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(Hopefully) new joke...

Discussion in 'Bass Humor & Gig Stories [BG]' started by LarryJ, Mar 20, 2002.


  1. LarryJ

    LarryJ banned

    Dec 12, 1999
    Encino, CA (LA)
    I hope it's new, & I hope it's funny...

    A guy goes out on a tour of the jungle with a guide.
    Suddenly, they hear these jungle drums...

    Dum-duh-duh-duh! Dum-duh-duh-duh!, etc.

    The tourist says: "Omigod, what is THAT?!!"

    Guide replies: "Do not worry- the jungle drums are how the natives speak! As long as we can hear the
    drums we're safe!"

    That night as they make camp & settle in, suddenly
    the drums stop!!

    The guide has a terrified expression!
    The tourist looks at him & says:
    "The... the... drums STOPPED!! NOW WHAT!!??"

    The guide looks at him with eyes wide w/ terror and says:

    "NOW----BASS SOLO!!"
     
  2. Dave Castelo

    Dave Castelo

    Apr 19, 2000
    Mexico
    not new :(


    funny anyways, its like the tenth time i have heard it here in all my time here
     
  3. LarryJ

    LarryJ banned

    Dec 12, 1999
    Encino, CA (LA)
    Hey, I tried to inject a little humour into an otherwise dreary forum.....:(


    Sorry!:D
     
  4. Brendan

    Brendan

    Jun 18, 2000
    Austin, TX
    Watch who's form your calling dreary! :mad:



    ;):D
     
  5. LarryJ

    LarryJ banned

    Dec 12, 1999
    Encino, CA (LA)
    My Bad!

    I...ummmm... meant to say "cheery" !!!

    :D :)
     
  6. Me:"Call that a joke?!......This is a joke..."

    *pulls silver spoon out of pocket*

    Notme: "That's a spoon(!)"

    Me: "Ahhh... I see you've played jokei spooni befor!?"

    :rolleyes:






    (sorry)
     
  7. Chip

    Chip

    May 2, 2000
    i want a beer now :)
     
  8. Me to :p
     
  9. I can't have a beer:(
     
  10. Aquinas

    Aquinas

    Mar 16, 2002
    Sydney, Australia
    Beer!? Beer is horrible, a glass of brandy thank you.
     
  11. shawnc

    shawnc

    Apr 16, 2002
    California
    A father buys his son a bass and tells him that he would pay for the lessons.

    After the the first lesson, the father asks his son
    "what did you learn today".

    The son said. " see this top string. it's the E string."

    " That's great", the father says.

    After the the second lesson, the father asks his son" what did you learn today".

    The son said. " see this 2nd string. it's the A string."

    The follow week the father was waiting for his son to return home from his lesson. After several hours the son comes home and the father asks, "where were you".

    The son replies, " I had a gig."
     
  12. frankencow150

    frankencow150 Guest

    Oct 17, 2001
    i dont get it.
     
  13. Dave Castelo

    Dave Castelo

    Apr 19, 2000
    Mexico
    that's like the twentieth time i heard that one too :p

    hehe

    sorry!!!

    keep em coming... i know some people haven't read those
     
  14. 4stringr

    4stringr

    Apr 29, 2002
    Biddeford, Maine
    Not a bad joke, God knows I have heard worse!
     
  15. Tom Crofts

    Tom Crofts

    Mar 15, 2001
    The real version of that joke is...

    A father buys his son a bass and tells him that he'll pay for lessons.

    After the the first lesson, the father asks his son
    "what did you learn today".

    The son said. " see this top string. it's the E string. I learnt the first five notes on it"

    " That's great", the father says.

    After the the second lesson, the father asks his son" what did you learn today".

    The son said. " see this 2nd string. it's the A string. I learnt the first five notes on this one as well"

    The follow week the father was waiting for his son to return home from his lesson. After several hours the son comes home stinking of sweat, beer and smoke. The father asks, "where were you".

    The son replies, " I joined a punk band."
     
  16. Tom Crofts

    Tom Crofts

    Mar 15, 2001
    Some more bad jokes...

    What do you call the guy that hangs around with musicians?

    The singer.

    What do you call the other guy that hangs around with musicians?

    The drummer.
     
  17. FightinIrish

    FightinIrish

    Apr 10, 2002
    What do you call a drummer without a girlfriend?

    Homeless


    What was the last thing the drummer said to the band?


    Hey guys lets play one of my songs.
     
  18. bizzaro

    bizzaro

    Aug 21, 2000
    Vermont
    Whats the difference between a large pizza and a musician?..........A large pizza will feed a family of four!!
     
  19. J.S.

    J.S.

    May 2, 2002
    What's the difference between a bassist and a toilet?
    A toilet only need to take ****s from one ******* at a time...
     
  20. 4stringr

    4stringr

    Apr 29, 2002
    Biddeford, Maine
    hey J.S., those are good ones. I will have to tell them today at practice, nice work.



    "chicks dig bassists." "music is food for the soul, and laughter keeps us all young.":cool: