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bass: Beautiful music maker or deadly weapon?

Discussion in 'Bass Humor & Gig Stories [BG]' started by slick519, Jan 13, 2002.

  1. slick519


    Aug 11, 2001
    Salem, Or
    well, my bass has been used for both. im nto sure how "deadly" it is, but it hurts like a bi*ch.

    I was jamming away on the schools xb-100 and this stupid guitar player kept on making fun of me because i was a bass palyer. he kept on teasing me on how little skill is used to play bass, and how easy it is. so, finally, i got fed up with all of it, and took the body end of the bass adn slammed it into his chest. with wonderful results, he fell out of his chair onto the ground and started to wimper because the strap thinky dug into his skin. i then told him to go away, and he peacefuly left and went to cry in the bathroom (well, thats what PROBABLY happend:rolleyes: )

    so, not only the bass musical instument, it is a now considered a high-powered weapon of death!!!


  2. Strangelove


    Oct 29, 2001
    Oh my god!

    That's horrible! ;)
  3. John Davis

    John Davis Guest

    Mar 27, 2001
    Houston, Texas

    THAT is funny.

    But it was still wrong! :p
  4. ChenNuts44


    Nov 18, 2001
    Davenport, IA
    Right or wrong, it was most definitely hardcore...
  5. slick519


    Aug 11, 2001
    Salem, Or
    i know, the way that guitarist treated me.... very wrong indeed!

  6. Another way for a bass as a weapon, try the headstock, the tuning keys are lethal! Especially when you are sitting on a spin around chair, and you spind aorund, and whack someone in the head :D
  7. my two jacksons have some mean ass pointed headstocks... make a great improvised pike :D
  8. John Davis

    John Davis Guest

    Mar 27, 2001
    Houston, Texas
    Vlad, Vlad, Vlad the Impalerrrrrrr.
  9. imagine the damage you could do with an upright...
  10. Pick up a used Travis Bean, then cut & grind the headstock into a large fondue fork.

    Most deadly with cheese
  11. john turner

    john turner You don't want to do that. Trust me. Staff Member

    Mar 14, 2000
    atlanta ga
    was this a gig story or a joke?
  12. that's HILARIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D :eek:
  13. Guess I'll be the one to draw the heat here, but...


    If you can't handle some guitarist (or anyone else for that matter) rattling on out of ignorance then I think you seriously need to get over yourself.
  14. cap


    Aug 8, 2001
    Hickam Hawaii

    i have an XB 100 also...im gonna have to give that a shot:D .....no pun intended:p
  15. Brad Barker

    Brad Barker

    Apr 13, 2001
    berkeley, ca
    i found that story hilarious...

    until my (damn) rational side took over.

    you're lucky that you didn't really hurt the kid and/or he didn't tell someone (as in an adult or teacher). not only would you have gotten into some trouble, the lame guitar player (who may have only been kidding around in the first place) could have had the last laugh...

    on a related note, my friend has the nirvana video "tonight, live, sold out!!!" and there is a part when they are playing love buzz and kurt stage dives. this huge stage guard (i don't know their official title) tries to pull him back on stage, probably misinterpreting kurt's move. now kurt thought this was an aggressive maneuver, so he whacked him over the head with his guitar. the big guy started bleeding from the head and started to try to beat the crap out of kurt. luckily, the guy wasn't injured very badly (it's okay, ma, it's only a flesh wound), nor was kurt.
    definitely not cool.
  16. ConTraBajisTa

    ConTraBajisTa Guest

    Oct 5, 2000
    auburn, ny
    bass guitar is pretty deadly... but try a stand up bass! one time my friend was messin around, i forget what he was saying, but really REALLY making me mad... and ya know that little endpin on the bottom of the bass that hold it up? i dug it into his leg as hard as i could, and he screamed and ran off.
    before band last year, my bf and i had gotten into an argument, and he said something mean and started to walk away (one of the last word kind of things). i had my bass in my arms, and began to turn the other way to go to orchestra, when he turned around and ran back and threw his arms around me and apologized, and as i was manuevering my way to put my arms around him, i clubbed him on accident in the back of his head with my scroll!
    and what about the bow? people walk by when i'm trying to play and get stabbed in their legs. good, they shouldn't have been walking so close! =)

    i'm so evil.
  17. slick519


    Aug 11, 2001
    Salem, Or

    well, if you read my other post "guitarist woes" this is that guitar player.("tink") He is still my friend and all, but we get annoyed at each other every once in a while. he was ok, by the way. it didnt severly injure him in any way, just a little bruise and a gouge in his chest, adn no, he didnt tell on me (bassbrobrad:rolleyes: )

    usually i have a very patient temperament, but one too many bass jokes gets on a guy nerves, ( i think ou know what i mean) and that is actually the first time i have ever lashed out at an individual liek that (im only 14, there is plenty of time for that:D )

    today, me and "tink"( the guitar player) are getting along fine right now.

  18. John Davis

    John Davis Guest

    Mar 27, 2001
    Houston, Texas
    As long as he's ok............................hit him another time.
  19. Dave Castelo

    Dave Castelo

    Apr 19, 2000
    next time whip him with your B string (or E) :D

    but remember:


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  20. cap


    Aug 8, 2001
    Hickam Hawaii
    Do what Mr. T Says

    Eat Drugs and dont do Vegtables

    mabye i have it backwards:rolleyes: ;) :D

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