Psst... Ready to join TalkBass and start posting, make new friends, sell your gear, and more?  Register your free account in 30 seconds.

Flunking in style.

Discussion in 'Off Topic [BG]' started by Josh Ryan, Mar 4, 2004.


  1. Josh Ryan

    Josh Ryan - that dog won't hunt, Monsignor. Staff Member Supporting Member

    Mar 24, 2001
  2. canopener

    canopener

    Sep 15, 2003
    Isle of Lucy
    Feh.
     
  3. SlavaF

    SlavaF

    Jul 31, 2002
    Edmonton AB
    :D some of that stuff is actually quite funny! But I don't understand why he would screw around on a big exam like that just to post it on his website for a few laughs... :meh:
     
  4. Mike Money

    Mike Money Banned

    Mar 18, 2003
    Bakersfield California
    Avatar Speakers Endorsing Hooligan

    Maybe the dude really didn't know jack?
     
  5. You gave me an idea...I have Science tomorrow.mwhaha
     
  6. Ty McNeely

    Ty McNeely

    Mar 27, 2000
    TX
    Anybody here seen "The Thermodynamics of Hell"??

    The Thermodynamics of Hell

    The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well.

    Bonus Question:

    Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

    Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools off when it expands and heats up when it is compressed) or some variant.

    One student, however, wrote the following:

    First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time so we need to know the rate that souls are moving into Hell and the rate they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell.

    With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

    This gives two possibilities:
    1) If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

    2) If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

    So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year, that "... it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you," and take into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in having an affair with her, then #2 above cannot be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and will not freeze over.

    This student received the only A on the test.
     
  7. Mike Money

    Mike Money Banned

    Mar 18, 2003
    Bakersfield California
    Avatar Speakers Endorsing Hooligan
    I think hell is in the shape of a lemon.
     
  8. Ty McNeely

    Ty McNeely

    Mar 27, 2000
    TX

    And your brain is the size of the seed :D


    All in jest, Mikey :D
     
  9. Well that was interesting....i do like his explanation of the curvy graph comparing Time and Grams....he should have got half marks for that because he did explain...just not the time and grams bit
     
  10. Ty McNeely

    Ty McNeely

    Mar 27, 2000
    TX
    "Add contents of packet and return to boil whilst stirring continuously. Simmer on a medium heat for 10 minutes.
    -Sauce will thicken on standing.
    Serves 4."


    :D:D:D


    Classic!
     
  11. hateater

    hateater snatch canadian cream

    May 4, 2001
    Eugene, OR
    "Fork + Shoe = Spleen"
     
  12. Mike Money

    Mike Money Banned

    Mar 18, 2003
    Bakersfield California
    Avatar Speakers Endorsing Hooligan
    Ya. Johnny Apple Seed, biatch!



    Wait. That makes no sense. I'll be going now...
     
  13. Josh Ryan

    Josh Ryan - that dog won't hunt, Monsignor. Staff Member Supporting Member

    Mar 24, 2001
    Yeah, I was wondering why he answered that one straight too.
     
  14. Wrong Robot

    Wrong Robot Guest

    Apr 8, 2002
    "justify answer: guess"

    bwahahaha