an odd religious question that shouldn't be close worthy

Discussion in 'Off Topic [BG]' started by The Antipop, Nov 19, 2004.

  1. sorry if this thread is one to be closed, but I doubt it should be.

    If you get married, your husband/wife dies, then get remarried... who do you get to be with in heaven?
  2. bassturtle


    Apr 9, 2004
    Depends on who you ask. According to the bible no one is given in marriage in heaven.
  3. JimK


    Dec 12, 1999

    And what's the big deal about getting 72 virgins as a reward?
    I'm with Dennis Miller-
    ...after 7-8 virgins, I'm gonna want a pro!
  4. Toasted


    May 26, 2003
    Leeds, UK
    Depends what religeon you are / if you believe in anything. Innit.
  5. Benjamin Strange

    Benjamin Strange Commercial User

    Dec 25, 2002
    New Orleans, LA
    Owner / Tech: Strange Guitarworks
    A more important question is do dogs go to heaven?
  6. xyllion

    xyllion Commercial User

    Jan 14, 2003
    San Jose, CA, USA
    Owner, Looperlative Audio Products
    Yep, I saw the cartoon. They do. :bassist: :p
  7. Would you know my name if I saw you in Heaven?
  8. 5stringDNA


    Oct 10, 2002
    Englewood, CO
    I think that in the grand scheme of religious controvery, this is pretty low on the list :D. For the sake of those who have been married 2, 3, 4 or more times and end up in heaven, I really hope mairrage isn't still in effect. Now THAT could be a a divine headache ;).
  9. jammadave

    jammadave Rudderless ship Supporting Member

    Oct 15, 2003
    Wash DC metro area

    Given the typical Christian belief, i.e. not extremist or twisted for convenience or anything, it would stand to reason that your current wife would be the best "contender", but actually, neither, since your marriage vows are only in effect "til death do [ye] part".
  10. Men and their dogs go to the hunting/fishing heaven.

    Women and their credit cards go the the mall heaven.

    So, you ain't gonna see no wife. :D

    Mike :D
  11. Thee


    Feb 11, 2004
    San Luis Obispo, CA
    I hear sheep go to heaven, but goats go to hell.
  12. DigMe


    Aug 10, 2002
    Waco, TX
    The passage he is referring to is Luke 20:29-36 if you're interested in further study.

    brad cook
  13. Josh Ryan

    Josh Ryan - that dog won't hunt, Monsignor. Staff Member Supporting Member

    Mar 24, 2001
    They deserve it more than most of us.
  14. Folmeister

    Folmeister Knowledge is Good - Emile Faber Supporting Member

    May 7, 2003
    Tomball, Texas
    I would imagine it would depend upon what you were supposed to do when you got to Heaven. Having little-to-no experience with religious matters beyond studying The Bible as literature, is there some sort of description of what, exactly, people do when they get to Heaven? If you just kind of lounge around, basking in the glory of God and drinking ambrosia, I guess it's really a matter of quantity over selectivity as I would imagine souls would get rather bored. The more, the merrier in terms of relationships.

    If people/souls were assigned some sort of job, then I would hazard the guess that whatever spouse was closest to your new area of employment. I mean, think for a second. Would Heaven actually be a place for the workaholic/over-achiever? Would souls like Richard Branson (when he goes), or the members of the Flying Wallendas (some already in attendance) spend their time trying to go beyond the limits of the Heavenly Kingdom? Maybe Heaven is more suitable to the middle-management/bureaucrat type?

    And (as if I have not riled enough people already), since there seems to be evidence that the bond of marriage is insolvent upon admission to Heaven, is there any impetus to stay with those we have endured the previous life with? If marriage and love are moot in Heaven, what is the role of our spouses in our after-life. Does not the Kingdom of Heaven provide for all earthly and spiritual needs?
  15. nonsqtr

    nonsqtr The emperor has no clothes!

    Aug 29, 2003
    Burbank CA USA
    In certain portions of the Muslim tradition, a woman who gets divorced must re-marry another man, and consummate the marriage, before she can re-marry her original husband.

    Failure to do so is a violation of the Shari'a and will jeopardize her place in Paradise. :D
  16. Munjibunga

    Munjibunga Total Hyper-Elite Member Gold Supporting Member

    May 6, 2000
    San Diego (when not at Groom Lake)
    Independent Contractor to Bass San Diego
    Wives? Wives? We don't need no steenking wives! We get issued 72 virgins.
  17. Munjibunga

    Munjibunga Total Hyper-Elite Member Gold Supporting Member

    May 6, 2000
    San Diego (when not at Groom Lake)
    Independent Contractor to Bass San Diego
    But seriously, let me tell you how this works. We are spiritual beings. Not just now and after we die, but for all time, before and after we die. We exist with all other human spirits together. Before we are born into our corporeal existence, we agree with our spiritual "friends" to play certain roles in each others' lives. So a group of spirit humans gets together and decides who their parents, friends, enemies and others will be, and then are born into human bodies to live out the earthly life. Our most dire enemy here on earth may be one with whom we have the closest spiritual connection. The reason this works with respect to time is because time doesn't exist anywhere except in the physical world. So your parents can go and be born 25 years before you on earth, even though the decision and departures occurred simultaneously in the spirit world.

    OK, now that you understand and accept this, the purpose of life becomes self-evident, doesn't it? We come here for entertainment. Physical sensations are not possible in the spiritual realm, so we, as spiritual creatures, devised a way to experience the physical world by invading the bodies of this large primate. Further, that is why we must accept that the world is exactly as it's supposed to be. Part of the experience includes the physical and emotional pain absent from the spiritual arena. So good things and bad things share equal importance in the equation.

    Now some of you probably won't buy into the entertainment thing, and for you is the concept that we're here to learn more about human nature applied to physical surroundings. That's cool. Nonetheless, parents, wives, siblings and friends are all part of the same spiritual community, and those relationships bear meaning only here on earth, since we are all unified by love in the spiritual world.

    That's my story, and I'm stickin' with it.
  18. LoJoe


    Sep 5, 2002
    Concord, NC USA.
    I am going to assume the original question was a serious one even though there has been more than an average amount Christian bashing going on around here in a few threads lately. This place has been starting to resemble the Harmony Central Open Jam forum.

    As noted earlier, the Bible speaks to this question as follows in the book of Luke:

    Luke 20 NKJV:

    "The Sadducees: What About the Resurrection?

    (1) 27 Then some of the Sadducees, who deny that there is a resurrection, came to Him and asked Him, 28saying: "Teacher, Moses wrote to us that if a man's brother dies, having a wife, and he dies without children, his brother should take his wife and raise up offspring for his brother. 29Now there were seven brothers. And the first took a wife, and died without children. 30And the second[1] took her as wife, and he died childless. 31Then the third took her, and in like manner the seven also; and they left no children,[2] and died. 32Last of all the woman died also. 33Therefore, in the resurrection, whose wife does she become? For all seven had her as wife."
    34Jesus answered and said to them, "The sons of this age marry and are given in marriage. 35But those who are counted worthy to attain that age, and the resurrection from the dead, neither marry nor are given in marriage; 36nor can they die anymore, for they are equal to the angels and are sons of God, being sons of the resurrection."
  19. DigMe


    Aug 10, 2002
    Waco, TX
    Now pass me the cyanide kool-aid.

    brad cook
  20. secretdonkey


    Oct 9, 2002
    Austin, TX
    Who are you, and what have you done with Munjiunga?