How do you tell a guy you're not interested?

Discussion in 'Off Topic [BG]' started by disenchant, May 19, 2007.

  1. Phil Mastro

    Phil Mastro

    Nov 18, 2004
    Say "I'm not interested". It's rough, he'll take a hit, but it's the best and cleanest way to do it, no doubt.
  2. txbasschik


    Nov 11, 2005
    Leander, Texas
    Its impolite, and shows a lack of consideration for your dinner companion. Eating like you're going to have to fight for your food, and chewing with your mouth open, is gross.

    And this is Emily Post with your Etiquette Update!

    Cherie ;)
  3. disenchant

    disenchant You can't plagiarize yourself.

    Aug 9, 2006
    Elgin, IL
    Oh CREEPY! Normally I do the stalking!

    Thank God this guy doesn't know where I live.

    MAJOR METAL The Beagle Father Supporting Member

    You can allways start crying and flipping out saying you are not ready yet , thats a great way to make most men uncomfortable then escape.
  5. MJ5150

    MJ5150 Moderator Staff Member

    Apr 12, 2001
    Olympia, WA
    Men are all different. When I was dating, I was also looking for a connection deeper than physical attraction. When a woman told me she didn't feel that going on, I would sadly move on. That works for some guys.

    Others....well, being blunt may be uncomfortable for a well mannered person like yourself, but you need to do it. Just look at it this way, you won't hurt this guys feelings. He obviously is desperate and does not operate emotionally on any level below sex and boobies. Tell him bluntly to get lost, and he'll go away. You won't hurt this guys feelings. He'll just change into some clean clothes and go look for someone else to have sex with.

  6. Loose Cannon

    Loose Cannon

    Feb 12, 2007
    Yes, I have to agree with everyone saying to just be blunt and get it over with. Stalling for too long might be taken as a sign of weakness or indecision. Just do it!

    Let us know how it goes.
  7. Baryonyx

    Baryonyx Inactive

    Jul 11, 2005
    Marathon Man
    Tell him you're a massive UB40 fan, and like all of their material, he'll run a mile!
  8. Hollow Man

    Hollow Man Supporting Member

    Apr 28, 2003
    Springfield, VA
    If you ask me, people get way too wrapped up in what a date means. A date is a mutual acknowledgement that two people are single and willing to take some time to see if there's enough of a connection to date again. It bothers me when people get upset that a date didn't work out... all it means is that you spent a little time with someone who's different enough from you to not be worth pursuing a romantic relationship. People put way too much stock in what a dinner means/could mean.

    Dis, you're not here complaining about the date, but it's the belief/expectation that this guy will not take negative news well that prompted this post. In my oh-so-humble opinion, it shouldn't bother this guy (or any other guy/girl) enough to hear this kind of bad news that it makes you uncomfortable to deliver it.

    Another way to end a bad date early is to tell the guy that your babysitter has to be home by 8:00, and your three kids will need someone to look after them when she leaves. ;)
  9. Munjibunga

    Munjibunga Retired Member

    May 6, 2000
    San Diego (when not at Groom Lake)
    Independent Contractor to Bass San Diego
    Guys cannot discern between different types of smiles. A smile from a woman says, "I want you. BAD!" So be straight with him. A simple "I'm not attracted to you, and please don't make me get a restraining order" should pretty much do it.
  10. Fuzzbass

    Fuzzbass P5 with overdrive Gold Supporting Member

    For someone so young (compared to me, anyway...) you have a great deal of maturity and self-confidence. Dating is what you said it is. More importantly, men should be exactly as you've said they should be. Sadly, way too many guys aren't: they're too [selfish/vain/immature/insecure] to handle a turn-down. Because this fella can't take obvious hints, he falls into the latter category.
  11. Akito


    Dec 1, 2003
    The best and most meaningful relationships with women for me never started with a "date". Dating seems to be a way to almost guarantee awkwardness and people not really being themselves. People are much more natural and easy going IME when hanging out with a group of friends or some other social activity that isn't front loaded with anxiety and expectations.
  12. The BurgerMeister

    The BurgerMeister musician.

    Apr 13, 2006
    Big Bear, CA
    pepper spray.
  13. Toasted


    May 26, 2003
    Leeds, UK
    I thought our date went fine? I don't chew with my mouth open!
  14. xshawnxearthx


    Aug 23, 2004
    new jersey
    just say to him that he isn't the guy for you. i always liked when girls would be honest. or you could do whatmost girls would do and just not pick up the phone/answer emails.