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Fish and Wildlife *** ????!

Discussion in 'Bass Humor & Gig Stories [BG]' started by the goose2005, Feb 11, 2006.

  1. the goose2005

    the goose2005

    Dec 3, 2005
    This is a true story ! I am not making this up !!

    Recently picked up Quantum 4 from EBAY. It was being shipped from Florida to my home here in Alberta Canada.

    While anxiously awaiting its arrival I got a phone call from customs somewhere in the US.

    " yes, we have a rather large package for you sir, unfortunately the proper paper work has not been adhered to and thus must go through fish and wildlife for inspection and authorization "

    Fish and Wildlife !!! Why I said !!

    " sir she said all wildlife products shipped internationally must proceed through proper channels and since this falls under this category delays are to be expected. It says right on the box sir " fragile bass "

    Ah pardon !!! Its a guitar not a fish !!!!!:rollno:

    " sir it says bass " not guitar !

    Have you ever seen a " bass " ,wide-mouth or not, that FREAKIN BIG !!:confused:

    I begged her to open the box, she would not I pleaded with her to open the box, she still wouldn't

    Now I love you guys down in the US but may I ask what the educational qualifications are for a customs position in the US is ?

    The bass finally arrived after 5 weeks with yep you guess it with a fish and wildlife declarations adhered to the box.

    Somebody at F&W must be a bass player for he had written " nice 4 banger " on the papers


    The Goose
  2. That is hilarious. About the intellectual qualifications to be in the organization, I bet that she just didn't want to be fired for not checking something she knew about. Damn beauracracies. (sp ?)

    I once subscribed to "Bass Masters" Magazine from one of those school magazine sale drive, then had fishing magazines in my mailbox for a year. :rollno:
  3. hahahahahaha
  4. dharma

    dharma Srubby wubbly

    Oct 14, 2005
    Monroe, Louisiana
    Funny. very Murphy's Law.
  5. Kitsapbass

    Kitsapbass What key is this?

    May 26, 2005
    Bremerton, WA
    as a government employee, I am SO not suprised.

    I have to deal with this kind of stuff all day, when there are better ways of doing things, but you can't violate the process order, thereby breaking the law, and you can be punished by prosecution. Sorry, man - that's just how it goes.
  6. pulseczar


    May 7, 2004
    San Jose, CA
    Let this be a lesson to us all. When shipping a bass, make sure it says Electric Bass, or Bass Guitar, 'less the government seize it thinking it was a monster fish. =)
  7. steve21

    steve21 Banned

    My favorite part is the 'Nice four banger'.

    Hilarious story... glad at least you got it.
  8. Diggler


    Mar 3, 2005
    Western PA
    Electric Bass, second cousin to the electric eel...
  10. Could have been worse. They could have impounded it for being over the regulation size.:D

    You have to wonder what the guy at the F&W inspection station thought when he opened the box, "What the...."

    Rock on
  11. Trevorus


    Oct 18, 2002
    Urbana, IL
    That's a good one. That's a story for the TB record books.
  12. txbasschik


    Nov 11, 2005
    Leander, Texas
    Here is the speculation that I'd bet my lunch money is real...

    Your Customs Idiot Woman is a redneck who can't conceive of anything that says "bass" not being a fish. She has an attitude, and didn't care what you said, she wasn't going to open that box. She can't allow for anything that is outside the box of her tiny little mind.

    Your FW-4-Banger Dude knows The Fishing Redneck. He's making you feel better, and he's making a point about her, because you *know* they have a copy of that paperwork, and he is telling everyone a funny story about what an idiot Fishing Redneck is.

    There, think I nailed it?

    I'm just glad you got your bass. Look up bureaucrat in the dictionary, and there you may find a picture of Fishing Redneck! Especially if you cross-reference "dumb" with her entry. ;-)

  13. Trevorus


    Oct 18, 2002
    Urbana, IL

    I wouldn't quite put it that way. If she were to operate on her own, she'd lose her job. If you don't run it by the book with government related stuff, you can get in some serious hot water.
  14. bassbully43


    Jul 1, 2005
    LOLOL thats great...my user name is Bassbully which is two sided one i play and love the bass guitar and two i am a diehard Bass fisherman who retired from tournaments a few years ago and now am concentrating on my bass playing and band. Sad to say i made alot more money fishing for Bass than playing Bass.:D Wouldnt the box of really smelled bad if you shipped a Bass by mail? good old U.S. gov for ya!
  15. Phil Mastro

    Phil Mastro

    Nov 18, 2004
    This is terrible. And hilarious.

    Thing is tho, it's not the US customs that check incoming packages to Canada, it's the Canadian customs that do that. :crying:

    I woulda paid to see the faces on those people at the Fish and Wildlife organisation.:D
  16. It probably took so long cause the F&W people were daring each other to open it first.

    Imagine the stink of a giant bass after sitting in their warehouse for a few weeks .....
  17. txbasschik


    Nov 11, 2005
    Leander, Texas
    Technically, she *was* going by the book. She probably just did not want to hear, "But its a bass guitar, not a fish, just look!"

    In Customs, they are allowed to open a package to check its contents. I've seen them do it, in the Harlingen ariport, and at the Border. She could have done so. But she decided this was a fish, so she didn't.

    And besides which, I was engaging in facetious speculation. Don't take it too seriously.

  18. Joe Gress

    Joe Gress

    Dec 22, 2005
    Pueblo, CO
    That just made my day a whole lot better!
  19. BigJH


    Jan 20, 2001
    Cincinnati, Ohio
    That is hilarious. Great story, sorry it took so long for you to get your bass. At least someone realized you had a good bass in the package.
  20. Rooney


    Jan 5, 2006
    Kenton, Oh
    just think..........
    speaking as a bass fisherman and a bass player........
    they could have made you throw it back..:p

    jk............I'm glad you finally got your bass.

    Hello everyone.:)

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