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Dumb, Dumber, Dumbest...

Discussion in 'Off Topic [BG]' started by secretdonkey, Jan 28, 2003.

  1. secretdonkey


    Oct 9, 2002
    Austin, TX
    j'ever have one of those days?

    1. I go to the Toyota dealership to buy an air filter for my car. I ask for a filter for a 2002 MR2. The guy says "I don't think there *is* an 02 MR2." He asked someone else who agrees that there is no such car. I looked around me and asked, "uh, I am at a Toyota dealership, eh?" He had me go outside and write down the VIN number of my car. Finally got my part...

    2. Driving home, I see a bumper sticker on a car. A professionally printed, not homemade bumpersticker. This is what it said: "Only fools believe the bias [sic] liberal media." Whatever your politics, ya gotta laugh at that one.

    3. Played a short set tonight at a local pub & grub. Asked the waitress for a Shiner draft. She looked at me and asked, "Draft - is that the one that comes in the mug?"

    :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes:
  2. PhatBasstard

    PhatBasstard Spector Dissector Supporting Member

    Feb 3, 2002
    Las Vegas, NV.
    How about this one:

    I'm in Guitar Center today. I ask the pimple faced stoner behind the counter "Do you still do 2 for 1 on guitar strings?" (I needed a set for a beater guitar I've got).

    With a look of utter confusion on his face he slurs "We've never done that."

    "OK. No problem." I say "What is your deal on guitar strings."

    In a completely serious, oblivious face he says "Half off of list price..........." :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes:
  3. 5stringDNA


    Oct 10, 2002
    Englewood, CO
    In my experience with guitar center i have decided that they find teh dumbest college student they can and ask them if they want a job there. All I do is mess around with their stuff and leave. :D
  4. Hey, not all of us are stupid :D

    I also go to Guitar Center to fool around with the basses and leave. I played a MIA P and a Stingray 5 the last time I was there. Both good basses.
  5. Yogi Bear

    Yogi Bear

    Aug 14, 2000
    Quite a few yeas back I worked retial for a large paper company that cateded to printers, and the occasional walk-in to buy paper for a report, resume, whatever.

    One day this young girl, maybe 19 or 20 walks in dressed in her best hippie wannabe attire. As part of our spiel when we'd run someone through the register we would ask them for their zip (postal) code for demographic reasons. As I asked her this she gave me this sly look and said " I really don't feel too comfortable giving out my zip code." I about laughed at her. She must have thought it was some kind of zip code comspiracy, we would find the blond girl in zip code 801XX and bug the crap out of her to buy our merchandise.
  6. Bard2dbone


    Aug 4, 2002
    Arlington TX
    I had the exact same car dilemma, a looooooooooong time ago. I had a '74 Datsun 610 ( my first car, I called it the Albatross, as in around my neck.) I got backed into at school so I went to get a new signal lens at thenewly renamed Nissan dealership. They kept insisting that Datsun didn't make a '74 610. I would point out at the car and say "Then give me a lens for that figment of my imagination in the parking lot."

    But as far as encountering stupidity, my favorite is the time I had to weigh a patient at the hospital. A lot of medications are given by weight, so we need an accurate weight on admission. And when the patient is under a year old their clothes are a much larger fraction of their weight, so we weigh the babies naked. I had explained all this to the mom and thought she got it. I ended with the phrase " You wouldn't weigh yourself with a fifty pound coat on, would you?" The kiddo wouldn't be still on the scale and was getting so active on it I was afraid she would throw herself off, so I told the mom " Okay just hold her. I'll get the stand-up scale and weigh you holding the baby. Then I'll weigh you without the baby and subtract you to get the babies weight."

    MOm looked conerned and said "Do I have to strip?"
  7. xyllion

    xyllion Commercial User

    Jan 14, 2003
    San Jose, CA, USA
    Owner, Looperlative Audio Products
    Depends on how good looking she is. ;)
  8. Brendan

    Brendan Supporting Member

    Jun 18, 2000
    Austin, TX
    BWAH HA HA! :D
  9. Petebass


    Dec 22, 2002
    QLD Australia
    How's this? I heard it on the radio...... some guy went through an "orange" light. A policeman pulled him over and booked him for going through a "red" light. He was obviously pretty upset and tried arguing but that never works.

    When the cop had finished booking him, he took off as fast as he could, only to see another orange light several hundred meters down the road. He's learned his lesson so he hits the brakes - hard. Guess who smashed into the back of his car? That's right, the cop!

    That's dumb.
  10. embellisher

    embellisher Holy Ghost filled Bass Player Supporting Member


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