Bassist jokes involving the eclipse eveyone is going crazy for today

Discussion in 'Bass Humor & Gig Stories [BG]' started by powmetalbassist, Aug 21, 2017.

  1. powmetalbassist

    powmetalbassist Supporting Member

    Guy: Look its the eclipse

    Bassist: Naw...that's just my travel rig.....blotting out the sun.

    I know, not very good. give me your best TB!
    dickfitts, Jay2U, Ellery and 3 others like this.
  2. Spidey2112


    Aug 3, 2016
    (Wife, to husband): Honey, do these jeans make my rear look huge?

    (Husband, to wife): No dear, but those jeans are blocking my view of the eclipse.
    Last edited: Aug 21, 2017
  3. Stumbo

    Stumbo Guest

    Feb 11, 2008
    Bassist walks into a bar...oops, missed the eclipse.
    Jay2U, Honch, ThePresident777 and 4 others like this.
  4. Stumbo

    Stumbo Guest

    Feb 11, 2008
    Bassist shopping on, where are all those e-clips that everyone is talking about?
    P-oddz, GSPLBASSDC, Fletz and 15 others like this.
  5. 1st Bass

    1st Bass

    May 26, 2005
    Forest Grove, OR
    Passerby to bassist: "So, is that the sun, or the moon, or both?"
    Bassist: "Ummm...I dunno, dude, I don't live around here!"
  6. RoadRanger

    RoadRanger Supporting Member

    Feb 18, 2004
    NE CT
    Q: Which one is the bass player?
    A: He's the one that looks like an eclipse (dressed in all black and round like a blimp) :wideyed:.
    cchorney, KB1UHJ, btmpancake and 3 others like this.
  7. fhm555

    fhm555 So FOS my eyes are brown

    Feb 16, 2011
    I played in a band where one of the guitar players was married to a really big girl, she stood 6'6" tall and was just big all over. Because of her height she didn't look too awfully pudgy but she was packing some serious poundage. She was also kinda sorta our manager, always booking us jobs and such.

    Anywho the drummer used to say we got hired for a lot of outdoor events because we brought our own shade.

    Oh and here you go...

    Bass player comes in from his day job and his wife askes how his day went. "About like usual" he replies, "except everyone said they were going out to watch an eclipse, so i went with them, but i don't know how they thought they were gonna see anything because this big black dot almost covered the sun for a few minutes. I guess the eclipse left while it was dark because everyone went back in when the black dot went away."

    Yeah...I know...i'm leaving...
  8. Spidey2112


    Aug 3, 2016
    Living in central Ohio can be ecliptical, in itself... I couldn't tell the difference between yesterday and today... might as well include tomorrow, as well...
    GBassNorth and Stumbo like this.
  9. Ewo

    Ewo a/k/a Steve Cooper Supporting Member

    Apr 2, 2008
    Huntington WV
    Last week I kept seeing warnings not to look directly at the eclipse--but I misread totality as singularity. So I went home and unplugged my computer.
    Last edited: Aug 22, 2017
  10. BassFishingInAmerica


    Jul 24, 2014
    I could see the eclipse about as well as I could hear your bass over the guitar.
    TuneIn, lpcarter, mikewalker and 4 others like this.
  11. Stumbo

    Stumbo Guest

    Feb 11, 2008
    On stage, Bassist keeps telling his guitar player, who moves around a lot, "don't get ecliptical on me".

    After BP starts yelling, GP says "what do mean 'ecliptical' ?"

    BP yells, " you're blocking the audience from my view."
    pcake, mikewalker, HolmeBass and 2 others like this.
  12. EdwardofHuncote

    EdwardofHuncote I Still Dream of Jeannie Supporting Member

    Aug 21, 2013
    Not sure if there's a good joke in it, but here's a couple pictures I took of the partial eclipse a couple hours ago.

    2017-08-21 15.16.42.jpg 2017-08-21 15.17.02.jpg 2017-08-21 15.17.37.jpg

    (as seen from Southwest Virginia)

    *I agree, everybody was a little over-the-top about the event. The Weather Channel had people hyperventilating for goodness sakes...


    Sure, it was a cool thing to see, but geez folks... take a breath and do some deep knee-bends. :rolleyes:
    Last edited: Aug 21, 2017
    BassPilot, Atshen, dave64o and 16 others like this.
  13. TheAnalogKid

    TheAnalogKid Yer Doin' GREAT!!!!

    Dec 7, 2011
    Here you go... 20170821_13_11_43.jpg
  14. Nev375


    Nov 2, 2010
    *bassist sees solar eclipse* "Welp, guess I better change my flats."
    cchorney, KB1UHJ, Jim Carr and 27 others like this.
  15. Wolfenstein666


    Dec 19, 2014
    *stares directly into sun
    Stumbo likes this.
  16. gln1955

    gln1955 Supporting Member

    Aug 25, 2014
    Ohio, USA
    <-- They said not to look at the sun.
    cchorney, Inky13, Nev375 and 3 others like this.
  17. I'M BLIND!!!!
    Stumbo likes this.
  18. I wish I had the time to drive to Kentucky and see the total eclipse.
    Yango likes this.
  19. tubedude


    Jan 19, 2015
    Lord, just a sign will do. If we should fire the drummer, blot out the sun this afternoon.
  20. Member8675309

    Member8675309 Inactive

    Aug 19, 2017
    Nashville, TN
    Seeing the eclipse came the realization that in twenty years of playing, my combined solo time equates EXACTLY to the time of the Eclipse Totality......2 minutes and fifty eight seconds.

    But, whatever, I bought a pick to commemorate the event because I know it's the only thing I can buy that'll remain in pristine condition.

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