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Choose me a new me

Discussion in 'Off Topic [BG]' started by Rockin John, Apr 28, 2006.

  1. This is a re-work of a previous thread thead I deleted earlier, for personal reasons. The guy who posted a reply earlier, "Thanks", your idea was good and I will follow that up.

    After 30 years of bad marriage I find myself at just over 50 years old and in need of a serious change in my life. I feel - and therefore look - rather frumpy, tired and drab. My clothes, manner, hair, weight ... indeed the whole me needs a damned good shake-up.

    I'm particularly keen to improve my clothes which I think will improve my confidence, which I think will help me enormously!! I'm very much a jeans + shirt bloke but will consider most options. What I definitely don't want to do is try to turn a 50+ man into a 30+ man.:eyebrow: I'd like to be casual but smart and crisp with a modern style but to suit my age. I hate the 'tracksuit and trainers' look and would not wear it. Other than that .....

    Thing is, I just don't know what blokes in my position are wearing, or how to choose clothes at all for that matter.

    I think I'm fairly young in outlook. I think I'm no more than average looking. I've already modernised my hairstyle and think it suits me quite well. I'm making a fairly good attempt to shed some 2, 1/2 to 3 stones overweight (about 35 to 40 pounds).


  2. MJ5150

    MJ5150 Supporting Member

    Apr 12, 2001
    Olympia, WA
    What do you want us to do? Suggest brands of clothes? Styles? Diet tips? Hair style ideas?

    If you have a TV, turn it on and watch something like Entertainment Tonight to see what all the "cool" people are looking like. :D

  3. guy n. cognito

    guy n. cognito Secret Agent Member Gold Supporting Member

    Dec 28, 2005
    Nashville, TN
    Don't buy any clothes until you have lost the weight. With that much weight, you won't fit into any of your new clothes. As far as fashion, you could get a million different opinions. TV is a great place to get an idea of what's "in." You could also make a trip to your local shopping mall and look around is some of the more modern men's clothing stores.
  4. SnoMan

    SnoMan Words Words Words

    Jan 27, 2001
    Charleston, WV
    Come on guys.

    John is asking for some assistance.

    What daily activities to you enjoy? You'll want to choose something appropriate.

    What's your hairstyle? Does it have any length? If so, consider getting a shorter cut. I find I feel rejuvinated and invigorated after a good cut and shave, for me it's a feeling that can last a short term, then you go again.

    Have you put much thought into how you want to go about losing the weight?

    A new you is a nice motivation, but lets set up a few small goals, nothing major, and see about taking steps towards them.

    Most importantly, IMO, is feeling good about yourself. Meaning, know why you're doing this. Don't take it as a journey you'll have to trudge through, you'll never progress that way.
  5. DigMe


    Aug 10, 2002
    Waco, TX
    You're right. Let's be serious.

    1. Watch the famous "Pork Chops and Applesauce" episode of the Brady Bunch. This has all you need for changing yourself into something more desirable.

    2. Have you considered the 'tracksuit and trainers' look?

  6. Lazylion

    Lazylion Goin ahead on wit my bad self!

    Jan 25, 2006
    Frederick MD USA
    Beware of advice from smartass Americans.

    It must be quite a relief to get out from under a 30-year unpleasantness. I only went for 18 years with my ex, but I think I have some idea of your new freedom. Congratulations! Let your friends take you out & celebrate!

    Are trainers the same thing as sneakers/tennis shoes?
  7. ric1312

    ric1312 Banned

    Apr 16, 2006
    chicago, IL.
    Well as far as losing weight I've always struggled with it trying diets. Mind you I'm not super fat just had some jelly around the belly that made shape less that what it could be.

    I've found that most of the diets are bullcrap. Counting calories is bullcrap, eating smaller portions of what you already eat is crap.

    I've found the whole very little or no carbohydrate thing works great. You burn off fat for energy, instead of using carbs for energy. You lose fat quick. But, the first few days suck as you are in carb withdrawal, and feel shaky.

    I go zero carbs, but that's extreme, if you stick to just 22 a day thats good to, when you lose the weight you want you can add carbs back in if you don't go bonkers on them.

    I don't have any medical conditions like diabetes or heart problems, so no carbs is no problem for me.

    I also don't believe the claims that it's bad for your heart or your health. I feel much healthier when I'm eating this way, and my bloodpressure is much better. But, I don't steak and sausage every day, like some people assume you do on a non carb diet. I like eggs, cheese ( some carbs but not much), hamburger, cold cuts, chicken breasts......

    A little body building trick I learned too is that if you want to slim up quick, get up in the morning and do 20-40 minutes of cardio/running something to get your heart rate up. but, you must do this before you eat anything. This is what the really cut bodybuilders do. You've slept all night, so have burned off all your food. When you wake up your empty, so if you do cardio right there you are burning fat.

    If you wait and do cardio say sometime after breakfast or lunch you are burning off what you ate instead of fat, and except for getting stamina and a heathier heart aren't doing anything to really lose fat.

    And not that you would want to become a body builder at 50 but, lifting some weights and gaining a little muscle would help too. The more muscle you have the easier it is to burn fat, and it makes you feel good.

