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Best Movie Quotes!

Discussion in 'Off Topic [BG]' started by SlavaF, Sep 7, 2002.

  1. SlavaF


    Jul 31, 2002
    Edmonton AB
    Hi, fellow bass players. What, in your opinion, are the best movie quotes of all time? If this has been done recently, I will delete the thread. I will start with a few from the Austin Powers movies:

    Dr. Evil - Welcome to my underground lair. It is long, hard and full of seamen!

    Frau - 5!!!! 4!!!! 3!!!! 2!!!!-
    Dr. Evil - Stop, begin the countdown at 30!
    Frau. 30!! 29!! 28!!...15!!!
    (Dr. Evil closes door)
    Dr. Evil - Ok, when the doors close, just say go!

    Austin - This coffee smells like s**t!
    Basil - It is s**t, Austin!
    Austin - Oh, good, then it's not just me (drinks Fat Bastard's stool sample)
    Austin - It's a bit nutty...:eek:

    Post your favorites!
  2. mans0n


    Jun 15, 2002
    "so i winked at myself, shook my hand and said the number 13 in german then i left"

    -Steven Wright in his short film One Soldier, talking to himself as an old man
  3. Amber Atkins - I don't eat shellfish. Mom always says, "Don't ever eat nothin' that can carry its house around with it. Who knows the last time it's been cleaned." She should know.

    Gladys Leeman - He sells reproductions! His furniture's as fake as my orgasms!

    Pastor - And so, dear Lord, it is with deep sadness that we turn over to you this young woman, whose dream to ride on a giant swan resulted in her death. Maybe it is your way of telling us... to buy American.

    All from Drop Dead Gorgeous, a mockumentary that's just *so* much better than Spinal Tap (IMHO, of course)
  4. HardRockZombie


    Jul 4, 2002
    "You shoot me in adream, you better wake up and appologize." - Mr.White
  5. Reservoir Dogs is one of my favorite movies. There are so many great Tarantino lines and dialogue, but most of the stuff is way beyond PG-13.
  6. notduane


    Nov 24, 2000
    " NO! ''

    (Marcel Marceau in Mel Brooks' "Silent Movie" :) )
  7. Any spinal tap yes.

    and then these:

    The Exorcist: "It burns! It BURRRRNNS!!" :p

    Waynes world (aaahh so many): "Its my eye isnt it?" "what? there is nothing wrong with that *points* WEIRD looking eye"

    Forget which movie.. probably Monty Python: "whats that.. a head on the road?"

    "this is the machine that goes PING!!"


  8. Ah yes Mel Brooks, the king of timeless movie lines.

    "Funny, she doesn't look Drewish."

    "Keep firing ***holes!"

    "Excuse me sir, can you help us?" -roman solder
    "Sure, what are you looking for?" -guy
    "A pack of Trojans!" -roman solder
    "Gee, I just ran out" -guy
    -History of the World 1

    and lets not forget the greatest movie series ever created... Evildead

    "Good or bad, I'm the guy with the gun."

    "I said all the words exactly! Hmm, basically."

    "Shop smart! Shop S-mart!"

    "I got news for ya buddy, as of now you are ruller of exactly two things. Jack and ****, and Jack just left town."


    "You got ugly, baby."

  9. Woodchuck


    Apr 21, 2000
    Atlanta (Grant Park!)
    Gallien Krueger for the last 12 years!
    "Never rub another man's rhubarb!" - Jack Nicholson as the Joker

    "What kind of a world is this, where a man who dreses up as a bat, gets all my press?!" - Same guy.

    Witness: "You shot an unarmed man!"
    Clint Eastwood: "He should've armed himself!"
    from Unforgiven

    Witness: "You shot him in the back!"
    Lou Gossett Jr.: "His back was to me!"
    from some cowboy flick he was in.

    And thess from Snatch:
    by Brad Pitt: "Periwinkle blue! Caravan!"

    And every line from the 3 black guys. They were hilarious!
  10. "Silent Movie" (1976)

    Mel Funn: [on telephone] Hello, Mr. Marceau? Je suis Funn. How would you like to be in the first silent film to be made in Hollywood in over 50 years?
    Marcel Marceau: Non!
    Studio Chief: What did he say?
    Mel Funn: I don't know. I can't speak French.

    - Wil
  11. Ther are quite a few, but here is a start...

