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Funniest band-breakups/quitting the band stories

Discussion in 'Bass Humor & Gig Stories [BG]' started by Relic, Nov 13, 2006.

  1. Relic

    Relic Cow are you?

    Sep 12, 2006
    Robbinsville, NJ
    Was just scanning through some of the threads in the "Band Management and Performance" section, lots of posts about bands breaking up and folks quitting and such. Normally that sort of thing can be stressful and not at all funny, but have any of you actually had a situation that you later could laugh hysterically about?
    my quick story - about 15 years ago, I had gotten together with a couple of guys and we were trying to form a covers + originals band. Wasnt going too well, personalities didnt mesh, neither did outlook, work ethic or musical ability, long story short I called the guitarist/lead vocalist one evening and just told him (nicely, mind you) that I was leaving..dead silence on the other end. I ask him if he's still there, all I get in response is a sniffle.. ***? Are you CRYING!?? The guy (a 25 year old male) goes on this long teary tirade that music sucks, and he's quitting guitar permanantly and how he just laid out over $1000 on a Rick 330 (?) how he'll never be in a real band and be famous.... then the guy hung up on me! talk about the sensitive musician type
  2. Guitarplayers don't have the bassists rocksolid mind. :cool:
  3. That dude needs to get a grip. That is probably a sign of deeper psychological issues and it is a really good thing you got away!

    My story - (detailed to DEATH in my journal entry here) is not really funny in the "HAHA" sense, more in the "eyebrow up" sense.

    I was in a cover band that had sub players for every member except me. Sure, it made me feel loved and all, but it also put a great deal of pressure on me to be available for everything, all the time. So I proposed that we start looking for a sub for me, just in case, you know, I get sick or some crazy thing like that... No, no, no... can't do that! Too much trouble... No time to take on such an exercise... no way!

    Ok... Sorry, but I have to leave then. I'd really like to stay, but having to be available for everything, all the time is too much to ask of a family-man, father, career dude. So - here's my notice.

    Since I agreed to stay until they found one or until the last gig I was on tap for they make no effort to find a replacement. My guess is that they figured if they did NOT find a replacement I would keep going... hmmm...

    Long story short - I had to bail on a few gigs prior to the end of the schedule due to family issues - they found a bass player to fill in - he worked out really well! I asked if he would take the gig so I could be done, he did, I am done!

    Now I am the sub! So now every member of the band has a sub and everyone is coverd in case of emergency... Funny... had they simply found this guy a long time ago when I suggested we find a sub there would never have been all the drama of me "quitting".
  4. anonymous_111514

    anonymous_111514 Guest

    Oct 24, 2006
    haha we had this kid who wanted to audition for our band who played a lot of jazz lfusion type stuff like us but we really didnt want him in because he was a jerk to everyone and really wasnt that good, so we tell him to just improvise over what we play, well we decided to play a little Rage Against the Machine - killing in the name of. and he just walked out
  5. We brought in a new guitarist when my band decided to go from Hard Rock/Metal to a more mainstream direction. He came in and told us that our current singer was horrible and he could do better. I told him he was hired as a guitarist and if that was a problem, that maybe he should begin to look elsewhere. He said he was sorry and that he wanted to stay. Every song he went from singing back up vocals to trying to out-do our singer. Well, as luck would have it, our singer had to leave due to personal problems and I started auditions for a new singer, needless to say...he was pissed. I hired, what has become an incredible singer (still with us) and after practice, having a few beers, talked about the music we used to do and that's what our hearts were really in to. The new guitarist said he was cool with that, and started learning alot of the heavy stuff that we already knew. He was learning pretty quick and went out and bought a dual rec head and a Marshall cab to play his crappy guitars through,

    The beginning of the end...
    One week before our first show with him and our new singer, (we threw him a bone and let him sing lead vocal on one song). We were packing up our gear and staging it for the show. I told him, put your stuff in your gig bag, and stage it all in front of the door. I looked over and he had a wad of cables, a few pedals and some other stuff in his hand and placed it on his amp. I said "Yo, where's your gig bag"? He replied, "I don't have one" So I toss him a Coors Light padded 30 pack beer cooler and said "You do now". I stressed to him over and over how important it was to have all the gear in one spot so our sound guy would not forget anything. He assured me not to worrry about it. I then asked, "you did get strap locks like I told you to, didn't you"? (45 years old, been allegedly playing for 25 years and never used strap locks) He answered "Nah, I don't need them"

    The gig....the end.
    5 band show and we're in the middle at one of the biggest A rooms in the area. I was there early because I was supplying the bass backline for the other bands (2 national acts, 2 local bands) He shows up about 40 min before we supposed to go on, walks up to me and says "Dude, where's my guitar"? I said "How do I know, it's not my responsibility"? He said "dude, stop kidding....where is it" My now angered reply was "Did you have it f-ing staged in front of the f-ing door like I f-ing TOLD YOU TO"!!!!!!!! He said "Yeah, I did" I then stormed out the door, got in my truck and sped like a maniac to the practice room, walked in and there was his guitar on the opposite side of the room, in the far corner. I picked it up, sped back to the club and handed it to him, he opened his mouth and I just "shushed" him, If he said anything I would have beat him half to death. I get my bass strapped on with about five min to spare, chugged a beer, killed a smoke and it was "game on". 1st song, I couldn't even hear him, that didn't bother me (my 2nd guitarist was dead on) 2 nd song he spent plugging and unplugging his gear wondering what was wrong, 3rd song....you guessed it, his cheapo Les Paul went to the floor, (no need for strap locks) 4th song was the one he was singing, he starts the song (guitar intro) and it is very apparent that the trip to the floor has sent his guitar grossly out of tune. My other guitarist realizes this and starts playing in hopes that he will have a moment of clarity and stop playing and just sing, letting the other guitarist take care of the guitar duties. Nope, doesn't happen, plays the entire song out of tune. My embarressment has found a place that it has never been to before. To make this novel end somewhere, the rest of the set went....well, lets say OK, and we did cover his screw ups ok.

