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A Soundman Dies...

Discussion in 'Bass Humor & Gig Stories [BG]' started by KeithAlanK, Oct 3, 2010.


  1. ...and somehow ends up in hell.

    Satan is happy to see him, because Hell's band has been doing sound from the stage.
    The devil shows the soundman his PA system, which is incredible, and the guy starts feeling pretty good about ending up down there.
    Then the band starts to arrive, and it's John Bonham on drums, Cliff Burton on bass, and Jimi Hendrix and SRV on guitar.
    The soundman asks Satan "How can this be hell? The PA is great and the band is unbelievable!"

    Satan replies "Oh, our singer is a woman".
     
  2. :rolleyes:
     
  3. Funny....... My bar band has a female lead singer who is absolutely great however also has to take the most crap because every eye and ear in the room is always focused on her. We record every performance from the back of the club on a small digital recorder. On playback later we always can hear a couple catty comments directed at her between the songs ..... usually from other women.
    You can't please everybody.
     
  4. behndy

    behndy Inactive

    Nov 1, 2008
    California
    i don't get why that's supposed to be funny.

    it's just asinine. what ****ing year IS this?
     
  5. Epitaph04

    Epitaph04 Always overcompensating Supporting Member

    Jul 5, 2010
    SoCal
    Geez...talk about taking it straight up the pooper.

    I thought it was kinda funny.
     
  6. behndy

    behndy Inactive

    Nov 1, 2008
    California
    hurm...... maybe you can explain why that's funny then? it's not even interesting enough to be offensive. it's just..... dumb.
     
  7. I think he really just wanted to say:

     
  8. behndy

    behndy Inactive

    Nov 1, 2008
    California
    yeah. another intellectual gem.

    i dig on filthy humor as much as the next person, but put a LITTLE thought into it.
     
  9. Epitaph04

    Epitaph04 Always overcompensating Supporting Member

    Jul 5, 2010
    SoCal
    Well I was going to say "a**" instead but I remembered that the rules of this forum state that no profanity is allowed, if I remember correctly. I just thought it sounded better with the "P" word. : )

    But regardless...case in point....
     
  10. baron665

    baron665

    Apr 9, 2010
    Michigan
    It made me chuckle a little. I don't find this to be stupid or offensive. He could of said that the singer was ********, a midget, Stephen Hawking, or something racist. Call me sexist, but I don't really care for female vocalists, especially in rock/metal bands. Of course, there are a few exceptions. I am not saying that women shouldn't sing, but that I'm not a fan of the majority of female fronted bands.
     
  11. Baron Von Vik

    Baron Von Vik

    Jun 11, 2010
    Somewhere in Arizona
    Mojo FunkBasses
    Maybe if he'd said "Jewel is the lead singer..."



    Unfortunately she's still alive.
     
  12. I didn't find it offensive and I don't really care for chick singers.


    I also didn't find it funny.But hey,different strokes.....
     
  13. elzeder

    elzeder

    Mar 19, 2010
    europe
    No serious that was just plain stupid

    There are so many bad singers out there and I guess everybody could come up with a few horrorvisions.

    But just ending it with "a woman"...
    Come on Janis Joplin, Aretha Franklin, Billie Holyday, Nina Simone, Lauryn Hill...please give Women a rest if you're ever planning on scoring...
    or maybe you would fancy a gayish hell...No chicks just D..ks
     
  14. Droot

    Droot

    Dec 29, 2006
    Although she is still alive (just barely) the better reply is " the singer is Yoko OH NO!"
    Droot

    (corrected from my poor spelling "Uko")
     
  15. +10
     
  16. zenrad

    zenrad Supporting Member

    Feb 4, 2009
    Bergen County, NJ
    Uko?

    You mean Yoko?

    Come to think of it - I think that was the original punch line years ago.
     
  17. pharmakon

    pharmakon

    Jun 15, 2010
    Florida
    it's funny because sound guys aren't smart enough to be able to handle the complexities of the female vocalist!

    So it's more of a dig at the sound guy, IMHO
     
  18. No pictures.....

    No female singer.....
     
  19. john_g

    john_g Supporting Member

    Sep 14, 2007
    Pennsylvania
    It would have been funnier if Satan said the the soundman, "all they know how to play is the theme from Who's the Boss"
     
  20. Droot

    Droot

    Dec 29, 2006
    Yes, Yoko... excuse my poor spelling.
    Droot
     

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