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"hell" at church.

Discussion in 'Bass Humor & Gig Stories [BG]' started by wilser, Dec 22, 2004.

  1. ok, I'm a christian, just started to attend a new church in town. Got through auditioning for the contemporary band. First sunday, 4 sets in one morning.

    1st set:
    - everything went pretty smoothly, feeling confident, everything is cool.

    2nd set:
    - walk up on stage with a cocky attitude, looking around smiling, cue to enter, start playing, nothing comes up, check the knobs, the headphone amp, the mixer, nothing ...forgot to plug the cable on the bass!

    3rd set:
    - feeling a little humiliated I plug in the bass, un plug it and replug it to double check, strap on the bass, cue to enter bass line, start playing ...ahh, sound! about 30 secs into the song the bass dives into the floor!!! the damn dunlop strap locks weren't fully locked in!!!! try to hold the bass with my right leg, while reading the music, balancing in one foot and playing (ever try to play with your right hand fingers while holding the bass up to position by pulling on the B string with your thumb?)

    4rd set:
    - ahh, redemption! everything went good. And so has every other set since. Or so you may think! half way through the last set, we walk off for prayer, but nobody told me that while the pastor was praying we were supposed to walk in and set up! so the band starts playing after prayer without a bass player ...I run to the stage and set up just in time for the bass cue.

    talk about HUMILIATION!!!! this was all in ONE MORNING!!!!
  2. ElMon

    ElMon Supporting Member

    May 30, 2004
    Oklahoma City, OK
    That's cuz Jesus sat down when he played the bass, just like AJ. Lesson learned
  3. seanm

    seanm I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize! Supporting Member

    Feb 19, 2004
    Ottawa, Canada
    This is why I switched to Schaller strap locks. Too many times I thought I had the Dunlaps locked when they weren't. I have now learned to tug out (away from the bass) to make sure they are locked!
  4. Josh Ryan

    Josh Ryan - that dog won't hunt, Monsignor. Supporting Member

    Mar 24, 2001
    agreed. I like the schallers. the on;y annoying thing is that a lot of basses come with larger screws than the Schallers are made for. Easy fix though.
  5. Joe Nerve

    Joe Nerve Supporting Member

    Oct 7, 2000
    New York City
    Endorsing artist: Musicman basses
    I was always told that god has a wonderful sense of humor. :)

    I'm sure you learned lots that morning. If nothing else, that's it's all good and you lived through it all. And that's a lot.
  6. jive1

    jive1 Moderator Staff Member Supporting Member Commercial User

    Jan 16, 2003
    Owner/Retailer: Jive Sound
    Humility is not a bad thing, especially as a supporting musician. Who says you never get anything practical out of church? :D
  7. johnvice


    Sep 7, 2004
    Teh Chrisitian Apoligists, C.S. Lewis, wrote that pride is the root of all sin. That means humility is a good thing. The Lord was merely testing your patience !

    I never had a problem with straps. A year ago, I got an Aerodyne and a matching Levy strap and the strap was popping off at the bridge end once every gig. I put Schallers on all my basses. It's well worth it!
  8. msquared


    Sep 19, 2004
    Kansas City
    When I first read the topic of this I thought you might have been talking about covering "Hell" by the Squirrel Nut Zippers in church. :)
  9. RevGroove

    RevGroove Commercial User

    Jul 21, 2002
    Burlington ON Canada
    Manager, Account Services: Long & McQuade Ltd. (Burlington); MTD Kingston Basses International Emerging Artist; Bartolini Electronics Emerging Artist
    Man, that's a lot of sets! Is that one service or spread out over more than one?
  10. Munjibunga

    Munjibunga Total Hyper-Elite Member Gold Supporting Member

    May 6, 2000
    San Diego (when not at Groom Lake)
    Independent Contractor to Bass San Diego
    God was getting even with you for something you did.
  11. Playing in church is great, for lots of reasons. Help with humility is one. You probably won't make the same errors again, but you'll find new ones. Offer your service to God, pray his will be done. Keep a servant's attitude-- look for what you can contribute, consider the playing in church to have nothing to do with showing how good you are-- that you're doing it just to help. It's a great privilege to do live music every week for God!
    Best regards,

    (who has stepped on his cord and pulled it out of the bass while standing up more than once, in a quiet service(such a noise!))
  12. dls59

    dls59 Supporting Member

    I can't count the number of worship service gigs I've done in the past 3 decades. I've had the strap come loose a few times, always at the bridge, but not since I went to straplocks.

    I've had sound systems smoke themselves in the middle of worship, the lights go out in the middle, etc. I was doing a special song once (lead singing and playing bass) and the lead guitarist broke a string right before his solo. His guitar went totally out of tune. One of the worst trainwrecks I've ever been part of.

    I did an entire set with my fly open. I've gotten a nosebleed in the middle of a set. Thankfully, these all happened many years ago. I'm sure there are more.
  13. srxplayer


    May 19, 2004
    Highland, CA
    Yeah what he said. :)
  14. srxplayer


    May 19, 2004
    Highland, CA
    Defintetly a test of patients and humility playing on a worship team.

    We have all been there. :)
  15. Dynna


    Oct 23, 2004
    One of my fondest memories is having my Newfie(from Newfoundland) Pastor, who'd only been at our church for 3 months, and was doing a series on the Lord's Prayer, turn to us 2 minutes before the service and ask, "do you think we could SING The Lord's Prayer after the sermon today?" Of course, I'm like, "uh, no. That's not really a good idea. It's really hard, blah, blah, blah" he replies, "well we'll see"(Which I now know, 12 years later, means we're doing it).

    Sure enough, he wants to sing it. We pick a key, start, and I immediately turn to the drummer and say "don't play". We then proceeded to have the piano player play her version of how she remembers having heard it, the guitar player plays his, and I play my version of how I think it goes. ALL while our Newfie Pastor "leads" the song with varying time changes and interpretive melodies. What a train wreck.

    We did find a transcription during the next week, not that that helped the pastor know how the song went. But it was a lot better thant he week before.

    Playing in church is ALL about service. Once you get that firmly embedded in your brain, the fun begins.
  16. ahhh such are the joys of playing at church....
  17. srxplayer


    May 19, 2004
    Highland, CA
    Playing in church is ALL about service. Once you get that firmly embedded in your brain, the fun begins.[/QUOTE]

    Our pastor has done things like that too. Thank God he doesn't sing but he has had us drop songs that we worked are butts off trying to get down and add songs during the service when we aren't prepared and or don't have the right singers.

    It's all good though. We put it in Gods hands and we just play. We will get through the song and leave the stage area while walking back to our seats we will laugh it off and joke about how bad we must have sounded. Then all of a sudden someone from the congregation will come up and say.

    "you guys sounded great" :confused:

    Must be a God thing :D
  18. Munjibunga

    Munjibunga Total Hyper-Elite Member Gold Supporting Member

    May 6, 2000
    San Diego (when not at Groom Lake)
    Independent Contractor to Bass San Diego
    I'm beginning to think it's actually safer to play in bars.
  19. Matt Till

    Matt Till

    Jun 1, 2002
    Edinboro, PA

    I'm pretty sure Jesus played an upright
  20. Nope, they only had washtubs back then.