Am I the new DeluxeRed?

Discussion in 'Band Management [BG]' started by Phalex, Jul 24, 2012.


  1. Phalex

    Phalex Semper Gumby Supporting Member

    Oct 3, 2006
    G.R. MI
    I just got an offer last night from an established cover band.

    The current bass player is a friend of mine, and I really don't want to steal the guys gig. The band says "He's just not working out". I don't know how the heck he's not working out, because he's been with these guys for years!

    They claim that I'm more fun, and have a better personality. I guess that's a positive thing in both heavy set blind dates and bass players. I think he is probably the more musically talented out of the 2 of us.

    My feeling is that whether I take the gig or not, his days with this band are numbered. If it's an eventuality that he's going to be replaced and I have a few months to polish up on the setlist to make the transition smooth, then why not?

    There is also the matter of the start up band with my old drummy that I said I'd do. I haven't heard anything from those guys in a month or more, so I'm not really sure if there is a project to drop out of.

    Who's got experience bumping a friend from a band? How'd it work out? Still friends? Or mortal enemies?
     
  2. ChrisB2

    ChrisB2 Bass... in your fass

    Feb 27, 2008
    TalkBass > Off Topic
    Haha, you can't be because he's better than everyone so how could you?? ;)

    I have no similar experience so I can't answer your questions, but I'd say you're not "bumping him from the band" if they are indeed going to replace him and give you the job... that would put it on them. Not sure what I would do though, in that spot. I guess it depends on how deep the friendship is...?
     
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  4. fraublugher

    fraublugher

    Nov 19, 2004
    ottawa, ontario, canada
    music school retailer
    Ask him ?

    Maybe he gave notice ?

    Or just do it and sub out the gigs to him.
     
  5. Steve

    Steve

    Aug 10, 2001
    I have some experience sitting in chairs previously occupied by friends and familiars. This is my philosophy and it's my standard position on sub work as basic business ethics.

    I will not under any conditions facilitate the removal of any player from any slot. If however, you choose to remove that individual regardless, once that process is finished, feel free to call me and we'll see if we can work something out.

    I have never "taken someone's gig" I have taken gigs after people I know have lost them.

    To the best of my knowledge, nobody has ever hated on me for that position.
     
  6. Phalex

    Phalex Semper Gumby Supporting Member

    Oct 3, 2006
    G.R. MI
    I wouldn't call it deep, but aside from the singer my old band fired years ago, I am on very friendly terms with everyone on the local band scene. I like our loosely knot friendly musical community, and I really don't want to piss anyone off.
     
  7. DBCrocky

    DBCrocky

    Oct 18, 2011
    Cary, NC
    If you are going to prepare to replace him for a few months without his knowledge, you should also prepare to lose him as a friend when it goes down.

    Perhaps he will be the better man, perhaps he will even be pleased to leave the band and happy you got the gig.

    But there is also a big chance he will feel betrayed and angry and will never want to associate with you again ever.

    And remember, if this band is willing to do this to him, they'd be willing to do it to you.

    Not saying you shouldn't do it if this is an good opportunity for you. Just go into it with your eyes open.
     
  8. Phalex

    Phalex Semper Gumby Supporting Member

    Oct 3, 2006
    G.R. MI

    This has been my philosophy as well. I told them a long time ago: "If he quits, give me a call." Now they are talking about letting him go. I don't think I planted the seed, but I would feel a lot better if he were the one to call me about taking the position.

    I'm just a little twisted over it at the moment.
     
  9. viper4000

    viper4000

    Aug 17, 2010
    Charlotte
    Personally, I'd be pissed for a while. As long as I was given the pink slip before you took the slot. I'd get over it though. Not sure how mature your friend is. He may not come around and you'd lose a friend.

    If he's more than just a good acquaintance, he'll know how you operate (seeing as how you had such a long run with your last band) and he should know you wouldn't screw him over, but you can't pass up a gig either.

    Good luck man
     
  10. Phalex

    Phalex Semper Gumby Supporting Member

    Oct 3, 2006
    G.R. MI
    This had crossed my mind, but to tell you the truth, I'm the easiest guy in the world to fire. I roll with these things very well.
     
  11. Auguste

    Auguste

    Apr 5, 2012
    Good professional ethics
     
  12. bassbully

    bassbully Endorsed by The PHALEX CORN BASS..mmm...corn!

    Sep 7, 2006
    Blimp City USA
    Wait for the dump...then jump.
     
  13. Dantreige

    Dantreige

    Oct 22, 2009
    Wisconsin
    That's a tough one. In the end I'm not sure you have a choice either way how the other guy will react. Roll the dice?

    I left a band with people that I thought were close friends on mine. I did it the best way I knew how. I gave plenty of notice and wished them well. I offered to help the transition anyway I could. It was all for nothing as none of them will speak to me now. I am dead to them. Ten years of "friendship" down the drain.

    I still prefer to be honest and upfront with people, I just don't expect the favor to be returned.

    Good luck!
     
  14. Oneirogenic

    Oneirogenic

    Nov 10, 2009
    It might help ease transition if you tell the band to fire him first then tell your friend that they offered you the position and you wanted "try it out for a bit." If he doesn't take it well and you want to stay loyal in the friend sense you can offer subbing services till they find another bass player. Not everybody has the maturity to handle being canned then have a friend replace them. To some people its like being dumped by a longtime girlfriend then have a friend start dating her. Can be real rough. I see it as a business thing so I wouldn't take it badly. There might also be some serious conflict that your friend is aware of that may warrant him getting fired. Sticky situation.
     
  15. pacojas

    pacojas "FYYA BUN"

    Oct 11, 2009
    MEXICANADAMERICA
    waaaaa,...

    i miss Deluxe Red!!!!:bawl:
     
  16. jive1

    jive1 Moderator Staff Member Supporting Member Commercial User

    Jan 16, 2003
    Alexandria,VA
    Owner/Retailer: Jive Sound
    I guess so. All you chubby white dudes look alike to me.
     
  17. hrodbert696

    hrodbert696 Supporting Member

    I'd talk to the friend and be totally honest with him. Tell him you don't want to screw him and won't take the gig unless it's with his blessing. If his reaction is, "Yeah, I don't think it's working out either and I was going to quit anyway, so go for it," then you're set. If he says, "What? How dare those bastards sneak around behind my back like that!", then don't take it.

    EDIT: Oh, and Phalex.... you will never be HALF the DeluxeRed that DeluxeRed was.... :ninja:
     
  18. pedroims

    pedroims

    Dec 19, 2007
    Michigan
    If he is your friend then talk to him and let him know what is going on, that is what I would expect from a friend of mine, tell me the true and you will always be my friend, sensitivity does not work in men's world.
     
  19. Phalex

    Phalex Semper Gumby Supporting Member

    Oct 3, 2006
    G.R. MI
    Aaaaaaannnnnnd......

    New sig line!


    If I talk to him about it, he's bound to just walk out. That would be bad all around.......
     
  20. the yeti

    the yeti

    Nov 6, 2007
    raleigh, nc
    of course you are!

    i'd be curious to know what it is that's not working out. the guys a good player and been with the band for years?

    i like the idea of feeling him out. you could go all "office space" on him- "...what if you didn't have a job...?"