That's definitely a hobby!
  16. HiFi


    Apr 20, 2002
    Southern California
    Would 'nagging' be considered a hobby?

    It would explain why they need us men around. :D
  17. MJ5150

    MJ5150 Moderator Staff Member

    Apr 12, 2001
    Olympia, WA
    Hmmmm, what angle are you taking? I'd like to know more about your book, or at least the concept behind it.

  18. ... But, they all have one hobby in common.

    Buying expensive stuff that you don't need, don't have room for, with money you don't have (credit).


    Glad to be single for awhile.
  19. slugworth

    slugworth Inactive

    Jun 12, 2003
    So. Calif.
    >>> A woman should never, ever mess with a man's fishing activities, and she should obey this rule as if it were the word of god...
  20. I would add several more activities to that but you're on the right track :) I check my messages every hour or so but rarely call someone back while I'm on the water.