I have a very good friend of over 2 decades (we're so close we call each other cousins) whose wife is abusing him. She's not abusing him physically, but she is doing it mentally, emotionally, and financially. She's even had a few affairs on him. It's actually gotten so bad that he feels guilty and is blaming himself for it. He's also scared to death he'll never get to see his daughter again. In fact, the guy she's whoring around with told her, "I can't be with you right now because I have to get some things in order first. I need 6 months." He knows all this yet he keeps running back to her. He always uses the common rationalization excuses of "I love her," "I love my kids, so I do it for them." We have all talked to him in depth about this and I went into detail on the cycle of domestic abuse with him to help him better understand that he is in the circle. I am at a moral crossroads here, because a very large part of my being is tempted to call one of those domestic abuse hot lines you see that state "if you or someone you know is the victim of domestic violence call us." Because it might be able to help him out. The other side of me is saying "shut up, don't do it." You see, there's a part of me that does believe he's a grown man and if he chooses to stay in that marriage, then it's on him. Also, if he were to find out I made the call, he'd obviously be pissed at me, perhaps temporarily, perhaps the remainder of his days. His mother and my mother are also best friends. Making the call could possibly drive an irreparable wedge in their friendship. Not to mention destroy the bonds that I have with his mother, brother, and sister.