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Ex is holding my stuff hostage...help!

Discussion in 'Off Topic [BG]' started by pigpen02, Apr 15, 2005.


  1. pigpen02

    pigpen02

    Mar 24, 2002
    Anyone have any insight to share as to my rights in this situation:

    Broke up w/ girlfriend of 3+ years last friday, went to go pick up some of my things today (planned to have uhaul and family over this weekend later to get everything else) and she has changed the locks, and has the house garrisoned by her nasty family and friends, who are preventing me from entering. She also has my tax return, which needed to be sent today.

    Has anyone else ever been in a situation like this, and does anyone know what i can do to get my things? I simply can't fight off a crowd while carrying boxes, basses, and furniture. Somebody please give me some ideas.

    Thanks.
     
  2. DigMe

    DigMe

    Aug 10, 2002
    Waco, TX
    I'd contact my local sheriff.

    brad cook
     
  3. what a bitc...mean thing to do. try being reasonable or something.
     
  4. bassmonkeee

    bassmonkeee Supporting Member

    Sep 13, 2000
    Decatur, GA

    Yep.
     
  5. bigbeefdog

    bigbeefdog Who let the dogs in?

    Jul 7, 2003
    Mandeville, LA
    1. File for an extension for your taxes. You can get an automatic four-month extension just for the asking (although if you owe, you'll have to include a check with the request). Get it in the mail today. It's Form 4868; open this up, print it and fill it out:

    http://www.irs.gov/pub/irs-pdf/f4868.pdf

    2. Assuming the items in question are clearly yours (no questions about ownership, no "we bought it together" sort of thing), call the sheriff and tell your story. They're the ones who can help you repossess your stuff without being harassed by the friends and family.

    If you end up on "Judge Judy", let us know when the episode airs.

    (You really ticked her off, didn't you? :meh: )
     
  6. Toasted

    Toasted

    May 26, 2003
    Leeds, UK
    Im with Brad. Way to go by the way. I hope you didnt do it with a post it.
     
  7. DigMe

    DigMe

    Aug 10, 2002
    Waco, TX
    I think he left her a "We're finished" medal.

    brad cook
     
  8. Kelly Lee

    Kelly Lee Yeah, I'm a guy! Supporting Member

    Feb 17, 2004
    Marana, AZ, USA
    That and the tax extension. Do the tax thing first and have it ready to send then get the sheriff and go get your stuff!
     
  9. Toasted

    Toasted

    May 26, 2003
    Leeds, UK
    So, are you going to photoshop it, or am i?
     
  10. MJ5150

    MJ5150 Terrific Twister

    Apr 12, 2001
    Lacey, WA
    No way to reason with the people at the house? I have to believe there is at least one responsible adult involved in this who can see that there is something you need from the house.

    If not, looks like you need to call the police. That is too bad. Perhaps one of the law enforcement professionals who post here could give you some insight on how to exactly handle things.

    -Mike
     
  11. pigpen02

    pigpen02

    Mar 24, 2002
    Thanks all, i will be calling the local po-po tomorrow morning. Hopefully, they can send someone over to protect me while i load up the truck.

    I thought i did the deal as gently and kindly as humanly possible, with a long sit down talk, and offers to speak whenever she wished and it were reasonable to do so (i.e., no long teary phone calls at work, not at 4 a.m. on a tuesday, etc.), and by offering to pay the bills next month if need be. But, hell hath no fury....I've always known she was bit unhinged, maybe i got a clue when she tried to hack me up w/ a screw driver!

    Hopefully, someone here in law enforcement, or the legal profession, can give me the exact nature of my rights and how to go about things before i call the law.

    Thanks.
     
  12. 'JC'

    'JC'

    Mar 14, 2000
    Why the break up?

    This is why you get your stuff out first, then drop the bomb.
    BTW Is this strictly her place, or in your name as well?
     
  13. pigpen02

    pigpen02

    Mar 24, 2002
    Her place, she owns it. I would have liked to have gotten my things first, but couldn't stand staying another minute. She's also given away my beloved dog, who i rescued from the pound just before execution :(

    The break up is because, in addition to spending up my hard earned $$ on drugs, sitting in front of the tv doing those drugs all day everyday, and being a miserable hag, she....well, that just about sums it up. I've known her since i was 16 (i'm 29 now) and we've always been close, and i care for her regardless of what she does, but i can't be her therapist/father/enabler any more.

    There isn't anybody rational at the house: i've always been under the impression that her mother and step father adored me, but apparently that was only so long as the $$ kept flowing. When i went over today, they were awful to me. I don't get how people can be so two faced, but poor character is its own reward, and i'm all about moving on. I was all excited, too, as i got the keys to my new place today and was prepared to start moving in. as it is, its sitting empty, and i'm crashing with family until this gets resolved.
     
  14. 'JC'

    'JC'

    Mar 14, 2000
    The dog thing is going too far.
    I would have just reported her on the drug thing right then and there.

    Hope it works out quickly man.
     
  15. fourstringdrums

    fourstringdrums Decidedly Indecisive Supporting Member

    Oct 20, 2002
    San Antonio
    Sorry to hear about that man :( As above, I would file for an extension for your taxes. But I have to ask, as I've had people calling all day at work asking for the IRS, USPS and Tax Offices, so I've been wondering, why didn't you file them earlier?

    Anyway, I would definately call the police. You have a right to your stuff. Atleast before you call the cops, I would personally tell her that you're going to call the cops if she doesn't let you in to get everything. That may change her mind for the time being without actually bringing the cops into the picture.

    Best of luck.
     
  16. From my understanding, the police are usually fairly reluctant to get involved in domestic disputes. Not to say they won't help, but it usually ends up too messy for them to really be effective.

    I used to share a place with a woman who was drug dependant and it nearly drove me insane - the noisy all nighters, people ringing at any hour of the day, arguments, paranoia. I just had to get out of there. Sorry to hear your problem, mate, hope it all works out.
     
  17. pigpen02

    pigpen02

    Mar 24, 2002
    Thanks. I've already informed her and her family of my intention to bring the law with me, if at all possible; the response was of the "ooh, we're scared" variety. Some people just don't get it: its not to frighten anyone, its to prevent my getting a screwdriver in the neck, or some such horrible thing, and to finally be done with all this mess. I really hope an officer can come over and at least order them to let me start packing/moving. My uncle's and a few heavy-handed friends can see to my safety, if it comes to that. Its just a matter of getting inside and not having a pitched battle.

    And yeah, should've filed earlier, but....that's me.
     
  18. pigpen02

    pigpen02

    Mar 24, 2002
    She's not even a party drug abuser: just mopes, sits in her chair, watches bad tv, complains, abuses, etc. Maybe if there were some life in her it would have been more tolerable. Just like the walking dead, though, until now....
     
  19. fourstringdrums

    fourstringdrums Decidedly Indecisive Supporting Member

    Oct 20, 2002
    San Antonio
    I'm sure we've all been there. Staying in a bad relationship either thinking that you can deal with it or change the situation seems to be something that people naturally go through.
     
  20. pigpen02

    pigpen02

    Mar 24, 2002
    I think there was smidgen of pride involved: ironically, i work in the mental health field, and have some experience counseling substance abusers. Its a strange world.