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getting gay bashed

Discussion in 'Off Topic [BG]' started by Joe Nerve, Jan 10, 2004.

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  1. Joe Nerve

    Joe Nerve Supporting Member

    Oct 7, 2000
    New York City
    Endorsing artist: Musicman basses
    just remembered this stuff responding to another thread.

    it's gotta be really tough being gay.

    because i'm a musician (i guess) and have at times dressed much differently than the others around me, i've been subjected to gay bashing on more than one occasion.

    once, i was in greenwich village with a friend and was approached by someone asking if i was gay. i said, "no". he continued, "oh come on, you don't like a little .... once in a while (or something like that). i started to walk away, and then noticed he was with a bunch of other guys and they started yelling "you f...ing fa..ott", and other such crap. they were totally looking to hurt someone.

    another time randy (my guitarist) and i were walking in the neighborhood, i think our hair was colored or something, and some guy sitting outside a laundromat started yelling at us to go do things i can't write here. randy wanted to confront him. it was too stupid to even try and reason with guy - he kept yelling really lame homophobic stuff. i didn't feel like fighting or arguing.

    another time i had my pink pants on and a car full of girls drove by. one of them screamed out "NICE PANTS!!!!!.... YOU F...ING FA..OTT!!!

    there were other incidents too.

    anyone else ever have to deal with this????
  2. blow them away with a low F#
  3. JMX

    JMX Vorsprung durch Technik

    Sep 4, 2000
    Cologne, Germany
    I've never seen gay bashing at concerts. Never in the rural area where I grew up, and definitely never in Cologne. Cologne is probably the biggest (male) gay community in Europe. Appr. 10+ of the male population is (more or less) openly gay. Cologne also has a tolerant tradition of "live and let live", so nobody looks twice when you see gay couples etc.

    Of course this does not mean there is no gay bashing here, it's just that I've never seen it personally.
  4. Brendan


    Jun 18, 2000
    Austin, TX
    My roomate modifies Christmas songs into "Brendan's Gay" songs. Usually a few times a week

    I'm not sure if that counts or not....
  5. Josh Ryan

    Josh Ryan - that dog won't hunt, Monsignor. Supporting Member

    Mar 24, 2001
    I think I look pretty "normal" so no, never to my face anyway. Could be that I'm a rather big person too; maybe it's happened behind my back? Stupid homophobes.
  6. One, being not normal is good. Two, 90% of homophobes are closet cases[I think](I heard it somewhere). Three, nothing says "leave me alone" like the middle finger.

    And if not just incoherently scream and run at them.
  7. Fortunately, I've never had to put up with anything like that.

    Although, if I ever did experience it, I have no idea how I would respond.
    Hopefully I'd be mature about it and just leave them to their stupidity, but who knows?
  8. I hate gay bashers. It's never really made sense to me why people think because of their sexuality they're below them. I mean, I get the idea, but it's never made sense to me. My uncle is gay, and recently was robbed and beaten a couple of months ago. We suspected the people were gay bashers, because my uncle is openly gay. (He's a drag queen DJ for crying out loud! He's stage name is "Miss Kitty Litter" and thankfully, he makes an ugly woman :p ) I think everyone in the world should have one gay relitive. I've never had a problem with it. I marched in the Gay pride parades one year, and in various gay-straight allience parades. I think homophobes just don't accept things, and still think the world is in the year 1958.
  9. I have friends who are gay and built and have exacted vicious (if just) vengence on gay-bashers. Ultimately though, I've found that homophobes are (among other things) highly insecure. I've found that with people like that, be they homophobes, other such bigots, or just plain jerks, that if you ignore them they just make themselves look stupid.

    If you go over and yell at them, fight them or otherwise show them that what they say bothered you and they feel like they have power over you. If you just ignore them, they end up feeling like an idiot and will grumble to themselves end up looking like the a**holes they are.

    My friend once said that the opposite of love isn't hate, it's indifference. People can manipulate you using love or hate, but if you just ignore them there's nothing they can do. I think this is probably the best approach for jerks on the street etc., other times though, I try to be prepared for the worst in the hopes that it won't happen.
  10. Mike Money

    Mike Money In Memoriam

    Mar 18, 2003
    Bakersfield California
    Avatar Speakers Endorsing Hooligan
    Edit by Jazzbo.

    Extremely inappropriate post Mike. Even if it was meant as a joke, it was in bad taste.

    Keep it clean, okay?

    Thank you.
  11. Brendan


    Jun 18, 2000
    Austin, TX

    ...Mike, I'm not sure I wanna be in your sig at this particular moment.
  12. Mike Money

    Mike Money In Memoriam

    Mar 18, 2003
    Bakersfield California
    Avatar Speakers Endorsing Hooligan
    Well, I worded that kinda badly...