    Hope this has helped.
  8. rsgars


    Aug 6, 2003
    NY State
    I think for guys our age, any kind of sharp but casual pants (meaning not jeans) and a golf shirt looks pretty good. Just when your picking out the golf shirts get classic looking ones, not the funky stuff that the pro's are actually wearing.

    Two great things about golf shirts, there is a wide variety of colors and you can wear them with a sport jacket to look a little more dressed-up.
  9. MJ5150

    MJ5150 Supporting Member

    Apr 12, 2001
    Olympia, WA
    Wow ric, there's some controversial advice floating around your post.

  10. I am also slowly doing the same thing, minus the weight loss. I am 19, and for the past 5-7 years its been dirty band shirts, torn jeans and dirty shoes. I started to wear collard shirts all the time now(mostly like a golf shirt or button up), and even this makes me feel better and I feel that I look better and more professional. I also started to stop wearing base-ball hats, and turn now towards a fedora, pork pie or one like what Samuel L Jackson wears, except i wear mine forwards. I feel more respected now, and that as I get older slowly I realized I don't want to be dressing like that.

    I am one of those guys who loves to put on a suit for a night and love the feeling of getting dressed up.

    My only problem is my hair, right now its long, and I can't decide how to cut it. I am thinking of getting like a ceaser cut, if thats what it is still called, or soemthing shorter so its easier to maintain, looks better, and does not stick out from under my hats.

    When shopping for clothing, I would suggest goin to outlet stores, and stores such as WInners if those are in your neighbourhood. You can find nice clothing for much cheaper and then you also save yourself some money for that new bass.;)

    I hope this helped at least a little, although I more stole your thread, sorry.
  11. guy n. cognito

    guy n. cognito Secret Agent Member Gold Supporting Member

    Dec 28, 2005
    Nashville, TN
    To put it lightly. Even Atkins, which is consider bs by many health care professionals, doesn't recommend a NO carb diet. Ric, you need to be REAL careful with that diet. It seems quite ill-advised and I would recommend discussing it with your doctor.

    I lost 60 lbs through a combination of diet and exercise. Dieting to me was nothing more than cutting down on crap (fried food, regular soda, etc). I exercise 6 days a week; 3 days weights and 3 days cardio. I have kept the weight off for over two years. I currently have about 8% body fat, which is pretty amazing for a 32 year old man with a desk job. Moderation and diet is key.

    Back on topic. Casual pants and golf shirts were mentioned. These would be quite fine, but I would add that jeans are very much in right now. The washes have changes, as have the general shape and length, but they are currently quite popular with people of all ages. If you want a younger look, consider getting some good quality jeans that have a slight flair at the bottom.

    Do you have a store like Banana Republic in your area? Their clothes seem to be well made, modern without being too trendy, but expensive.
  12. Woodchuck


    Apr 21, 2000
    Atlanta (Grant Park!)
    Gallien Krueger for the last 12 years!
    Red drop top Porsche!!! :hyper:
  13. Ericman197


    Feb 23, 2004

    It's impossible to avoid all carbohydrates; he probably means less than 10 grams per day.

    The diet itself is completely harmless. I've been doing it for several years and I am quite healthy. I'm a pre-med student, so I vaguely know what I'm talking about. My mother and father are both physicians, neurologist and orthopedist respectively. They are also on the diet and highly recommend it.

    There isn't a need for large amounts of carbohydrates in our diet because they are only used as a source of energy. All that someone really needs is protein and fat. I've yet to hear of a bread product that contains any useful nutrient that isn't easilly substituted.

    The general consensus that doing Atkins will cause you to drop dead is wrong. As a precaution, I've had blood tests done, and all of my levels are excellent. In fact, I would argue that eating a high carbohydrate diet will have a far worse effect on cholesterol levels. My cousin-in-law had been eating a nearly all bagel diet for several years and had terrible cholesterol and triglyceride levels. Her doctor even convinced her that she was doing the right thing. My father suggested she try Atkins, and a few days, all of her levels returned to normal.

    High carbohydrate foods are necessary for society to exist, but are unnatural. Humans are meant to eat meat, vegetables and fruit (roughly in order of importance).

    Cut out all cake, pasta, bread, cookies etc. Eat vegetables in moderation. Avoid starchy vegetables (potatoes especially). Eat fruits in extreme moderation. In the past two weeks I've been very strict with myself so that I can lose more weight. I was 195lbs two weeks ago, I'm 188lbs now and I'd like to be 170~180lbs. My diet consists primarilly of salad: lots of lettuce, some carrots and cheese on top, a few little tomatoes and cucumber slices, bleu cheese dressing and a lot of ham bits. I also eat meatballs with a lot of mozarella cheese on top, sometimes some balsamic chicken (chicken with peppers, onions and cool stuff), etc. Sometimes I have tuna or egg salad. Once you're on Atkins maintenance (which, by the way, you need to do: you will gain the weight back otherwise*) you can be pretty liberal with the carbs as long as you watch calories and don't eat any white products (whole wheat is ok in moderation but avoid white bread, rice etc.).

