Bass Player Dec' 03 issue- turn to the back page for words of wisdom from Chi Cheng; "Playing bass is like making love to a woman" -followed by a rambling piece relating his sexual and musical experiences, something about Zen Buddhism, blah blah. for those of you who didn't see UK's The Fast Show, Swiss Toni was a character who ran a car showroom, but when showing the ropes to a new employee always managed to compare various tasks (eg. selling a car, washing a car, making coffee etc.) to "making love to a beautiful woman"- incorporating various puns along the way. http://www.bbc.co.uk/comedy/fastshow/characters/swiss_toni.shtml so if he was talking about bass playing, he'd say "you preferably need a longscale, make sure you're tuned up to pitch" and probably something about "losing interest when you unplug"- any other puns?