    I've noticed that when people stop being so uptight about stuff, and just let loose... things seem to run smoother. Bashing when purely in jest, and everyone knows it is in jest (like at my school) is a healthy thing. Thats what I mean.
  13. I think you're taking it to far.

    First off, I wouldn't consider what you're saying to be "bashing" because it's obviously not. You're friends with all these people and you have an understanding. My roommate and I make jabs at his Jewish heritage and we both make jabs at my unbelivably white, WASP-y upbringing. There's an understanding that we're friends and it's (to overanalyze a point) a reaction and mockery of the racist views both of us have grown up around and been exposed to through various media and experiences. I don't think that this type of jabbing is a necessity because humans have a billion other flaws inherent to them that can be mock without needing to bring in racial and ethical backgrounds. But because that's what we're surrounded by, that's what we react to.

    Secondly, there's a massive difference between you and I making jokes at our friend's expense, and they at ours; and a random person seeing you on the street, passing judgement on you, and then espouting various derogations and stereotypes. Essentially, someone you don't know and who doesn't know you is telling you that you need to fit into this stereotype and basically being a jerk when you did NOTHING to them. THAT is bashing. And if all racism and bigotry based on ethnicity, sexual orientation and the like, were wiped clean from the earth, I don't think our survival as a species would be jeopardized in anyway at all. Nor do I think the human condition would be deteriorated. It would probably be improved a good deal, but there are also a number of other problems we have to deal with.

    I understand what you're trying to say, but I think you did a piss poor job at saying it.
  14. Killdar


    Dec 16, 2002
    Portland Maine
    If some jerk came up to me and called me gay (in an attempted hurtful way) I'd have to go and try to grope him or something to really freak him out. :D And I'm not gay, so it'd be hilarious.
  15. Woodchuck


    Apr 21, 2000
    Atlanta (Grant Park!)
    Gallien Krueger for the last 12 years!
    My cousin is gay, and I was walking with him in NYC, when some threatened male started in on us. I simply asked him, "How would it look for you get your arse kicked by a fa**ot?" He mumbled and walked away.
  16. Back in high school I was friends whit a very good drummer. Incredible. I really admired him. We didn't hang out or anything but we were always cool to one another. Then one day I found out he was gay. Changed my life. It will happen to you.
  17. jazzbo


    Aug 25, 2000
    San Francisco, CA
    Let's all be civil with this thread guys. I'm keeping a very close eye on this, and if it comes close to getting out of line, it's being shut down.

    Stern warnings will be handed out, and if anybody does or says anything too inappropriate, I will strongly push for a temporary ban. Let's all be nice, civil and remember that there are homosexual members on this board.

    Thank you.
  18. i'm openly bi-sexual. but its extremly accepted in my community. being gay and lesbian and bi and all that. a poll taken in my school in 1999 was that 55% of the students were gay, bisexual or lesbian. thats just an indication of my town. but there always are incidences, such as my old drummer hwo had a hard time comming out because his band members teased him alot. poor guy. but anyways. i'm sorry that poo happens. it relaly shoudnt anymore.but theres always gonna be people like my parents who kick thjeir kids out of the house for the way they are.
  19. Well I'm bi myself. I've just started to come out, as I was working in Koln a few weeks ago, and like JMX says, it's so normal. I was so amazed by the level of tolerance there that I just wanted people to know so all would be cool. So far everyone is cool with it and i haven't got much bashing, but that's because im only telling my friends at the moment. Once it all gets out, I expect the normal mocking, but unfortunately (did I spell that right?) that's just something that happens everywhere. It's happened before, just some random stranger who thought I was gay, and eventually ended up with him finding his "posse", me getting beat up and my phone taken. But there's scumbags everywhere, just one of the hazards I guess. Soon as I'm old enough to get off this introvert, stuck in the sixties island (as much as I love it) I think I'll move to the continent. Probably Germany, as German is the only language I'm any good at! All will be good then, and the people will love me... *dreams*

    Hey thanks Jazzbo.


    Jun 1, 2003
    Orlando, FL
    i have no problem with gays, and i dont understand why others do either. to me its just a group of people that have a certain interest per se, no different than say a group of people that enjoy fishing. now im not a big fisher, but that doesnt mean im going to go bash those that are. same with gays. whatever floats their fruitloops is cool. i think variety really is the spice of life, and that means people of all facets of life, including their sexuality. as long as they dont hit on me, i'm cool with them.

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