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Dealing with BAndmates

Discussion in 'Band Management [BG]' started by PinkFloydDan, Aug 20, 2005.

  1. PinkFloydDan


    Jul 4, 2005
    This is the second time I have jammed with this band: www.soundclick.com/thousandbucks and I've got some good and bad stories, but right now I just want to hear some advice.

    I met these guys in 2003 and after 2 years they kicked me out of the band because of personality differences. I put a lot of dedication into the band, as I really picked up a bass a year before I knew them and this was my first real gigging band. I drove 70 minutes to jam with them many times and they never once left the comfort of their own place.

    Things have changed now in that short year we didn't jam. I bought a house and they bought homes. Now, we jam at my place of work. And they bitch and moan abou thaving to drive the 20 miles to the jam spot.

    It really annoys me to hear them bitch as I, like I said, drove 70 miles (one way) 3 to 4 times a week to jam with these guys and learn. They won't jam more than 2 a week at this place and all the other jams have to be at their places, and we can't plug in.

    Now, it still seems those personality differences exist. Here is an example--on our music site above, I created the tune Syncho de Mayo Palto ALto, and I really liked the bass line. After we played it 4 or 5 times, the drummer and gutiar player (best friends since junior high and connected at the hip) said they wanted to speed it up--we tried it and it sounded awful--so now they say "You know, let's just forget the song. It doesn't sound right to me."

    It really irritated me because 1. the recording is the first time we really ever played it and 2. I love the tune. It's a cool bass line. And it sounds great at the current tempo, plus the keys player loves it. BLAH

    Point is, these guys are pretty lazy, they don't like to learn anyone else's stuff and they don't stay sober when they jam--rather they don't like to. I like to stay clean when practicing and gigging. They rather be stoned.

    We have potential for a decent local scene. How do I get these guys to wake up without getting booted from the band? Don't tell me to move on because that won't work as my confidence in my bass playing isn't exactly tops. I tried practicing with other groups when they booted me and I didn't fit in to any of the bands I played with. I did do one gig with a group, but it was not my cup of tea and I left shortly after.

    I don't know what to do, as I want to get these guys to wake up and be a bit more respectful to their other bandmates---but that makes me the *******.
  2. el_Kabong


    Jul 11, 2005
    Well if you don't want to leave and your confidence is a bit low stay with them while you tryout with other bands. Try and get what positive experiences you can from the current band and don't invest too much emotion in the situation. The experience of auditioning/jamming with other bands will really help you develop as a player. Don't be too hard on yourself if you cock up an audition, so what, it's all good experience, so treat it as such. The more you do it the better and more confident you will become. Look at it this way, unless you plan to stay with the current outfit for the rest of your life you gotta leave sometime.
  3. Time Divider

    Time Divider Guest

    Apr 7, 2005
    Unless you are utterly dependant on income from this current gig, I'd get the hell out. Sounds to me like these guys are mild head cases (and stoners to boot). You don't need that. Nobody does. Get out now and practice by yourself to keep improving. Audition for other bands, and don't be hard on yourself if you fail. If you don't fail, it means you're not really trying very hard or pushing yourself.

    Leave these losers behind. Now.
  4. remo


    Jan 15, 2005
    yeah mate.. just get out. If this is what its like when you guys are just rehearsing, imagine what it would be like touring, recording an album etc etc... It would be a living hell...

    They sound like dickheads so let them get stoned and do whatever they like. Find another band and move on!!!