GRIT: Memoirs of a Musician pt. 3

Discussion in 'Bass Humor & Gig Stories [BG]' started by RareEB5, May 14, 2012.


  1. RareEB5

    RareEB5

    Apr 17, 2012
    Union Grove, AL
    "We need some PAYIN' gigs!"

    I apologize for the lapse of time since my last post. I must admit I didn't think anyone was paying attention!

    So, after high school, I was in limbo. OTIS was done, all post-high school attempts at a band had fallen apart, and I had no prospects on the horizon. I knew the worst thing that could happen to any musician was to get stale, so I worked on my chops and upgraded my gear. I had a 4x10 cab custom built for me, so I decided to sell my old Kustom combo.

    I walked into a local music store called Yonder Mountain. It was ran by this old hippie named Armand and he was as out of place in this small Alabama town as you could imagine. But he had the only game in town, so I dragged in my old combo to sell it to him.

    We struck up a conversation as I sat in his store and jammed on some cheap bass he had. Armand must have liked what he heard because he started talking to me about the band he was putting together with his girlfriend, Tina.

    In retrospect, I did learn a lot from this experience. I will point out one lesson I learned here: Never work with a guy who is putting together a band for his girlfriend/singer.

    When he said he would pay me to play, my eyes lit up. For some reason, playing music for money had never occuried to me before. I was a broke, unemployed soon-to-be-in-college kid and the prospect of making money to play music was about the best sounding thing I had ever heard.

    A few problems surfaced. One, I was underage and technically not allowed in any bar around. Two, it wasn't a full band; we were missing a lead guitarist and a drummer. Three, I would be asked to play 4 hours worth of material that I didn't know and didn't want to play. Tina (singer) was used to singing to an instrumental track so the music had to be perfect.

    So I tackled the problems one at a time. I got my older brother's ID (fortunately we look just alike) to get past the age problem. I recruited Kyle from OTIS to play lead (Armand found a drummer), which turned out to be a good and a bad idea. And I devoured as much of the setlist as possible. They played old country & western music with a little bit of 60's folk music mixed in for good measure. By the time the date of the gig rolled around, we'd agreed to do 1/2 of the set live and the other Tina would sing with her tracks.

    We lined up an audition at the local American Legion (I wish I was kidding) and made it through one set cleanly, which was all we needed to land the gig. We were lined up to be the house band the following weekend. Everything was falling into place.

    Life lesson number 2: In my personal opinion, chick singers are nothing but trouble. Although it would be a few years before I.completely swore off women vocalists, I learned the lesson the hard way.

    The night of the gig, Tina decides she doesn't want to do the vocal track. She wants to do the whole show live. Only one problem: the BAND wasn't ready! Armand packed the CD player anyway, but he never hooked it up. Then at the end of the third set, Tina wants to do her track! Armand scrambles to set it up, but before he can Tina storms off and refuses to come back. Armand blows up, storms off in the opposite direction, and also refuses to come back on stage. We still have one set to do to fulfill the contract...

    So Kyle and I, along with the drummer, did what amounted to an OTIS set. Kyle's doing insane Zakk Wylde-esque solos and playing behind his head (which he would also do to Merle Haggard songs, so like I said it was good and bad)... in an American Legion. Somehow, we survived and finished the night. But the Tina and Armand Show was on hiatus until further notice...
     
  2. how about posting them all in one thread?
     
  3. Unprofessional

    Unprofessional

    Mar 5, 2012
    [QUOTE=RareEB5;
    Life lesson number 2: In my personal opinion, chick singers are nothing but trouble. Although it would be a few years before I completely swore off women vocalists, I learned the lesson the hard way.

    I hate to say it but, "truth". A couple of months ago before practice, my BL and dear old friend gui**** sat down with me to shoot the breeze. The conversation topic turned to a local "infamous" female BL/gui****/songwriter and what she was up to now. This morphed into a discussion of how many local bands with female lead singers had survived any length of time. We couldn't name one. It's a shame, really.
     
  4. RareEB5

    RareEB5

    Apr 17, 2012
    Union Grove, AL
    I'm still writing them! Lol but thanks for reading
     
  5. RareEB5

    RareEB5

    Apr 17, 2012
    Union Grove, AL
    Unfortunately it is sad but true. Especially when, as in this story, the singer is involved with one other member of the band. It never ends well.
     
  6. RareEB5

    RareEB5

    Apr 17, 2012
    Union Grove, AL
  7. RareEB5

    RareEB5

    Apr 17, 2012
    Union Grove, AL
  8. Primary

    Primary TB Assistant

    Here are some related products that TB members are talking about. Clicking on a product will take you to TB’s partner, Primary, where you can find links to TB discussions about these products.

     
    Jun 13, 2021

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