HeY Guys! I FoUnD TheSe FUNNY JoKeS On da InTeRneT!! DuRR WrOnG FoRum LOL

Discussion in 'Bass Humor & Gig Stories [BG]' started by Noobai, Nov 12, 2002.

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  1. Noobai


    Aug 25, 2002
    Stanford, CA
    until I found these, enjoy :D

    A man goes to an exotic tropical island for avacation. As the boat nears the island, he notices the constant sound of drumming coming from the island. As he gets off the boat, he asks the first native he sees how long the drumming will go on. The native casts about nervously and says
    very bad when the drumming stops.
    At the end of the day, the drumming is stillgoing and is starting to get on his nerves. So, he asks another native when thedrumming will stop. The native looks as if he's just been reminded of somethingvery unpleasant.
    "Very bad when the drumming stops" he says,and hurries off
    After a couple of days with little sleep, our traveller is finally fed up, grabs the nearest native, slams him up against a tree, and shouts "What happens when the drumming stops?!!"
    Bass solo

    Did you hear about the Bass player who finished high school?
    Neither have I

    How is a bass solo like a sneeze?

    You know its coming, but there nothing you can do to stop it

    a bassist...tired of being rediculed by his peers, decided to learn a real instrument...so he walked into the instrument store and said..."I'll take that red trumpet and that accordian over there"
    The Store clerk looked at him for a minute and said..."OK...you can have the fire extinguisher, but the radiatior has got to stay"

    Q: How many bass players does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Just one, so long as a roadie gets the ladder, sets it up and puts the bulb in the socket for him

    Two bass players walk into a bar
    which is funny...cuz youd think the second one would have seed the first one hit it

    A man gives his son an electric bass for his 15th birthday, along with a coupon for four bass lessons.
    When the son returns from his first lesson, the father asks, "So, what did you learn?""Well, I learned the first five notes on the E string.
    Next week, after the second lesson, the father again asks about the progress, and the son replies, "this time I learned the first five notes on the A string."
    One week later, the son comes home far later than expected, smelling of cigarettes and beer.
    So the father asks, "hey, what happened in today's lesson?"
    Dad, I'm sorry but I couldn't make it to my lesson. I had a gig!"

    Why don't bass players play hide and seek?
    Because no one will look for them

    What's the difference between a bass and a trampoline?
    You take off your shoes to jump on the trampoline
  2. This should go into the bass humor or misc. forum.

    I always thought that it took 3 bass players to screw in a light bulb; one to hold the bulb a la Lady Liberty, and the other two to drink until the room started to spin....but I guess that I have been spending too much time with hockey teammates instead of bandmates as of late.
  3. Ívar Þórólfsson

    Ívar Þórólfsson Mmmmmm... Supporting Member

    Apr 9, 2001
    Kopavogur, Iceland
    Wow, I pity this post when it reaches Bass Humor. It´s going to get slammed by our very own Dave Castelo :)
  4. Bryan R. Tyler

    Bryan R. Tyler TalkBass: Usurping My Practice Time Since 2002 Staff Member Administrator Gold Supporting Member

    May 3, 2002
    Heard most of them before, but thanks for the attempt. On to Bass Humor this goes...
  5. Ryan L.

    Ryan L. Moderator Staff Member Supporting Member

    Aug 7, 2000
    West Fargo, ND
    This is the "Basses" forum. This has nothing to do with basses.

  6. Dave Castelo

    Dave Castelo

    Apr 19, 2000
    im going to let this one alive since I have realized that i will NEVER win the battle against people POSTING THE SAME JOKES OVER AND OVER


    come on people, do a search or be original (like some people here)

    :( sad day for the BH forums

    Edit: couldn't resist lol :)
  7. SuperDuck


    Sep 26, 2000
    Bwahahaha That made my day :D
  8. eli

    eli Mad showoff 7-stringer and Wish lover Supporting Member

    Dec 12, 1999
    NW suburban Chicago
    Priest, rabbi, and minister walk into a bar.

    Bartender says, "What is this, some kind of joke?"

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