    End of the night, he says to me, "Just have Bob (sound guy) bring my gear back to the practice room", My reply, "No, you should probably just take it home"
    He knew...
    I had to cancel a few gigs and get our new guy up to speed, it was nice to have most of the summer off after 2 years of gigging pretty steady, but it was definatly the right decision.
    The lesson learned... Age, image, gear, ability...none of that matter if your an idiot.
  6. I don't have a definite story to tell,just an observation.Every band that I've ever been in has been broken up by a guitarist............what does this mean.........help I need guidance and counselling.Sorry.....I was rambling then,pass me a beer instead.
  7. Guitarists:Smart enough to play their instruments,stupid enough to think they're important.
  8. I dumped my friends epeen blues/sologuitar-i-know-best-dont-play-anything-diffiuclut-that-is-my-job band.

    He didnt talk to me for 6 months :D
  9. db4usa


    Mar 5, 2006
    St. Louis, MO
    #1 Dude...I couldn't have said it any better.

    I once had one (guitarist) in my old band. Secretly, he gave an ultimatum that either I was canned or he walked. The rest of the boys were savy and up until the last moment, sandbagged him into believing he was the winner. Well, as stated above, he wasn't found to be that important and was surprised to be sacked. The look on his face was well worth the smug looks and comments that I'd endured from this arrogant little prick for several weeks. I still chuckle when remembering it all. Thanks for starting this thread.
  10. ldiezman


    Jul 11, 2001
    A friend of Mine here In Nashville was playing for a National Touring Country act that ( i shouldn't mention the name) but he and other just top notch players had formed that band. Before the second album came up he had submitted songs he had co-written to be cut on the album. The front man for this band asked if he could change the name on one song then he would love to have it on the album. My guy said sure and right after that the front man said "well I want a third (songwritting credit) for this." and my friends response was "there were two other guys writting with me on this i can't give you a third"... front man says "well I work for a third so thats what I want" and my friend just looked at him and said "I quit." and walked out the door.

    Now this had been a long time comming. But this guy is one of the most saught after guitar players in Nashville. He is unbelievable. I've played a few gigs with him and its unreal to listen to him play...

    Needless to say not 4 days after he quit this band He got a call to play with Lynard Skynard... which he is currently still doing.
  11. VanillaO

    VanillaO Poop?

    Oct 14, 2006
    Toronto, Canada
    They wouldn't at all be associated with Lynyrd Skynyrd, would they? :D
  12. squierplayer120


    Nov 17, 2004
    I left a band because when we brought in a new guitarist, I was trying to work out a bass line at practice, and the new kid was soloing over nothing. The drummer took his side and told me to shut up. I kept going...he kept goofing off and soloing over nothing, and the rhythm guitarist (who always played his guitar at his knees) tries to take me down. I took off my bass, cracked my knuckles, and tackled that little b*tch. The drummer got into it, and in the fracas, I knocked over a cymbal stand. I then grabbed my bass, jacked a bunch of picks from him, and left.
  13. ldiezman


    Jul 11, 2001
    No not at all
  14. MakiSupaStar

    MakiSupaStar The Lowdown Diggler

    Apr 12, 2006
    Huntington Beach, CA
    I typed out our whole story with our old singer. Full on drama. Just highlighted it. Deleted it all. It's just drama. You've all heard it before.
  15. Oh man, I have to use that as my sig! You don't mind, do you?
  16. no problem, I'm honored!:D
  17. Wesley R

    Wesley R Gold Supporting Member

    We asked a guitar guy to leave in 1974. In 2005, he called the lead guitar and starts making death threats about him ruinning the band etc. Turns out guitar guy is under therapy and stopped taking his meds.
    Every once in a while I hope and pray for him.

    Best of Luck,
    Wesley R.
  18. Wow, that's a long time to carry a grudge...over three decades.
  19. LeftyLB70P


    May 4, 2005
    Athens, Ga.
    I had been playing with a neighbor for a few months and slllloooowwwwlllyyy things were almost beginning to form into an official band when a genuine, work most weekends, gig came along. So I called my buddy (he had moved so I wasn't being weird, he was now across town) and told him that I had really enjoyed the stuff that we had done but this opportunity was kinda too much to pass on so I had to take it. "Sure thing" he says, "so can we practice on Thursday then" (it's Monday) :eyebrow:

    "Uh, no I mean that I really can't devote myself to 2 things so I am going to hook up with these guys full time" (me, also lay on the good guy talk b/c I genuinely like him and all). "Oh, ok, well when do you want us to get together?" :confused:

    "Dude, I am quitting! I am sorry, it's nothing personal, I just need to move on" ok, at this point I have been on the phone for like 30 minutes and believe it or not, it hit him like a ton of bricks! :eek:

    I felt bad, but man it was funny.

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