    *Deep breath*
    "Good! There's oxygen on this planet!"
    -Flexi Jerkoff in Fleshgordon

    Inmate: "...and when there was no meat we ate fowl; and when there was no fowl we ate crawdad; and when there was no crawdad to be found, we ate sand."
    HI: "You ate what?"
    Inmate: "We ate sand."
    HI: "You ate sand?"
    Inmate: "That's right."
    - Raising Arizona

    pops: "A big-a$$ dog bit me right in my a$$!"
    craig: "I told you, I told you, I TOLD YOU."
    pops: "You didn't tell me S***!"
    - Friday

    pops: "Everytime I come in the kitchen, you in the kitchen! In the god d*** refrigerator! Eatin' up all the food. ALL the chitlins... ALL the pig's feet... ALL the colleygreens... ALL the hog-mows. I wanna eat them chitlins... I like pigs FEET!"
    - Friday

    "Listen! Do you smell something?"
    Dan Akroyd in Ghostbusters

    Drexl: "He musta thought it was whiteboy day. Is it whiteboy day?"
    Thug: "No man, it ain't whiteboy day."
    - True Romance

    (connery impressions) Sick Boy: "Do you she the beast? Have you got it in your sites?"
    Rent: "Clear enough Missh Money Penny, thish should preshent no shignificant problemsh."
    - Trainspotting

    "Well, he's always been lacking in moral fiber. He knows a lot about Sean Connery. That's hardly a substitute."
    - Trainspotting

    (out the window to the neighborhood children) "Go home to your mother! Doesn't she ever watch you? Tell her this isn't some communist day care center! Tell your mother I hate her ! Tell your mother
    I-HATE-YOU !!!"
    - Desperate living

    (answering phone) "Hello? What number are you calling? You've dialed the wrong number! Sorry? What good is sorry? How can you possibly repay the last few seconds you have stolen from my life? I HATE YOU ! Your husband, your children, ALL YOUR RELATIVES !!!"
    - Desperate Living

    Cracker: "Nobody sends you a turd and expects to live, Momma."
    - Pink Flamingoes

    Jack: "When some guy walks in and smacks the back of your favorite head up against a bathroom wall and asks if you have paid your dues, you just remember what old jack burton says at a time like this. Have you paid your dues? Yes sir the cheque is in the mail."
    - Big Trouble in Little China

    Jack: "Well, ol' Jack Burton always says...
    Henchman: "Who?"
    Jack: "Jack Burton......... Me!!!"
    - Big Trouble in Little China

    And I'll end it on...

    Prison guard: "One Timex digital watch, broken. One unused prophylactic. One solied."
    - The Blues Brothers

  12. air_leech


    Sep 1, 2000
  13. Many I can't remember, but here are some of my favorites:

    "Here I come!"-The Royal Tenenbaums

    "Zang"-Waynes World 2

    "Tis a fleshwound!"-Monty Python and the Holy Grail

    "We're on a mission from God"-The Blues Brothers

    "I'm from Holland, isnt that weird?"-Austin Powers 3

    "Cause I'm a madman!"-Airheads
  14. Brendan

    Brendan Supporting Member

    Jun 18, 2000
    Austin, TX
    "Of course the shortcut isn't easy. If it was easy, it'd just be The Way" Road Trip singular best use of logic I've ever seen.
  15. BigBohn


    Sep 29, 2001
    WPB, Florida

    Pure classic. Classic.
  16. It's 106 miles to Chicigo. We got a full tank
    of gas, half a pack of cigarettes ,it's dark, and
    we're wearing sunglasses. Hit it. - The Blues Brothers.

    You can't really dust for vomit. - This is Spinal Tap.

    Apes in cages...yeah, riiiiggghhht. -Planet of the Apes
  17. Woodchuck


    Apr 21, 2000
    Atlanta (Grant Park!)
    Gallien Krueger for the last 12 years!
    From Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels:
    "When you dance wit the devil, you gotta wait until the song stops!"
  18. "Dude, I think I just filled the cup."
    -Jason Mewes as Jay in Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back.
  19. I tried to stand up and fly straight, but it wasn't easy with that sumbitch Reagan in the White House ...

    But sometimes your career gotta come before family.

    Nathan Jr. accepts me for what I am and I think you better had too. You know honey I'm OK, your OK, that there's what it is.

    You tell him I think he's a dang fool Ed. You tell him I said so, H I McDonnough, and if he wants to discuss it he knows where to find me-- in the Maracopa County Maximum Security Correctional facility for men, State Farm Road #31 Tempe Arizona, I'll be waitin'!

    ... I even caught myself driving by convenience stores ... that weren't on the way home.

    I'll be takin' these Huggies, and uh, whatever cash ya got.

    I'm talkin' about sex boy, what the hell are you talking about. I'm talking about l'amore, I'm talkin' that me and Dot are swingers ... as in to swing. I'm talkin' about wife swapping. I'm talkin' about what they call nowadays open marriage.

    ... but the doctor explain that her insides were a rocky place where my seeds could find no purchase.

    -Raising Arizona
  20. Matt Till

    Matt Till

    Jun 1, 2002
    Edinboro, PA
    "I guess I'll just stay home and lick the cat's butt." -Wayne (Wayne's World II)

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