Just need to vent in written form to see how whiney it sounds, maybe it will also help with my depression. So last Monday we had a horrible practice, the AC being broken in the warehouse we use only added to the misery. I couldnt seem to remember any of the songs well and I had to refer to my cheat sheets, which threw me off tempo. Wed. practice got cancelled by the drummer saying that she had a sick kid and the before Fri. practice my Singer/guitar player called to cancel and to say he wanted to talk about the band. So I met him that night at the warehouse thinking he wanted to talk about switching locations for practice due to the AC possibly not getting fixed for a while. To give you some background; I started this band with the guitar player/singer about a year ago for fun, me being a total amateur with just a bare grasp of where notes are on the fret board and thats about it. My guitar player was a friend who had been playing for 20 years or so, self taught and having been in a couple of garage bands who played out over the years but nothing really professional. The drummer came in about 6 months ago; she has been musically trained since ages 9(she is 47 now) started playing flute in school and also plays various other instruments. When we started it was just for fun and so I could learn how to play better and I really loved it as a stress reliever from the daily grind. Well we were progressing fairly well, I admit I wasnt practicing enough, but I find it difficult to practice the bass lines without accompaniment and listening to the CD of the original bands we covered wasnt all that much help as I find it difficult to pick out a bass line sometimes plus we tend to play them slightly different as I dont have the chops to go much beyond root notes most times. Well after a few months of practice we had 20 or so songs down enough that the guitar player asked us if we wanted to play out at his wedding followed a few weeks latter by a couple of gigs at his local Moose lodge just for experience playing in front of other people. Well low and behold the lodge actually wanted us to come back next month and the one after to play for money. Great except that that meant we had to put another 20 songs or so into our sets over the next month or so, possibly more, yikes. So anyhow I get to the warehouse and my Guitar player starts off by telling me that we have been friends for a long time and I hope this isnt going to upset you too much.. yeah this is where alarm bells started going off. He basically said that he has always wanted to be in a playing band and now that we have gigs coming up he just doesnt think I can cut it and we have reached a plateau and things seem to be degrading. So I am out and they are going to find somebody to replace me. I didnt blow up, which is strange for me, as I dont take rejection very well, but I figure he does have a point about my playing, I dont practice more then a couple of hours on the days that we dont meet and I dont even know another bass player who can help me out. I have been learning our songs by wrote but so many similar songs confuses me when I practice by myself, I will start playing one song and find myself switching to another song right in the middle and have to refer to the cheat sheets, which by the way my guitarist has decided have to go if we play in front of people. What really ticks me off is the fact that we started to just play for fun and the pressure to play out has made it more like a job, which has sucked all the fun out of it for me. They knew coming in that I had only been trying to seriously play for a few months and never mentioned anything about my deficiencies holding them back, from what they really wanted to do. I was unaware that they had these goals until the guitarist dumped me, I feel it is unfair of them to expect me to catch up to their level, they expect me to learn 2-4 songs at each practice and be able to play them by the next practice without looking at the cheat sheets. I thought of asking them for a second chance and that I would apply myself more to my home practice but after 6 hours of going over our old sets I realized that there was no point to it since as soon as we start adding more songs I am just going to be in the same position again. I am pretty depressed about the whole thing to the point where I just want to sell all my gear and tell my friend of 10 years or so to disappear out of my life.