    *This applies to all diets for that matter: You cannot ever stop a diet. If you do, you will gain all the weight back and then some.
  14. Hello, guys and thanks for taking the trouble. :D

    The reason I'm making this journey is for me although, currently, wife and I are still together. I'm fully focussed. I've prolly been a middle aged bloke since I was 20!!! :meh: :meh: and it's time to kick off the rubbish and get out there. The reason I started it, though, is down to a good friend, mentor and all round nice lady. I call her, Ma'am. :eek: No ... it's purely platonic ;) well, for the moment at least. ;) ;) ;) :hyper:

    My diet is quite balanced and healthy already. I eat a sensible amount of pasta, salads and the like. Always grill stuff, never fry. Some years ago I lost weight (the weight I'm now trying to loose again !!!) I just cut out crisps (chips) biscuits, cakes, pastries, beer, chocolate, etc. I lost about 3 stone (50pounds) before over about a year. I'm just doing that again. No mad dieting, no diet plans, just cutting out the cr*p.

    I've been wearing my hair short for about 6 months. I just asked the stylist to help me look more modern. I've only just started experimenting with gels and wax and stuff. I prolly look a bit of a tw*t at times, but I gotta learn about all this stuff. :ninja:

    With my clothes on, being looked at from the front, I prolly look fairly OK wearing my old, rather baggy stuff. But I feel the need to buy some clothes just now that are a little more modern / stylish to help me with the mental / confidence thing. Something praps a size smaller, you know ...

    But I don't have the cash for any fancy stuff. I have found, though, that some supermarket brands are quite stylish and offer very good value for money. For certain, until, I've lost more weight, they'll do very well. I bought a decent shirt from there just yesterday. I'ts a bit odd looking at myself in the mirror ... I still think like a frump but there's a more modern guy looking back at me. Strange! :bag:

    Woodchuck, you demonstrate exactly my problem. Red Porche? ... I've always wanted a Land Rover ... LOL LOL.

    (Thanks Ma'am) *Winks*

  15. guy n. cognito

    guy n. cognito Secret Agent Member Gold Supporting Member

    Dec 28, 2005
    Nashville, TN
    This statement is exactly why I don't buy into these fancy diets. I have maintained my weight loss for 2 years WITHOUT sticking to any sort of fancy diet. I just try to eat healthier, avoid the crap and exercise. I don't put too much thought into how much carbs vs how much protien I eat, because I don't have to.

    My comments weren't meant to disparage Atkins specifically, because that's been done to death and doesn't need to be repeated. My comments were meant to address the misunderstanding and mis-implication of the diet by Ric.
  16. There are plenty of people who lose weight just by "eating sensibly," but there are a lot of people who need ot work from within a construct to achieve their weightloss goals.
  17. Thor

    Thor Gold Supporting Member In Memoriam

    You don't have to buy Armani to look decent.

    Over here, we have department stores (magasins) that can
    offer good clothes values on decent quality stuff. I always
    get my stuff on sale when they run them.

    I NEVER wear schlumpy stuff to work, even though others do.
    I always have clean and well pressed casual pants and a
    dress style shirt with collar and cuffs.

    This style has transferred to Saturdays and Sundays as well.
    I simply won't be seen in public in torn, dirty or ill fitting
    clothing. I am simply amazed at the number of men out there
    that are poorly dressed, particularly here in the US.
    Sweatpants and T-Shirts don't make you look good, they
    make you look retarded.

    Congrats on improving your lifestyle and looks.

    It goes without saying that a new bass always adds style
    and confidence. I recommend a vintage 65 Burns Shadows
    Bass with the scroll head and Tr-Sonic pickups. Assuming
    you can even find one. :ninja: ;)
  18. Don't_Fret

    Don't_Fret Justin Schornstein

    Dec 10, 2003
    Agreed. A shower, Dockers and a golf shirt already put you waayy ahead of the curve.
  19. It's really poor of me I guess, but I've just never bothered about how I look. Clothes were there to keep me warm not to make me look ... well, well, to make me look good or bad or indifferent. Hair ...? well it just grew on my head ... :eek:

    Yeah, come to think of it, what a terrible way to approach life.

    Don't want to appear concieted but I'd like to be, well, fancied by a woman I suppose is as good a way as I can think of putting it. You know, just to be found mildy attractive would do ... :bag: LOL

    A friend said she didn't want to wake up dying one day, then regretting she never did X Y Z. That's a bit how I feel about me. There aren't going to be that many more chances to get out and do it ... And I don't want to wake up dying one day regretting my life. A bit profound but there we are!

    Gonna try the supermarket in the week to see if I can find some nice jeans. You know, I popped into a couple of fashionable clothes shops today. They must be taking the Mickey. You can't get jeans over a 36" waist. Jees, it's 30 odd years since I was a 36 ... But never mind, I'll get there in the end.:D :D

    Thanks for all the input folks.


  20. Lazylion

    Lazylion Goin ahead on wit my bad self!

    Jan 25, 2006
    Frederick MD USA
    Sorry, I misunderstood. I withdraw the congratulations on your freedom. Hold off on the celebrating. :(

    I wish you a lot of luck.

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