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how you are getting any girl you are wanting

Discussion in 'Off Topic [BG]' started by tehuberc, Oct 4, 2008.

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  1. tehuberc


    Mar 1, 2007
    Hello, my name is tehuberc and I am croatia. I see lots of topics on here about girls and they are problem so I decide to tell you how you get girl easy. My advice work well.

    1st. You need establish manhood.

    I am talking about getting girl to know you're the man. You must brim confidence and act tough like Croatian mob. Girl like strong man who will beat up other men who say thing to her, so if you are not strong you need to train in gym. I suggest cow lifting and tire flipping. When you have strong man body you need to fight in front of girl for girl. Go to local disco club and dance. When another weak bodied man try to talk to your girl you fight him and win. Girl will know you won't let russians take her.

    2nd. You must soften hands

    Under Stalins rule we are put to work building tanks and planes, and this is hard work. It is rough on your hand to carry armor for tank and it makes you rough and tumble. Girl do not like rough hand for it scratch their skin. You need to soften your hand by this method. You wear glove at work and you put, ehh, what you american call "petrol jelly" in glove and squish around. It make your hand soft so you can touch girl in soft way. The softest handed yet strong man get girl.

    3rd. You must buy stock

    Girl want man who is strong and have soft hand, but they want man who can care for animal and own stock. I am talking sheep and cow and chicken, a "live" stock you may say. Go to town center and look for sheep trader and offer him all you have for his sheep. If girl is important you must give all. Take sheep to vast Croatia grassland and let them eat and grow. Show girl that you own stock and she will be attracted to you.

    4th. Must establish unibrow.

    This is the most manly trait of all. Unibrow is a sign of smart power and shows you are man. It must be thick like a caterpillar and it must have no break. The straighter your unibrow the manly you are. In America girl no like this unibrow, but in MY Croatia they will drop suspender over sight of it. I think America will learn the true power of unibrow.

    That is all I haf for now. Thank you and good luck on girl.
  2. Mark Wilson

    Mark Wilson Supporting Member

    Jan 12, 2005
    Toronto, Ontario
    Endorsing Artist: Elixir® Strings

    You're Croatia?
  3. Croox


    Sep 16, 2007
    South Side Chicago
    do what they do here in America, look and act like a douche.

    my method is I find a GIANT cucumber and put it down my pants, then find a girl I like and Point at it repeatedly and thrust in her direction. my method is cheaper and works better.
  4. McHaven


    Mar 1, 2005
    Oh dear god, this is great.
  5. Oric


    Feb 19, 2008
    Georgetown, Kentucky
    has someone been watching Spinal Tap?
  6. Steve


    Aug 10, 2001

    Keep it in front. It works better.:D
  7. Croox


    Sep 16, 2007
    South Side Chicago
    it took one try to learn that. :atoz:
    and besides you cant butt thrust at somone!
  8. fetfet


    Apr 13, 2008
    Toronto, ON
    Is this a joke?

    Because it's hard to tell.
  9. TheDarkReaver

    TheDarkReaver Banned

    Mar 20, 2006
    Lincolnshire, UK
    The non-english speaking grammar makes this thread epic. It makes me read it in eastern european accent.
  10. fenderhutz

    fenderhutz Supporting Member

    Jan 28, 2007
    Harpers Ferry WV

    Or like Borat.
  11. Hahahaha I did.

    Douchbaggery FTW

  12. This thread is win.
  13. L-A


    Jul 17, 2008
  14. HeavyDuty

    HeavyDuty Supporting Curmudgeon Staff Member Gold Supporting Member

    Jun 26, 2000
    Suburban Chicago, IL
    I call BS. tehuberc, nice try.

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